I began sprinting frantically across the long corridor.
My heart felt like it would leap out of my mouth. The pressure, frightening in its intensity, turned my vision white.
I was daring to run away from none other than Eugene Evergale.
“Haa, haa.”
Throughout it all, the sound of my heels hitting the marble floor was cheerful. This was a path I always walked with small steps to maintain my proper appearance. The distance that always seemed so far now felt short.
My wide skirt fluttered about, and passing servants stared in alarm, but I didn’t stop.
I was too overwhelmed just by the air filling my lungs deep inside.
For more than a decade, I had lived holding my breath under Evergale’s name.
How much time had I spent led by futile hope?
Helena, only now, finally felt a hint of liberation.
She deliberately buried the strange distortion from moments ago.
She simply kicked off her high heels and ran up the stairs barefoot, as if she had returned to childhood.
Arriving in her room in one breath, she threw off her cumbersome dress. Earrings, necklace, bracelet. All were tossed onto the bed.
Instead, she put on the plain empire dress she had worn when she first came here. It was much simpler compared to the gifts from Eugene, but she preferred her current appearance.
‘I’m leaving things behind one by one.’
As she stood before the mirror adjusting her clothes, she saw her intricately braided hair. It was a style she always maintained for Eugene, who preferred neatness.
Because of this, Helena always woke up an hour early. It was necessary to keep her naturally curly hair straight.
Thinking only of him, she spent time on her hair without showing a trace of annoyance.
But now, Helena boldly pulled out her hairpins. As the decorations fell one by one, her secured hair loosened.
When she faced the mirror again, red waves cascaded down to her waist.
“Whew.”
She took a deep breath and exhaled.
The woman in the mirror wasn’t smiling, but she looked like a living person.
****
“Your Grace. Madam just left. Shall I send knights after her?”
“…No need. Leave her be.”
Despite Butler Gordon’s concerned question, Eugene shook his head. His jawline was firmly set as he gazed out the window.
At the end of his gaze, his wife was moving forward without hesitation. Instead of her usual neatly twisted hair, her loosely undone hair fluttered.
She left the mansion without looking back.
Eugene just watched Helena’s retreating figure as she passed through the main gate. He did not try to stop her.
It would be foolish to cling to what was merely a fleeting caprice. Recently, she had often been unable to control her sudden emotional fluctuations.
‘She left with nothing. Left behind all her maids and carriages.’
Her family had long since fallen into ruin and lived clinging to him. Although she pretended to come to her senses after marriage, who knew how long that would last.
She was a woman who was practically sold to him with just her pretty face. A woman with no money, no spare clothes, and nowhere to go wouldn’t last long outside. It would be remarkable if she lasted even a few hours.
“She’ll come back on her own soon enough.”
Eugene decided that when she returned, instead of scolding her, he would welcome her as if nothing had happened.
As if to engrave deep in her bones that this was the only place where she could be comfortable.
Being a gentle but intelligent woman, she would surely understand the intention behind his actions. This kind of realization wasn’t bad either.
If her spirit was a little dampened today, she wouldn’t dare make such a decision again.
‘Go ahead and play around outside my oversight, Helena. I’ll allow you that much delusion.’
However, contrary to Eugene’s wishes, her actions were not impulsive.
After leaving the grand duchy, Helena walked diligently toward the city. This was a day she had planned for months.
Until now, lingering attachments had held her back, but she might have been waiting for a day like this for more than a decade.
Each time, even if the guillotine’s blade struck her neck, when she opened her eyes, it was the night marking the third year of her marriage to him.
Two years after that, he would meet a woman named Natasha, who had fled from a fallen country, and take her as his mistress.
Another two years later, Natasha would die—from a villa fire accident, a carriage crash, or an unknown illness.
No matter how desperately she struggled in each regression, Natasha always died, and Helena always became the culprit.
It was truly a sinful love, but Helena had committed that foolish act three times.
Loving him so desperately, hoping that if she became a more perfect duchess, he might change, disgusted by her own powerlessness that could neither do this nor that.
He was a man terrifyingly consistent.
Making her experience the kind him over and over again, giving her pathetic, futile hope, yet not once, not a single time during the decades of regression did he believe in her innocence.
