For My Derelict Favorite

A long-distance carriage trip was a lot harder than I imagined.

Romantic moments, as described in the common rofan novels, are only a brief moment, and most of the moments are battles with tremendous shaking, motion sickness, and boredom on unpaved roads.

Still, in my case, there were few disadvantages of boredom. Think about it! It’s rather strange to sit next to my favorite all day in a small space and not get excited!

However, I thought of something to relieve my boredom because I would be embarrassed if I kept looking into Kaelus’ face. It’s knitting!

As soon as possible, I put the knitting tools I had received from Clarice on my lap and began to knit a scarf that could be worn around in the cold weather. To be honest, I don’t know how to knit anything but a scarf.

Reading while wearing glasses – despite this uncomfortable ride, is great – Kaelus looked across me.

“What should I make?”

“It’s a scarf. I’m just bored with my hands.”

“Whose?”

It’s a question in an indifferent tone, but I can feel a subtle expectation in that tone.

I replied with a grin.

“If it’s ruined, it’s mine, if it’s not ruined, it’s yours.”

“…”

He looks dissatisfied, but even if I die, I can’t let him wear a ruined scarf around his neck. It was enough with the last kravat.

Kaelus opened the window of the carriage. Cool air rushed in.

“The air is definitely different because it’s north.”

“Hmm.”

Kaelus nodded slowly.

It’s not that it’s not, it’s really different from the temperature. Unlike the capital, which has mild weather all year round except for a brief rainy season, the weather in northern Attica was basically “cold.” If the weather was a bit bad, a blizzard was sure to swirl with the storm.

So people from Attica are famous for their survival within the empire. There are also many brave warriors.

Seeing the window of the carriage open, the escort came close.

“If we keep going at this pace, we’ll be able to stay overnight in a nearby town and enter the Attica estate tomorrow, duke.”

“I see.”

I frowned slightly at the words.

It still will take another day. It’s really far. We’ve been in a carriage for five days already.

Kaelus smiled quietly, as if he saw my expression.

“The hard journey will soon be over. Hang in there a little longer, Hess.”

“Yes…”

In fact, it doesn’t take this long to run fast on a horse. However, due to the long-term departure from the imperial city, there was a lot of luggage and many people to take, so I was intentionally moving around with a loose schedule.

In front and back of the duchy carriage, where I and Kaelus were riding, there was a carriage with the servants, including Clarice. Including the men escorting the carriage, the party bound for Attica was by no means small.

In proportion to the temperature of the cooling air, the scenery outside also became quite monotonous. Instead of colorful flowers and trees, elongated conifers increased in number.

“Attica is barren and doesn’t feed itself well. Therefore, trade with other territories and mercenary businesses are very important.”

“Duke Orcus was only interested in the mercenary business. Because of that, the people’s livelihood was very difficult.”

“I can see right away what I have to do. We need to solve the food problem first.”

Kaelus smiled softly.

“You’ll be a really great lady.”

