For My Derelict Favorite

The bad weather that had continued had cleared up for the first time in a long time.

“Whoa….”

I opened the window and took a deep breath of fresh air. It feels like my head was clearing up at the same time. I’m happy.

Then, with a small knock, Clarice brought a letter.

“It’s from young lady Diocke.”

“Oh!”

Oh, my God. What good news!

I quickly opened the envelope and took out the paper.

“Oh, my. .”

Wow, that’s pretty good, Diocke.

Except for the repeated greetings, to get straight to the point, Diana promised to invest. Even at the risk of her crown princess status.

Anyone who knows her character will be surprised by the news. Even the greedy Baron Potos must be spreading this good news.

“It doesn’t matter if I don’t invest at all. Hehehe….”

The revival of Baron Potos’ merchant ship business, in fact, is by no means a good thing for the entire empire. Because the business was about to sink into the water.

But I don’t care. There is no reason to take the risk of investment.

It’s just that for me, the well-being of this empire is not important.

It doesn’t matter if the wealth of the empire sinks into the water. I don’t care what the ants are doing with the stupid Diana.

“By the way, I’m curious about your secret.”

What did Diocke say to her that Diana fell for it?

Actually, there is something to point out. What do you usually do in order to quickly become best friends after an awkward relationship?

   You just have to chew the same object hard together!*

*TN: hate the same things

I don’t know exactly what Diocke would have said about me when she was sitting with Diana, but it’s obvious because she attracted investment from Diana, who was famous for not opening her wallet.

But I’m not really angry. Rather, I want to pour a bucket of compliments to Diocke for her hard work.

“But Helios won’t just wait and see….”

Unlike Diana, who is immersed only in her beliefs, Helios has quite a wide view. And he trusts my prophecies.

I’m dying to know. How is Helios coping with this situation?

 ~~~~

It was the first time in a long time that I sat face to face with Countess Erinnis.

I tasted her fragrant tea. I was impressed by the smoothness of the taste.

“Oh, what the hell is this?”

“Huhu, it’s a special grade imported fermented tea that’s aged for 100 years.”

Erinnis continued her explanation, making tea familiarly. Fermented tea tastes different depending on the time it is brewed, so you can enjoy it while drinking it several times.

I chuckled.

“It’s not comparable to what I drank at the Lily Palace.”

“That’s why she doesn’t have any friends.”

Erinnis also responded cynically.

“By the way, countess. Did you hear the news? Holy Lady Diana promised to invest a fortune in Baron Potos’ business.”

I spoke as if it were someone else’s business. It was only Baron Potos and I who knew that I had bought Diocke.

Erinnis nodded.

“I heard it, too. But as long as it’s a promise, it’s actually no surprise. The bigger thing is next.”

“Hmm? What happened?”

As expected, she has the ability to stand on her own feet. This information is her fastest and most accurate.

“It is said that the crown prince ordered the saintess not to invest with the royal finances.”

“Oh, oh….”

Helios wasn’t a regular bet, either. I can’t believe you heard my foresight and used a ‘command’ to stop Diana from going crazy.

As far as I know, in the original novel, the heroine Diana was rarely ordered. Think of it with common sense. Who dared to command a holy being who owns the power of God, whether it was a priest or a common person?

Erinnis continued in a slightly excited tone.

“The investment in merchant ships was out of the question unless there is a secret fund created by the saintess. I don’t know if Baron Potos knows about this.”

“Well, we’ll find out soon. But they’re probably trying to make some investment.”

“That’s right, marchioness. Because of her personality, she will try to keep her word no matter what.”

Erinnis agreed with me.

Then the question was.

The royal treasury was also locked, so where will Diana, who doesn’t have much money, get a large sum of money?

There is only one answer.

“…may attract funds from the temple….”

“!”

My murmur also seriously hardened Erinnis’ expression.

“Ha… I see. There was the temple…!”

A fresh exclamation immediately followed.

“The marchioness is really amazing. How can you think that far ahead?”

“Haha, don’t you think you can win a fight if you know your enemy well? I did a lot of research in my own way.”

I giggled back.

In the meantime, she seemed to be focused on overthrowing Diana. To be honest, I didn’t expect inspiration to come up so soon.

Erinnis calmed her expression again.

“The temple will not publicly fund the crown princess.”

“I agree with the countess.”

So I feel the need even more. The conclusion that the disclosure of the property of the temple or the disclosure of the accounting books should be made public.

 “Actually, that’s why I’m working at the salon…….”

As I slipped a piece of information, Erinnis quickly showed interest.

“What do you mean working?”

“I’m going to create a public opinion to release the list of assets that the temple has built up. Even accounting books.”

“Aha….”

“But we need a good justification. I’m still in trouble because I don’t have a decisive blow to question the temple.”

“Hmm…”

We were lost in thought.

Honestly, the dust that would come out was cold and overflowing. But it was my “justification” that I ran into.

The problem was that there were no bait to fish with underneath while the fish were playing a lot. Well, that could be a justification if Diana actually took the money from the temple.

However, a more definite trigger is needed to send a hook in one shot in connection with Diana’s financial case.

It was quiet trying to figure out if there was a good way.

Erinnis suddenly opened her mouth with a voice of no confidence.

“It kept raining until not too long ago….”

“Yes, but it wasn’t as bad as last year.”

“No, not like that. When it rains a lot, there’s usually an epidemic in the slums, right?”

“!”

I looked at her with round eyes. She looked at me in surprise, too.

“Oh?”

“That’s a good idea, countess?”

“Oh, I know! I was surprised when I told you.”

Even children know that infectious diseases are easy to spread in warm and humid environments. Perhaps the clinic in the temple is busy with patients by now.

I developed my thoughts quickly.

“I can openly ask the temple why the epidemic didn’t subside. And compare the situation with other territories where the epidemic has not spread relatively.”

I smiled softly as I spoke. Because there is already a territory to be compared.

“Illion’s estate would be appropriate.”

Erinnis also smiled with her eyes shining.

“As expected, you’re Hestia. Just let me know if you need anything. I’ll help you as much as I can.”

“Thank you, oho. Erinnis.”

It is a blessing to have a comrade who works in good harmony.

We happily shared the rest of the tea.

“I’ll make the tea a little longer this time.”

“Okay. What else does it taste like?”

