Falling To Paradise

The sound of insects mixed in with the slow clatter of hoofbeats. It was a slow and tranquil sound that matched the stillness of the night.

 

While Anje remained silent for a moment, Aiden grew anxious, like a criminal awaiting a judge’s verdict.

 

“Sir Aiden.”

 

“Yes.”

 

At Anje’s stern tone, Aiden straightened his previously slumped shoulders and tensed up.

 

Perhaps she might demand a separation or divorce. Since she wasn’t aware of his condition before marriage, she might not want to live under the same roof with such a man.

 

‘And I wouldn’t blame her.’

 

If he were to make an excuse, it would be that in the past, he didn’t want to reveal such a weakness to the ‘Princess of Glasster.’

 

Even without recounting his guilt-ridden past, he could see the disgust and fear in her eyes when she looked at him.

 

As he mentioned earlier, thanks to the passage of time and life in the countryside, he believed he had almost completely recovered.

 

‘Even if she can’t live with me, could she at least stay in Leslie for a while longer?’

 

TL/N: I’M GONNA CRY.

 

He wasn’t worried about facing any repercussions from the emperor if she left Leslie. He simply wanted her to be close to him for a little while longer.

 

“Well…”

 

She hesitated, her lips trembling slightly, unsure if her words would convey her feelings properly.

 

“You must have been through a lot alone all this time.”

 

Aiden’s eyes widened in surprise at her unexpected words. He couldn’t take his eyes off her and listened intently to what she said next.

 

“I didn’t know you were going through such a difficult time.”

 

Even the story she had briefly heard in the flower field before seemed like a story that an ordinary person would have a hard time enduring. It was frequent to see precious people die or be injured right in front of him.

 

To make matters worse, he had to helplessly watch them suffer from torture, which must have left an indelible scar on him.

 

Having gone through such experiences, it was understandable why he had been reluctant to open up to someone he had just met.

 

She felt sorry for making hasty judgments about him when she had just gotten to know him.

 

Reading the emotions on her face, Aiden quickly spoke up.

 

“Oh, no. Many others went through worse things than I did. I’m fortunate to be in this condition.”

 

He recalled the other patients who had been lying in the military hospital beds.

 

Several people crossed the point of no return every day. Some ended up with prosthetic limbs or lost parts of their physical functions, such as sight or hearing.

 

Doctors and nurses all agreed that he was lucky to have returned in one piece from that dreadful place.

 

“It’s just that I’m… too weak a person to suffer for so long.”

 

Anje refuted his words seriously. Usually, she wanted to accept his words as they were, but this was too wrong.

 

“Weak? No, that’s not true. Emotional wounds hurt just as much as physical ones. Once they occur, they don’t heal easily.”

 

Although her life experience was short and much more comfortable compared to his, it didn’t mean she couldn’t empathize with the pain he must have felt.

 

Rather, she was so deeply immersed in the raw sadness that seeped out of every word he spoke that her heart ached as if being stabbed.

 

She vaguely knew that horrible things could happen to soldiers on the battlefield.

 

But this was the first time she had heard it directly, and that too, from an ordinary soldier’s vivid story. She declared sincerely.

 

“You are a very brave man who has endured pain well.”

 

Aiden clenched his teeth to hold back his trembling lips. His eyes welled up with tears, and he felt something hot welling up that could spill over at any moment.

 

He didn’t want to show her an unmanly appearance, but he couldn’t help it.

 

“Thank you.”

 

Her words soaked into his parched heart like rainwater. But even so, he couldn’t help but feel uneasy in a corner of his heart. He added,

 

“I don’t know if I deserve such praise from you…”

 

“You do, you really do.”

 

Despite her reassurance, the guilt he had carried for so long with her grew like weeds again.

 

“But I couldn’t protect my comrades who believed in me.”

 

What good is it to receive a medal, and what good is it to be promoted as the youngest captain?

 

He had watched with his own eyes as his comrades, who had been laughing and chatting just moments before, were transformed into cold corpses, and as his fellow soldiers suffered in the internment camp.

 

All he could do was harbor meaningless regrets, wondering if he could have made a better choice and saved them if he could turn back time.

 

Anje looked into his eyes and asked,

 

“But still, you tried to protect them, didn’t you?”