“Ha ha, thank you. Kael.”

~~~~

We stayed one night in the last village and set off leisurely. All of the party looked excited as we were about to enter Attica.

I opened the carriage window in anticipation. It was not long ago that snow fell, and the snow that did not melt was piled up white on the side of the road.

Suddenly the carriage stopped.

“?”

While I was wondering, Kaelus asked the escort.

“What’s the matter?”

“A group of horses are coming close. The officials of the estate seem to have come to meet the lady.”

Soon, people wearing thick fur coats came to the carriage and stopped. Kaelus and I stepped out of the carriage.

“Greetings to Duchess Hestia!”

A group of people bent at once with a disciplined movement.

I glanced at Caelus in bewilderment, it felt as if I had become the boss of an organization, and he nodded quietly.

 It’s a little scary, but I plucked up my courage.

“Thank you for coming all the way to meet me. This is my husband, Kaelus.”

“Greetings to Duke Kaelus!”

Something very simple but powerful. Is this the way the North is?

Kaelus responded with a short, dry response as usual.

“Nice to meet you.”

 One of them lifted a large load from the horse.

“You won’t last long in that outfit. You have to wear this coat in the North.”

“Oh… Thank you…“

 It was a fur coat similar to the one worn by the people of that organization. I handed one to Kaelus, and I put one on. It’s definitely warm.

Come to think of it, what did Madame Harmonia do in front of such big men? When I meet her later, I’ll have to comfort her for her hard work.

.

“We’ll lead the way, my lady.”

“Okay, I’ll catch up.”

I ordered each carriage to follow in the footsteps of the estate officials. Behind a group of horses, a long procession soon followed.

The coat was as heavy as its thickness. My shoulders drooped automatically.

“…we’ll get used to it in the future, right?”

“If you wear it often, you’ll get used to it soon. Maybe we should take a walk together more often.”

Kaelus replied with a grin.

We finally stepped on the boundaries of the Attica estate. The surroundings were still desolate, but nomadic people stood out in a vast area.

“Wow….”

The first thought that came to mind. How the hell do they farm in this land? It is time to put back my ambition to solve the food problem.

Kaelus seems to be a similar sentiment.

“There won’t be many crops left to survive.”

 “I think I touched something tough, right?”

Mumbling in a slightly jaded tone, he encouraged me gently.

“You’ll do a good job. I will do my best to help you.”

“Ha… Thank you…”

After running for a long time, I finally saw the village.

A member of the coat gang came up to the car window and said,

“This is the town where the permanent residence is located.”

“Oh, really?”

Unlike the empty surroundings, the more the village approached, the more developed the street appeared. A landscape almost like a small city.

There were strong buildings along the road that could prevent snowstorms. Many people tied dogs to carts instead of horses. They all have thick fur coats and hats in common.

“If you go to the mountains, you never know when a snowstorm will hit you.”

One of the guides explained.

The young people of Attica stopped and looked at our party as the carriage procession passed.

Expectations for a new lady who will help them expand their lives. Even the trust that we will protect their safe and cozy home. This was the impression reflected in their eyes.

I finally arrived at the permanent building. It was my house where Kaelus and I will stay.

There was a welcome face in front of the gate. It was Madam Harmonia in a fur coat.

“I see the great duchess of the empire.”

I couldn’t stop laughing at her, who was thoroughly polite even though I hadn’t seen her in a long time.

“Madam Harmonia is still the same. How have you been?”

“Haha, thanks to the duchess, I’m enjoying my days without any inconvenience.”

Under the direction of the maid Clarice, the servants began to diligently unpack.

In a rather cluttered state, Harmonia guided us to the permanent residence. Kaelus gently held my hand and looked around the new house.

“Before the duke and the duchess arrived, we renovated the mansion in general. You won’t feel like it’s been empty for a long time.”

I asked carefully what I was worried about.

“Don’t the people of Attica resent Kaelys?”

My concern was quite natural, as it was my favorite who handed over a poison tea to Duke Orcus, the former lord of this estate.

But Harmonia shook her head still. 

“Fortunately, the former lord is not a man of high reputation, so the people of the land expect more from the new lady. If the duchess does the same thing as taking care of Illion’s affairs, the people here may praise you as a saint.”

“Ha ha ha… do as much as Ilion….”

Damn it. It’s not gonna be easy.

The permanent residence was much larger than the duchy of the capital in terms of the size of the mansion. There are two separate houses, and the backyard is so wide that it was rather a forest.

Is this the scale of the North? Kaelus looked surprised, too.

“It’s very wide.”

“Yes, duke. Foreigners who visit Attica usually stay for a few days or months, so they built many rooms like this. I usually use the detached house for that purpose.”

Well, there’s no way I’ll be the only one with visitors. There will be attendants, escorts, and even horses in carriage.

I mourned quietly in my heart. It is clear that the employees who followed the duke will suffer from managing the mansion in the future.

And I thanked Harmonia, who came first and laid the groundwork before we arrived.

“Thanks to Madam, I entered Attica without a hitch. You’ve done a great job.”

“Ho-ho, the residents are tough, but they’re honest. I’m sure the duke and the duchess will love this place.”

She was sure with a clear expression.

I answered, too, facing Kaelus.

“Yes, I think so.”

It’s better to be able to hold hands like this all the time under the pretext of being cold.

This is how Attica’s first day went.