 ~~~~

When I got home, I called the butler, Uross, right away.

“Do you have any instructions?”

I can trust and leave anything to him who is faithful to me as much as I am loyal to Kaelus.

“We need to investigate how many infectious diseases are currently circulating among the people of imperial city. I need someone to go to the temple clinic and residence to find out.”

“Then it would be enough for the people in the mansion, Lady Hestia,”

“Okay. It’s dangerous to get sick, so be sure to cover your nose and mouth with a thick cloth.”

Diseases that are prevalent in humid environments are usually waterborne diseases. I quickly added additional precautions.

“Drink water separately from what was prepared in the mansion. And you have to wash your hands and face clean with soap before coming into the mansion.”

“I see. I will follow your instructions without fail.”

Uross left me as soon as he wrote down the instructions.

An investigation into the outbreak of the epidemic must have been carried out by state agencies.

Nevertheless, the reason why I want to look into it separately is to understand the situation in the field that cannot be fully understood by documents alone.

This is because I need to hold at least one more piece of information so that I can use it as a weapon that can be immediately returned when the temple tries to refute my attack in the future.

I murmured again with admiration.

“I can’t believe that Erinnis came up with all these ideas….”

Of course, I may meet her as an enemy after the common goal of Diana disappears.

But then I’m not even sure what my existence will be like in this world.

Therefore, I cannot afford to consider my life after that.

I have no choice but to rush like a bison, just for the goal in front of me.

I don’t look back and reflect on my actions.

I am not responsible for the consequences of my actions in the future.

I belong to the world outside this novel.

This is not my reality.

Do whatever I want.

I have no choice but to go ahead with what I want to make.

 ~~~~

One day, while we were preparing to fight against the temple while investigating the epidemic situation of ordinary people.

Kaelus called me into the study.

“Hestia, I got a call from the palace.”

“The imperial palace? Is it the prince?”

“That’s right.”

Unknowingly, I distorted my face reflectively.

But Kaelus, with his dry face, recited Helios’ message.

“When I enter the palace for a political report, he said you should join me.”

“Me too?”

It was a little unexpected, so I was a little dazed for a while.

It was a little unexpected, so I was a little dazed for a while. Helios called Kaelus and I together. Why?

He nodded as if to answer me.

“I think you have something to talk about on public business.”

“No, I don’t know anything about the country….”

Instinctively I edged back. What I know best is the original novel, not the execution of official duties!

Kaelus laughed softly.

“The other day, Heli said jokingly. ‘I wish you and Hestia could attend a cabinet meeting together’….”

“Wow, that’s the creepiest joke I’ve ever heard.”

I shook my head in disgust.

“Anyway, since the crown prince called me, it is too much to refuse such a reasonable excuse. It’s better to approach gently.”

“….”

 I can’t really tell what’s in the head of that foxy kid.

I thought I knew him well with my experience of binge-reading the original work several times, but there were some parts that I didn’t expect when I encountered it in real life.

How nice it is to be as simple as the heroine.

“When are you going…?”

When I asked, showing that I didn’t want to go all over my body, I got a dry answer.

“Tomorrow.”

“Oh… Yes…”

I bowed my head and turned around helplessly.

I could hear a low laugh behind my back.

 ~~~~

The next day, we headed to the Lily Palace.

This time, I was completely revealed without covering my face with a veil like last time.

Seeing that the people I encounter are little by little surprised, it seems that something will soon circulate in society. For example, I’ll be joining Kaelus in state affairs soon.

Oh, it’s a headache just to think about. I shook my head violently.

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh, it’s just… It’s because I’m trying to get rid of all the miscellaneous thoughts.”

“Hmm.”

Kaelus frowned slightly, but asked no more.

Then we arrived in front of the office of Prince Helios. The servant who was guiding us went inside first. Then, again, he told us.