 

Why was he so emotional over such a simple question? He swallowed hard and barely managed to reply,

 

“Yes, I did my best.”

 

The countless scars on his body were proof of that. At times, he would carry injured soldiers on his flank and move them to the trenches, and at other times, he would deliberately provoke the guards to draw attention to himself.

 

When he escaped the internment camp, he also protected his colleagues who were escaping with him from the very end.

 

“But my skills were too lacking… If I were a more capable soldier, I could have saved more of them.”

 

He whispered faintly, as if speaking to himself rather than to her.

 

Suddenly, it became difficult to breathe, not because of a seizure this time, but because of the tears.

 

Anje raised her hand and slowly ran it down the contours of his face. The moisture was slowly absorbed into her glove.

 

“If our positions were reversed, what do you think you would have said to me?”

 

He closed his eyes and imagined. If she had gone to war and experienced the same things as him…

 

“I would have told you it wasn’t your fault.”

 

When he opened his eyes, he saw her smiling faintly through his blurred vision.

 

“Exactly.”

 

He felt an urge to press his lips against her cheek.

 

“The blame lies not with you, but with those who started the war.”

 

There was a faint mix of anger and guilt in her voice as she said this. ‘Those who started the war.’ She knew exactly who they were.

 

“Because of a few people’s greed, everyone shed unnecessary blood.”

 

Her former fiancé and her father, Duke Glasster, were among the ruling class of the empire who caused his suffering. As she withdrew her hand from him and lowered her gaze, she continued,

 

“The luxuries I enjoyed thoughtlessly in the capital were made possible by sacrifices from people like you. So, in a way, I bear some responsibility too.”

 

She remembered hearing Philip praise her father’s virtues at a banquet once.

 

‘Thanks to Duke Glasster’s support, the empire prospers.’

 

‘I am honored, Your Highness. The prosperity and joy of the imperial family are my prosperity and joy as well.’

 

Duke Glasster likely had provided the funds needed for the war across the sea,

 

In exchange for which he pushed his daughter into an engagement with the crown prince and took spoils of wars from the lands conquered by the empire.

 

Thinking that she and her father had lived in luxury at the expense of kind people like Sir Aiden Fitzroy, she felt too ashamed to look him in the eye.

 

Aiden drew her closer so she could rest her head comfortably on his shoulder. She did not refuse his silent kindness and leaned against his firm chest.

 

Her hat fell off and dangled behind her, but neither of them paid any attention.

 

“You don’t need to feel guilty. The decision to start a war of conquest was made by Philip Cardiner.”

 

“But my father supported him—”

 

“That was your father’s doing, not yours.”

 

“Still, I was… Philip Cardiner’s fiancée. Don’t you…hate me? I was engaged to the man who sent you to hell?”

 

He gently stroked the ends of her soft hair.

 

“It doesn’t matter. You are Anje Fitzroy now.”

 

The moisture that had been gathering in her emerald eyes disappeared. Anje asked with a dumbfounded face,

 

“What…do you mean by that?”

 

Aiden smiled with teary eyes.

 

“It means having you as my wife is a sufficient reward.”

 

Anje’s face flushed with warmth. She still wasn’t immune to his smile or his kind words.

 

“Do you really think…marrying me is worth that much?”

 

Despite his hair turning from black to white and the enduring pain that limited his actions for years, could someone like her really be enough of a reward?

 

He sighed at her questioning.

 

“You’ve done so much, why are you pretending to be modest? Here on this farm, and for me…”

 

He paused. He needed time to find the right words.

 

“What you’ve done for me is… I thought I would never be able to talk to anyone comfortably again.”

 

Before he met her, he was afraid to meet people. He was convinced that they would smell the scent of guilt on him and not understand his pitiful suffering.

 

So, he put up a ‘No Entry’ sign on his territory, not allowing anyone in.

 

But that iron fortress had gradually crumbled because of her sudden intrusion into his life. And today, even the remaining walls were completely dismantled.

 

In the midst of the ruined fortress, he felt an unexpected sense of relief.

 

“I can’t express in words how grateful I am that you are here with me today, listening to me and sympathizing with me.”

 

He slowly leaned toward her.

 

* * * *

 

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