~~~~

Life in Attica began in earnest.

First of all, I tried to fix up Attica’s tattered internal affairs one by one, taking advantage of the experience built up by the Illion internal affairs.

Madam Harmonia was in charge of communicating their needs to me by meeting with the estate officials and residents in person. Thanks to her exceptional talent for building relationships, I was able to communicate with the commoners without having to meet them in person.

The operation of a private clinic and a medical training center in imperial city was led by the duchy’s doctor as the “director.” He was so enthusiastic that I had little to worry about.

Kaelus also took a room in the permanent residence as his office and completely took over Illion’s internal affairs. Illion officials were uncomfortable traveling long distances, but the cold lord, Kaelus, did not mind.

I got used to the cold weather. In addition to the coats presented by the guide, the thick fur clothes worn by Kaelus and I increased one by one.

I often exchanged letters with the capital. I sent news and greetings to butler Uross and Countess Erinnis. Kaelus mainly contacted the emperor and Helios. It was because his opinion was needed in the management of state affairs.

But it wasn’t really this job that accounted for most of Attica daily life.

“Kael, wasn’t it cold last night?”

“Well, not at all.”

Even under the covers, this naked man really doesn’t look cold at all.

His arm was tightly wrapped around my waist.

“It’s very warm thanks to your temperature.”

“Ha ha…”

No lies, except for the time each of us spent three or four hours doing public affairs, we were together every minute and every second without falling apart.

Kaelus naturally learned more about me.

“Why do you like soup so much?”

“Don’t you feel better when you eat something hot on a cold day?””

“That’s true, but you’re the only one who dips rice in it and eats it.”

Seems like you don’t know. Rice soup is absolutely the best in this cold weather.

Kaelus suddenly looked sorry.

“You didn’t eat this much in the capital.”

“Oh, the imperial city wasn’t cold enough to crave this food. I didn’t really think of it.”

I chuckled.

“But I never knew you were so good with swords. Why didn’t you show me swordplay once?”

In the original novel, there was at least one scene where Helios and Kaelus faced swords and engaged in a war of nerves over Diana, but in reality, it was more than I imagined. He’s not just mimicking, he’s really good at swinging his sword.

Kaelus replied awkwardly.

“I’m just practicing for my stamina. But come to think of it, I haven’t really used a sword since I married you.”

Touching his chin, Kaelus pondered.

“I’ve been busy with my work for months since I returned to politics… When I was with Heli, I spent most of my time fighting. Is that why?”

“?”

Suddenly he smiled at me.

“I think my lifestyle has changed a little because I’m away from Heli and I’m stuck with you. But if you want, I’ll show you the sword often.”

“Oh, good!”

Her favorite body type is definitely slimmer than Helios. Unlike Helios, where you could tell that his muscles have developed even when he was wearing clothes, her favorite’s figure is slimmer at first glance.

Of course, the story of Kaelus was completely different when he took off his clothes.

“And you have to see a doctor after eating. Hestia.”

“Oh…”

Suddenly, the stern tone of Kaelus made me look sad.

“It will be our second wedding anniversary soon. I’m sure you’ve….”

Kaelus briefly muddled his words. You’re probably thinking about my return.

“…I remember you collapsed in the temple at this time, so don’t let your guard down even if you’re healthy now.”

“Well, but it’s really fine. At this rate, I won’t get sick.”

I deliberately retorted back to reassure him.

But he shook his head.

“I can’t relax until I’m sure you’ll be safe.”

It’s a little annoying, but what can’t I do if he feels uncomfortable?

“Okay, I’ll see a doctor after I eat, so you can join me.”

Kaelus replied with a heavy nod.

After a while, we sat face to face with the doctor.

“The duchess is as healthy as she was yesterday, duke.”