“Please go in, marquis, marchioness.”

I bowed briefly, followed Kaelus into the office.

A few times I came to see a familiar scene. Helios was sitting at his desk, as before, moving his pen. After raising his head and making eye contact with us, he put his pen down and leaned back in his chair.

“Oh, you’re here.”

Instead of a cumbersome manner, Helios raised his hand as usual and pointed to the sofa. We sat quietly accordingly.

Two servants each came in with a tray. One was tea, and the other was surprisingly coffee.

“…”

I alternately looked at the coffee kettle and Helios with a sour look.

It’s said that if you do something you’ve never done before, bad things happen soon. What’s wrong with this guy today?

Kaelus’ expressionless eyes also had a slight wonder.

“Is it for my wife?”

“It is well known that the marchioness enjoys coffee.”

I was so touched that my bias referred to me as “wife,” and because of Helios, who knew a long time ago that I usually drink coffee but spoke like it’s new.

I felt dizzy from the feeling of being beaten twice.

Still, I have to pull yourself together. This never bodes well.

“What you have to say to me today must be very important. Otherwise, Your Highness wouldn’t cater to my humble tastes.”

Helios frowned.

“I did you a favor in a long time, but is that the only reaction?”

“I’m sorry, your grace. but you’re different than usual, so I had to worry you were happy.”

“…if you can’t speak….”

The male lead clicked his tongue disapprovingly.

Kaelus looked at Helios with a clean, dry expression as usual.

“Your highness the crown prince, is it something that Hess has to help with?”

“Oh….”

Helios became a little embarrassed.

I screamed inside again without a sound. Hess! My favorite called me Hess in front of Helios!

Helios finally breathed a deep sigh.

“Well…,it’s actually because of the upcoming dinner with the foreign envoys.”

Kaelus and I nodded almost at the same time.

The foreign envoy refers to diplomats from other countries in the empire, that is, foreign ambassadors.

The imperial emperor had to invite them once a year to have a grand dinner to strengthen diplomatic relations with each country.

But unexpectedly, the problem must be at the very ‘big’ dinner.

“As you know, the imperial princess is in charge of the imperial palace’s events and ceremonies.”

That sentence from Helios ended the whole explanation.

If it’s a dinner served by Princess Diana, there’s no way she’ll ever speak.

Kaelus looked at his old friend with dull eyes.

“Her highness the crown princess will be able to hold the event safely. Why did you call my wife and I at the same time?”

“…”

Helios closed his mouth and looked at Kaelus. “Are you really asking because you don’t know?”

Somehow, if Kaelus’s words sounded like they were  provoking him, would it be too much for me to think about.

I stared at the steaming cup of coffee.

“….”

So this coffee was kind of a bribe. I mean, I want to get my hands on an important event that Diana’s going to screw up.

“Didn’t you say that you received a plan from the crown princess a few days ago?”

“Don’t you remember the last one? She made them pray to God to bless them.”

Kaelus and Helios were having a rare quarrel.

It seems that the two have already talked about the dinner more than once. Even so, it seems Helios had come to the conclusion that if he summoned me today, no matter how much he thought about it, it wouldn’t be like that.

If I cut in on a dinner that Diana had already planned.

“… Her highness will be angry, your highness the crown prince.”

The two men stopped talking and turned to me.

I tried to squeeze the tip of my lips that were about to twist.

It’s so funny.

So this is what the gold-eyed kid is thinking. At a time when Diana and I are like enemies, it wouldn’t make much difference if we put one more issue of being enemies.

I clenched my teeth and said.

“This is also related to the prestige of the royal family. I can’t just mess around here.”

There could be a backlash from conservative aristocrats. In other words, they may face unwanted backlash.

Helios dragged his hands down his face.

“I know very well that I can’t completely upset Diana’s dinner plans. But I don’t want to be misunderstood for neglecting diplomats.”

“….”

“…”

Neither of us had immediate words to answer. I fully understood Helios’ concerns.

“Is there any good way? I need your wisdom.”

His voice was very earnest.

“….”

I looked at Helios coldly.

This situation is very funny.

Male lead Helios, expressed in the original, was simply a man with an invincible specification. No difficulty, no adverse conditions could prevent his will.

But now.

He complained of his grievances in the presence of his servants, and asked earnestly to share my wisdom.

It wasn’t like this before. Kaelus was simply a supporting role to help him, and Helios never bowed down to him for lack of ability.

This was the end of the cheerful cider rofan, which had no headache and no emotion exhaustion .

This was the end of the relationship, which I didn’t worry about when I had to think about it and just enjoyed it ecstaticly.

It serves you right.

Then Kaelus opened his mouth.

“If…”

I quickly stopped my thoughts and looked at Kaelus’ lips. The same goes for Helios.

“If her highness changes it to a luncheon instead of a dinner, there will be a way.”

“Tell me in detail.”

Helios quickly opened his ears.

“Even if it’s a little light, it won’t be a big disrespect. Then why don’t we move your meal to lunch and have dinner at our marquis, not at the palace?”