Every circumstance was killing her.
Every love killed her.
Even now, waking up in the fifth year.
‘Eugene has met Natasha without fail.’
She already knew that his footsteps had become frequent in the secluded forest, under the pretext of hunting.
In a villa meant only for his lovely woman, he would be whispering to her the same words he had said to Helena.
Soon he would spout nonsense about how he only took her as a mistress because she needed outward protection, that there were no other emotions involved, trying to convince himself.
‘I need to leave before she becomes his mistress.’
She no longer even felt the desire to fight with Natasha. What value could there be in the life she would gain that way?
Yet she also didn’t want to remain confined in this luxurious mansion anymore. She couldn’t stay by Eugene’s side like a predestined fate.
‘So you too, don’t look back at me.’
Helena finally left Evergale.
****
The sound of a soft humming melody floated through the beautifully decorated room.
In the large mirror of the dressing table placed in the center of the room, a woman with closed eyes hummed a melody.
With the woman’s humming as a background, the maid brushing her hair continued to speak gently.
When the maid’s explanation ended, the woman who had been listening quietly finally opened her eyes.
“Is that all that happened at the mansion?”
Emerald eyes gleamed beneath lush lashes. The maid momentarily stopped brushing, answering the gaze that was more brilliant than the intricately cut emeralds decorating the mirror.
“Yes. It’s a bit surprising that the madam who guarded the mansion throughout the seasons suddenly left on a journey.”
As the maid moved her hand again, the hair rippled like a golden wheat field.
The woman smiled as she picked up and opened one of the letters on the dressing table. Letters that always began with “To Natasha” in elegant handwriting were always her great source of pride.
“Was there any sign that he might leave with her?”
“He said there would be business meetings starting tomorrow. Judging by the instruction to keep the reception room ready at all times, it seems the Grand Duke will continue to stay at the mansion.”
“I see. Then have all my night dresses cleaned and prepared. He’ll be coming here soon as well.”
The smile on Natasha’s lips deepened. Seeing her improved mood, the maid cautiously spoke after gauging the situation.
“Um… Miss.”
“What is it? Do you have something more to say?”
“Since I’ve told you everything, as promised, can my brother also work at the mansion?”
Natasha smiled sweetly at the maid through the mirror.
“Of course, don’t worry. It’s only a matter of time before I become the Grand Duke’s beloved mistress, and I know how to value those who become my eyes and ears.”
Natasha placed her hand over the brush that was moving through the middle of her hair. Her white, delicate hand caressed the maid’s rough hand.
The maid’s body gave a small jolt, but Natasha gripped her hand more firmly and pulled it.
“Will you continue to be my companion when you enter the mansion? I would be so lonely without you. I trust only you, Aida.”
The cheeks of Aida, the maid assigned to serve Natasha during the day by Eugene’s arrangement, turned red.
“O-Of course, Miss.”
Her hurried response was awkward but full of loyalty. Such a tone always gave a thrilling satisfaction no matter how many times it was heard.
Natasha continued to stare at the freckles covering Aida’s face through the mirror.
‘If you’re poor, you should either have a pretty face, be smart, or have some talent. How unsightly.’
A face bearing the hardships of life was truly crude.
“Aida. How is your mother these days?”
“She’s much better thanks to your concern. Thank you so much.”
Aida had an ailing mother to support. And Natasha knew when people became most loyal.
She also knew that there was nothing easier to manipulate than loyalty born from desperation.
‘Controlling people is so easy… That woman is quite naive too. If you can’t abandon a desperate situation, you should use others to climb up.’
Natasha took the brush from Aida’s hand. Instead, she pushed a hair ornament she had selected from a box into Aida’s hand.
It was an expensive hairpin with a ruby the size of a pinky fingernail. A gasp escaped immediately.
“Ah, Miss…!”
‘See, she’s already handing me the leash with just one hairpin.’
Natasha shifted her gaze from Aida, moving without any hesitation. Soon her vivid green eyes came into focus.
“Don’t be satisfied with just that much, this is only the beginning. From now on, whatever you desire, you’ll have that and more.”
Because I’ll make it so.
The golden-haired woman in the mirror responded with a dazzling smile.