“Hmm…”

Kaelus, who is relieved only for one day after hearing the expert’s opinion. But tomorrow, we have to hear what tomorrow says.

Actually, my concern is separate.

“Dixie, is there a case where pregnancy is not going well despite being this healthy?”

“Yes, it’s more common than you think. Duchess, don’t worry too much, just relax.”

“Um…”

I don’t think it’s because Kaelus and I aren’t working hard enough. Rather, we do it almost every night.

But if my anxiety about pregnancy stems purely from my desire to have children, Kaelus’s anxiety is a little different.

Worried that I would die like before the regression, he worried that even this phenomenon was a sign of my death.

A frosty voice headed to the innocent doctor.

“If anything is wrong with my wife, don’t hesitate to tell her.”

“Yes, yes…!”

After leaving the doctor, I walked through the woods behind the mansion, holding Kaelus’ hand.

“I’ll be fine, Kael.”

“…”

“I’m telling you, I have a very strong feeling that everything will be fine.”

I’m not lying. Seriously, these days, I wonder if this is the real reason why I’ve been possessed and returned.

The reason I thought was the salvation of Kaelus.

It seems that the author of the original novel is not the same as the god of the world. What power does the rofan author have to make me, a reader, immerse myself in his work and even return in it?

Then it means that there’s a separate subject called “God”.

But more important to me than who the god is, why should I continue to live in this world?

Why am I living in this world. Why does God keep me here.

There was no clear answer anywhere. Still, it was possible to find answers metaphorically through life here.

It’s Kaelus. There was no reason for me to live in this world except for Kaelus.

If God had sent me here for my abandoned favorite, there would be no reason to let me leave here suddenly without doing it for him.

“Don’t worry, Kael. I’ll be fine as long as you’re alive.”

He asked me back with a not-so-bright face, as I said with a smile.

“How do you know that?”

“That’s just how it feels.”

“…”

No matter what I say, he will never be relieved. Before regression, until I safely passed the point of my death.

~~~~

Months passed like the wind. Finally, we celebrated our second wedding anniversary.

However, it was not just a day to celebrate the second year of marriage. It was a day when I was happy to survive in this world safely, changing the future before my return.

In front of the table, which is not as fancy as the capital, we drank a toast.

“I’m glad we’ve been married for two years, but most of all, I’m grateful that you survived safely.”

Kaelus said in an emotionally trembling voice.

I also responded with a smile.

“What did I tell you? I told you everything would be fine.”

He tilted his head.

“But I’m really curious. How could you be so sure?”

“Well… …it’s a special feeling for the regressor…?”

Perhaps the answer was not as great as expected, Kaelus grimaced.

I made up for it with a smile.

“Ha ha, I don’t know exactly. But I think you’re the reason I had to go back.”

“I’m the reason?”

Pretty purple eyes glistened with water again.

I smiled brightly.

“I never expected a return. But just before I died, and after I returned, the first thing that came to my mind was none other than you.”

The beginning and end of this life as Hestia has always been Kaelus. Even when I close my eyes.

And even at the moment I opened my eyes.

Even every breath I take, I always think of Kaelus.

It’s impossible for me to pursue my own life apart from him.

Are my words uncomfortable? Does it feel foolish to live only for others and not for myself?

But that’s not true. I am extremely happy, and it is unbearably painful to pursue a life of my own withoutKaelus.

“Everyone must have a purpose to be born in this land. Maybe it’s you for me.”

It’s not ‘maybe’, it’s actually an immovable conviction.

But Kaelus confesses the same as I do.

“You’re the one who saved me from dying. I got the rest of my life entirely thanks to you.”

His lips touched me still.

“You’re the owner of the rest of my life. So please be with me forever.”

I gently hugged his neck with my arms.

“No matter where you go or what you do, I will never leave you.”

I’m a little scared and nervous about living a new life that I’ve never repeated.

However, I am not lonely because I have a companion walking with me.

What kind of adventure will we have tomorrow?

My heart just swells with anticipation.