“Well….”

While Helios was being convinced, I pointed out the problem.

“But, Kaelus, I think the weight is more on the dinner than the luncheon. And still, if we move to the marquis for dinner, will the crown princess accept it?”

“You can’t take it completely.* But I think it’s best to at least give the impression that our empire has done its best to diplomats.”

*TN: as in Hestia can’t handle the whole lunch

Kaelus answered unshakably.

I frowned and sarcastically said.

“And I have the worst relationship with her highness, so it doesn’t matter if I add one more.”

“…”

Kaelus didn’t answer back.

Then Helios burst in.

“It’s the worst for me.”

“?”

“?!”

As the eyes of both of us gathered at once, Helios turned his head embarrassingly.

“Anyway, we’d better follow the marquis’s opinion. Let me know when you have a plan.”

That’s the end of the conversation.

Me and Kaelus left Helios’ room with an unidentified feeling.

 ~~~~

After leaving the office, I walked a few steps down the corridor of the Lily Palace, and finally I couldn’t resist and stopped walking.

“Kaelus, I’m going to talk to the crown prince a little more.”

“…okay. I’ll be waiting for you at the imperial palace library.”

“I’m sorry. Thank you.”

I quickly kissed Caelus on the back of his hand, standing upright. Then I quickly turned around and headed back to the office.

I can’t possibly go home like this.

I think I’ll be able to sleep well tonight if I ask the prince a question.

 ~~~~

“Your highness the crown prince, the marchioness is back.”

Before the servant’s words were finished, I entered with a rather profane sound of my shoes.

Helios, who sat back in front of his desk, who was about to work, looked up at me.

“Hmm? Hestia?”

“Your highness, I’m sorry, but I’d like to speak with you privately for a moment.”

I asked in a stiff tone.

Helios nodded and beckoned to the servant. Soon, only Helios and I were left in the office.

“What’s going on?”

Instead of answering immediately, I crept closer to the desk again.

“…?”

The golden eyes looked up at me in wonder. Although the eyes are pleasant with a sleek, beautiful jawline.

“Why are you married?”

“What…?”

“Why did you choose our marquis as your opponent when you were obviously at odds with Her Highness Diana?”

My voice rose little by little.

“I don’t even know if Kaelus has completely shaken off the Holy Lady, but are you going to fight him? It’s enough for me to fight her!”

“….”

The golden eye of Helios was piercingly directed at me.

“I should be the only one rolling around in the mud! I don’t want Kaelus in my fight with Diana! My husband, Kaelus…!”

Something kept choking up.

For Kaelus, Diana was truly a beautiful first love. It was the first thing that taught him love. His precious and cherished memories.

Even though he suffered death, Kaelus confessed to me. Diana may be the only love in his life.

And yet why is this arrogant man willing to spoil it!

“Your highness won, so do you think you can throw it away now? Don’t you think it’s too shameless of you to push off the consequences to Kaelus, even if your relationship is the worst?”

I mean, it’s a long way to go. Whether it burns or bursts, you two pull together and perish together.

The eyes glared at Helios were full of force. Otherwise, I might cry.

“You know what made him break up with your Highness…!”

“…Hess, Hestia.”

Unexpectedly, there was no anger in the lips that opened with difficulty.

“….”

I stopped venting for now. I had to calm down properly before I became emotional.

Helios’ face was slightly distorted.

“I’m sorry. There’s no excuse.”

“…”

“I’m really… I’m sorry.”

His eyes sank lonely.

“To you, and to Kael.”

“Don’t call him Kael.”

I clenched my teeth.

“I asked you before, didn’t I? How long are you going to clean up after the mess of the crown princess? But I didn’t expect that answer to come back like this.”

“Hess…”

“You can’t handle everything, so you’re going to kill the person who almost died and came back to life?” Alas, forgive me for the rather shallow words. It’s because I’m from a lowly commoner and I just can’t think of the right word.”

Helios looked at me for a long time, then slowly lowered his gaze.

“… Hestia. You’re right.”

A weak voice followed.

“I have no shame. And yet there are no other ways. I have no choice but to reach out to you and your husband, even though I know this is shameless.”

“….”

“I can’t leave it to anyone else. I’ll never allow a nobleman other than your husband to stand up to Diana.”

Helios looked up at me again.

“But you and Kaelus deserve it. You’re the only ones who can blame us.”

“…”

Complex emotions that could not be defined by one thing crossed my heart.

Compassion and pity in the midst of anger and bewilderment.

Maybe it’s because he apologized mildly, or because of his handsome face full of remorse.

The intense emotions subsided little by little.

“I’m so sorry, Hestia.”

A word of apology again.

This time, I took it quietly without arguing.

“…I see, your highness the crown prince.”

I bit my lip.

I didn’t come back to hold the dinner event itself anyway. If we get this much apology from Helios, we will get everything we can.

There’s still some intense emotional residue left, but that’s it.

I straightened myself up.

Then Helios’ voice was heard again.

“You really don’t care about fire and water.”

“….”

I waited in silence for the next word.

He laughed bitterly.

“It wasn’t really a lie to say that you love Kaelus.”

“Of course.”

I was dumbfounded and the way I spoke became pointy. I bent my upper body slightly toward him with a silly smile.

“That’s why you said you were jealous of him before?”

I put my face close to the gorgeous eyes, straight nose, and sleek jawline.

The tip of the lip was pulled up at an angle.

“I guess you’re jealous because I’m pouring love onto my husband?

“….”

The red lips were tightly closed and did not open.

As I expected, I’m not afraid to frown at this point, it’s disrespectful, I deserve to express my displeasure.

By the way.

“…?”

The golden eyes slowly fluctuated, and soon it shook like a strong wave!

At that moment.

“…!”

I got a chill down my spine.

Something feels strange.

Helios is weird.

I instinctively backed away.

“Hestia…!”

His extended hand swept through the air in vain.

His face was grimly distorted. I just couldn’t control my expression.

“What… are you crazy…?”

One’s true intentions faintly echoed only at the tip of one’s tongue

Helios’ figure standing in a daze.

I can’t stand it any longer.

I ran away from the spot.

 ~~~~

“Gasp…Gasp….”

I ran out of the office.

My heart thumped violently. I was out of breath.

My whole body trembled. Even my hands shook so hard that I couldn’t even hold onto anything.

“Marchioness, are you okay?”

A servant who was nearby approached in wonder.

“….”

I bit my lip and barely nodded.

I forcibly moved the immobile legs. I staggered, but took a step slowly.

No way.

This isn’t right.

How dare you.

I kept murmuring in my mouth but I didn’t know who I was talking to.

“….”

My mind went blank.

The strong scent of flowers around the Lily Palace came into my nose little by little.

“Oh….”

You have to pull yourself together.

This is the palace. A place full of cats who will bite me if they get a chance.

A viper’s den where I should never be off guard.

“Ugh….”

I clenched my teeth again.

There will be no change in my journey to the end. I can do the same in the future, as I have done so far.

“Library… Let’s go….”

Kaelus said earlier that he would wait at the imperial palace library.

Let’s go that way.

To the library.

“But… which one was it?…?”

It wasn’t as easy as I thought to get out of the panic that came at the moment. I talked to myself and tried to find my composure.

Because I lost my sense of direction for a while, I went around the Lily Palace once before I knew it,

by the way.

“…!”

A man with long silver hair was seen over the bush.

And opposite it, pink hair that’s clearly invisible but reflected through the branches.

Oh, right. Here.

It’s the Lily Palace.

Another owner of this palace, Diana.

“….”

I swallowed my breath. I couldn’t move as if I was frozen on the spot.

I even stopped breathing in case they would hear me.

I don’t know the expression of Kaelus who is turning his back on me.

I think I can hear a murmur of words.

But I closed my ears.

“…”

I don’t want to listen.

I don’t want to step in.

But what if Kaelus falls?

I couldn’t help but be nailed down.

“….”

But how long am I going to stay like this?

How am I going to deal with it if those two find me?

I have to get out of here

I have to leave.

I believe in Kaelus, who has become healthier.

“…….”

I clasped the hem of my skirt. Then I lifted it up to my knees so that I would not get caught.

Sneak. Don’t let it get caught.

I ran away from where I was again.

 ~~~~

Somehow I returned to the entrance of the palace.

I desperately grabbed the leash of reason and came to the palace library.

“Ha….”

I lost strength as if I had a long marathon race.

I could not go up all the stairs and sat down on the stairs, leaving the dignity of the aristocracy behind.

“….”

Let’s wait like this.

Kaelus isn’t in that library anyway.

“Phew….”

I tried not to think about anything as much as possible.

I emptied my mind completely.

I should enjoy the beautiful palace in front of me.

“…”

I hope time goes by quickly.

 ~~~~

How long has it been?

After staring blankly at the scenery for a long time, I finally saw Kaelus walking slowly in the distance.

“Oh…!”

Oh, that’s good.

You came all the way here without falling down.

I was truly relieved. I was worried if you were shocked by Diana’s thoughtless words.

“Kaelus.”

I smiled and waved.

He slowed down. I brushed my skirt and stood up.

“You weren’t in the library….”

I approached him, bringing up the prepared excuse.

“…?”

But something is wrong. He doesn’t look very well.

My heart sank. I ran quickly and grabbed his hand.

His hands are cold, too!

Now that I see it, he can’t even breathe properly!

“!”

I don’t ask why. Because I already know.

Instead, I quickly took out the medicine bottle from my handbag. And put it between his lips quickly and accurately.

“It’s alright, Kaelus. It’s okay now….”

I don’t know if I’m talking to my favorite or myself.

I repeated it like a spell and didn’t let go of his hand until Kaelus emptied the bottle cleanly.

“Uh…”

As if to relax, his stiff body soon began to shake violently.

I helped him down the stairs with all my might.

“It’s alright. It’s alright….”

My favorite leaned his head on my shoulder.

Leaving aside other thoughts, I tried my best to pat him and calm him down.

“….”

“…”

Today is really.

For my favorite and me.

It was a hell of a day.

“…Hestia.”

“Yes.”

After a while, Kaelus, whose breathing was quite stable, opened his mouth. I responded without hesitation.

“Shall we go back…”

“Yes.”

His will is my will.

I carefully supported him standing up.

Whether someone told us about our situation sitting on the stairs or not, the marquis’ carriage came to the library and stopped.

The coachman jumped out of the carriage. With his help, I helped Kaelus first. Then, I got on, too.

Seeing us safely seated, the coachman closed the door.

Soon the carriage set off.

“….”

“….”

Kaelus looked exhausted with his eyes closed.

My heart throbbed.

Damn Diana, you’re bringing Kaelus back to this point, who was recovering at best.

I spoke with my eyes closed as I was silently choking back my anger.

“Hestia.”

“Yes.”

“Come here.”

Kaelus puts his hand down next to him.

To me, his words were law. I moved to his side without hesitation.

Our hands clasped. It’s a little warmer than before.

“Whoo….”

A trembling sigh broke through his lips.

While the carriage was running down the street, we didn’t move.

 ~~~~

As soon as we arrived, the mansion quickly became noisy.

The doctor came running, and the butler helped Kaelus.

And the maids.

“Madam, let’s go into the room. I’ll hold you.”

“…Thank you.”

I was, in fact, completely groggy.

Leaving the work to the faithful employees, I grabbed Clarice by the arm and struggled back to my room.

“I’ll be right back.”

“…Yes….”

I didn’t even have the energy to be honest.

As soon as Clarice left, I lay flat on the bed without changing my outfit.

“….”

So many emotions are rushing by, I’m all over the place.

However, a group of maids immediately entered the room without having time to organize my minds.

“Madam, I’ll change your clothes.”

“Please lie down as you are. We’ll do it.”

Thank you.

Without a word, I closed my eyes and left myself to the ladies.

“Madam, it’s done.”

I was just lying still, but before I knew it, my clothes changed to indoor clothes.

Just in time, Clarice also carried a tray of tea. Soon, a fragrant smell of tea began to spread in the room.

“It’s a tea that helps you stay calm. Have some.”

“All right, Clarice.”

I slowly lifted up my heavy body.

I got a hot cup in my hand. Then I carefully put it on my lips.

“….”

The hot energy slowly spread through the body.

I feel like I’m going to live.

The ladies left the room so that I could relax.

Only then did it become quiet all around.

“Ha….”

Really.

It was a stormy day.

Lying in bed, I recounted what happened today.

Helios called us to visit his office.

“…….”

He asked for advice for the dinner for the foreign envoys Diana was in charge of.

Then, I asked him why he made us fight with Diana.

Helios apologized without excuse.

“…Damn it…”

The swaying golden eyes rose again in front of me.

I closed my eyes tightly as I rolled abuse in my mouth.

Lunatic.

A madman.

No one else knows, but you shouldn’t be swayed by me. You crazy male lead.

I lay on my back nervously.

No, what did I do?

Who else has been so arrogant about him as I have been? I’ve only heard a lot of people say it’s disrespectful.

But why!

“I don’t know. I didn’t see it. I’m going to pretend I don’t know.”

Yeah, you don’t have to worry.

Helios wouldn’t be expecting anything either. No, he doesn’t deserve to be expecting in the first place.

What I’m praying for now is that Kaelus doesn’t notice it.

Never, ever, ever let Kaelus see your condition. You stupid male lead.

Don’t remind him of his trauma again after barely recovering from his daily routine. It’s so hard that he can’t even breathe dealing with Diana alone.

I won’t let you hurt my favorite more than this.

“Kaelus, don’t worry. Because I’m here.”

I hope Kaelus will believe me.

I’ll never leave him until he leaves me first.

 ~~~~

After dinner, I asked Uross, the butler who was standing to serve me.

“How’s Kaelus?”

“He’s been sleeping since he saw his doctor.”

“I see….”

I came back to my room and finished washing my face.

All you have to do is go to bed.

“Well….”

It keeps bothering me.

I tossed and turned in bed and eventually sat up.

“It’s okay to peek…?”

If I’m careful not to make a noise, I won’t wake Kaelus.

When I made up my mind, it was easy to act.

I crept open the door. In the dark hallway, only the taillights dimly light up the darkness.

I feel like I’ve become a thief. I walked cautiously through the hallway, trying not to make any noise as much as possible.

His bedroom was slightly open. A man seemed to be standing by while Kaelus was sleeping inside.

The principle of “I will not leave you alone” is still not being broken. Great people.

 I paced quietly outside the door, so that he wouldn’t be surprised.

“…?”

I smiled awkwardly at the servant who came out quietly.

We exchanged words in a whisper.

“Is he sleeping?”

“Yes, ma’am. Would you like to go in?”

“Then wait a minute….”

I walked quietly into the bedroom.

“….”

Kaelus was fast asleep.

There was no movement to the point where I think he must have died if it wasn’t for the regular breathing sound.

I sat down carefully by the bed. Luckily, he didn’t wake up.

“…”

He’s sleeping beautifully, my favorite.

I’m relieved to see you sleeping soundly.

How nervous he must have been to meet Diana earlier. He ran into it when he was alone, so it would have been better if I were next to him.

It’s my fault that I left him for nothing to argue with Helios. It seems like I have some loose screws.

The more you do this, the more you shouldn’t be careless.

I can’t forgive my mistake of forgetting for a moment that Diana was freely wandering Lily Palace and getting angry at Helios.

This is why people should be cool about everything. Emotions ruin everything.

It’s a pity that he endured it, otherwise I wouldn’t have regretted it so much.

“….”

Looking at my favorite, who still didn’t move, I apologized to him.

I’m sorry, Kaelus.

This won’t happen in the future. I won’t make a mistake again.

After apologizing in my heart, I rose up, careful not to make a sound.

“….”

Kaelus with his eyes closed like a sculpture.

Lovely.

“Well….”

It’s so sad that I’m just watching.

He won’t know because he’s been sleeping for a long time, right?

“….”

On the forehead of my favorite, I put a kiss on it.

I did it very lightly.

You didn’t feel anything at all, did you?

But is he alive? When did he stop breathing?

 I thought it was noisy just a moment ago.

That’s weird.

I tilted my head.

But if you sleep deeply, well, maybe. You may have sleep apnea then.

I crept out of the room like I did when I came in.

“I didn’t wake him up.”

I whispered to the servsnts outside. They smiled and nodded.

I came back to my room quietly.

“Phew….”

Now I’m going to sleep comfortably.

 ~~~~

It was the next day.

I asked Clarice, who was waiting for breakfast at the dining hall.

“Kaelus, did he wake up?”

“He’s awake, but the doctor said he needs to rest all day today.”

“I thought so. I’ll have to convince him not to go out for a while.”

After returning to politics, Kaelus often had to go out. However, due to yesterday’s incident, I felt like he had to maintain a cautious daily life for a while.

I headed to his room.

“Kaelus?”

“Hess.”

He was sitting in bed drinking watery soup for a meal.

When I showed up, the servant and the doctor walked away quietly. I sat next to the bed with the tray that the servant had left behind.

“Eat slowly.”

He looked at me and nodded slowly.

“You’d better rest at home for the time being. Cancel your plans to go out as much as possible, and if necessary, I’ll be there for you.”

“… your share of the work will increase. I’m sorry.”

There was no energy in his voice.

I immediately waved my hand.

“Don’t say that. I’m actually sorry. I left you alone yesterday because I let my guard down…”

I have no excuse for that. I made a ridiculous mistake. I can’t bear to raise my head.

“I forgot for a moment that it was the Lily Palace.”

“Hestia, it’s not your fault.”

Kaelus put down the soup bowl. Then, he waved his hand to indicate that he had no intention of eating more.

“You ate too little.”

“There’s something more important than that now.”

Purple eyes turned to me with a serious glow.

Is it because of me again?

I shouldn’t have come when he was eating, and now I’m even interrupting his meal.

To what extent am I going to cause inconvenience?

I’m a human being.

“…Hess.”

Another hand held the hand that had no place to go.

“Yesterday, I met Diana.”

I know. I’ve seen it myself.

“Did she say anything else that stung you?”

“No, it’s not. But rather….”

Kaelus tilted his head slightly to the side.

“She asked me how I was doing.”

“Ha….”

There is nothing but a fake laugh that seemed too transparent.

Now that she’s fallen out with Helios, she’s starting to think of the sweet old Kaelus. She almost buried everything she had done to Kaelus, and approached him gently and tried to be as good as before.

Do you still have sweet water left to suck?* If you want to cheat, divorce first, Diana.

*TN: is there any kindness left from Kaelus?

No, before that, you have to kneel down and apologize to him.

“Did the Saintess apologize to you?”

“She didn’t say exactly that.”

“Oh, she’s so shameless.”

But Kaelus’ expression was strange.

“Kael…?”

“…That’s strange….”

He laughed bitterly.

“You’ll probably be very disappointed to hear this.”

“It won’t happen.”

I made a firm statement.

Nevertheless, he could not easily open his mouth and Kaelus hesitated.

I think I should open the water a little bit.

“You were happy, weren’t you? It’s unfair and cruel to think about the past, but on the other hand, it must have been nice. Right?”

“…That’s right.”

He bowed his head and affirmed.

“Haha, that’s natural. It’s because you really did your best to love without regrets. It’s nothing to be disappointed about.”

In the meantime, Kaelus has concluded that Diana was just his first love and that his relationship with her was completely over.

He emphasized it to me over and over again. There’s no way he’s going to connect with her again.

But when he actually met her, and the moment she smiled at him as gently as before instead of showing hostility.

The firm conclusion must have experienced confusion that shook all over.

“I’m a fool…?”

He asked with a lonely smile.

I shook my head firmly.

“No, it’s perfectly normal.”

Nevertheless, Kaelus’ eyes sank melancholy.

“I know. I’m stupid.”

“Kael….”

“I know how useless it is to hold on to a finished love affair, but it doesn’t cut off like a knife.”

“…”

“I’m still hurt, but I can’t be cool with it. Emotions are getting in my way. I’ve come to a conclusion so many times.”

Kaelus felt as if he could get his hands on it.

In fact, this is very common.

Even in a broken-up relationship, like Kaelus, when you end a one-sided love but face the other again after some time.

The painful past memories are scattered like mirages, and the excitement of the past is revived regardless of yiur intention.

That’s why some lovers break up countless times and rejoin, and others becomes a fish trapped in a fishing ground.

The feeling of love is completely different from the logic that can be explained objectively.

I asked cautiously.

“Are you disappointed?”

“…Yes.”

Kaelus replied weakly.

I have a throbbing pain in my chest.

That’s why Kaelus was in so much pain yesterday.

Even though he learned a lesson after experiencing it to the point where his daily life completely collapsed, he must have not known that the lesson would fly away in ridiculous vain.

But love, by nature, is like that.

Covering up all the faults that have piled up.

It’s love to focus on the other person and naturally forget about your past feelings.

“Kaelus. Love, you did it right.”

I smiled softly.

“The love that you have to be happy all the time   is, frankly, not love. It’s just a pretty prop that will shine your life.”

“…”

“That’s what love is all about. It’s not love, it’s calculation, whether it’s good or bad for you.”

“Is that so…?”

“Of course. It’s nothing to blame if you were happy to see her again, even though you were suffering so much because of the saintess.”

If only I could lift the rock on my favorite’s heart and move it.

I comforted him with all my heart.

“Because you truly loved her, it didn’t matter what you suffered.”

To make a loved one a top priority in life. In that case, I am naturally relegated to the lower ranks.

People who are skeptical about love usually do so in this part. When you’re blind looking at the other person and realize that you’ve completely forgotten yourself.

But what love is it that gives you a heart that doesn’t hurt you or lose you?

It’s just cheap self-satisfaction. Pretty decorations that will enrich your life, nothing more or less.

Love, originally, is to throw all your life away.

Like a fool.

“Kaelus, as I said before, I don’t want you to force yourself to forget Diana.”

“…”

“If it’s less painful to keep her in your arms, I think it’s better to do that.”

My favorite’s white face stared at me.

“But if you want your relationship to develop in real life….”

I stretched out my two fingers.

“There is a prerequisite. First, Diana will divorce the Crown Prince.”

“Hess…!”

“And the other one. She has to apologize for her harsh criticism of you.”

“…”

Kaelus closed his mouth with a stern look.

I shook my head.

“Otherwise, she can always hurt you deeply again for the same reason. I’ll never see to that.”

“Hestia, that will never happen. I’m completely done with Diana.”

He took my hand and lifted it.

“And now I’m married. I’m not such a mess that I want to get along with another woman over my wife.”

“Ha ha, Kaelus….”

I tapped my hand with the other.

“On paper, a couple is not a real couple.”

“…”

“And I….”

I paused for a moment, but I held myself together and continued.

“…I’m going to lose my powers in about a year. I don’t know what will happen to me then…”

“…”

“…”

There was a heavy silence.

“……Yes, that’s right. I mean, there’s a time when there’s no future in sight.”

“But before that, I will accomplish all my goals. There is plenty of time.”

“And then?”

“What?”

I deliberately pretended not to know and asked back. A sharp stab in the heart.

Kaelus’ purple snow sank seriously.

“Just because you don’t see your future doesn’t mean it’s all over.”

“Haha, of course. It’s not the end of the world.”

I tried to smile and answer back.

“That’s not what I meant, Hestia.”

A gradual hardening of voice.

Alas. I also don’t want you to fall for the shallow jokes.

His grip on my hand gave me strength.

“I’m asking you what you’re going to do after you lose your foresight. Unless it means you’re going to die.”

“That’s….”

I blurted out the end of my words.

To be honest, I never thought about it. I didn’t have the foresight, I just returned in time.

What is the premise of a return from a rofan novel? I mean, it’s death.

The reason why I don’t have more ‘predictions’ is because I died then. What’s the use of future plans after death?

More than that, how did the story go in this direction? Obviously, didn’t Kaelus start by meeting Diana?

I can’t handle it. At this rate, he’ll find out my secret.

I should avoid it first.

“Well, I’ll think about it when I get back to my room…”

I let go of his hand. I stood up and tried to leave the room.

However, the legs that were moving froze at the cool voice.

“Hess.”

“…?”

The cold purple eyes turned to me.

“You’re running away like this because you know what I mean.”

“!”

“Next time I ask you again, please give me the answer I expect.”

“…Yes.”

His tight-lipped expression somehow looked sad.

I’m sorry, too. But really, I’ve never painted my life after it’s all over.*

*TN: as in she has no idea what she wants to do after her death in the previous life

I hope I can give him a clearer answer next time, as he wished.

A “clear” answer.