I changed into clothes that were as inconspicuous as possible and then pulled out a black cloth to cover my hair.
This wouldn’t completely hide my presence, but at least I wouldn’t stand out from a distance.
After getting ready for my stakeout, I cautiously left my room.
If I got caught, I’d be forced to stay in bed and rest.
“…..Now.”
Seizing the moment when the hallway was empty, I ran toward the garden.
“Huh? Lady?”
“Shh, it looks like she’s trying to do something secretly, so pretend you didn’t see anything.”
“But she said she was sick and needed to rest.”
“She’s an Emblem, so she recovers quickly. We’re being overprotective, which is why she sneaks around like this.”
“Hehe, you’re right. It’s better to pretend we didn’t see her.”
However, I could hear the servants’ whispers as they passed by.
Although I felt embarrassed, I gained a bit of confidence knowing that even someone like me was being accepted.
They are indeed kind-hearted Emblems.
“…..I hope no one is watching now.”
Unlike the last time when I ran away in the middle of the night, this time I faced quite a few obstacles on my way to meet the rat.
I deliberately wandered near the garden, successfully diverting the attention of the Emblem mansion staff who were watching me.
With the cloth that had been covering my hair now wrapped around my body, I entered the garden.
Enoch would be there, in the place he had hidden last time.
“I thought your eyes would be all puffy from crying, but you look surprisingly clean.”
As expected, Enoch’s silver hair shimmered in the moonlight.
“……I didn’t cry.”
Enoch responded in a calm voice, as if he had expected me to show up.
He was squatting on the ground, holding some letters.
“Were you reading letters?”
“Yeah. They’re from my mother.”
“Do you need some comfort?”
“No, just let me rest here in the Emblem’s shade for a while.”
“……Okay.”
When I nodded, Enoch lay down on the ground without any hesitation. Watching him blink slowly at the sky made my heart ache.
“………..”
I lay down beside Enoch without saying anything and looked at the sky he was gazing at.
The starry night sky was beautiful.
However, Enoch and I wouldn’t be able to share the same feelings while looking at it.
Knowing this, I pondered what to say to him.
I felt like I had forgotten how to talk to Enoch. It was Enoch who spoke first.
“My father collapsed upon hearing news from my mother.”
“Uncle Edward?”
I was half-raised in surprise.
“Yeah. But don’t worry, he’s okay.”
“Oh… That scared me.”
Relieved by Enoch’s words, I lay back down on the cold ground. For a moment, I was so startled I thought my heart would burst.
“Cause of Cherry’s seems wondered why I wasn’t crying, so I’m telling you this.”
“……….”
I realized he had noticed my curiosity and felt embarrassed. I wanted to run away from this place.
A seven-year-old in need of comfort had read my thoughts. It was far from mature.
Whether Enoch knew I was silently berating myself, he continued to speak.
“My Grandfather, Father, everyone is worried about me. They fear I might break down at the news about Mother.”
“……Of course they do.”
“So I need to be stronger. If I show that I’m crying, everyone who worries about me will fall apart.”
“That’s a bit…”
It seems tough.
A seven-year-old who lost his mother should only need to cry.
Why does he burden himself with such responsibilities?
Enoch rubbed his dry eyes with his hand as he spoke.
“I only saw my mother a few times because we couldn’t be together. Even then, it was usually brief on the days I met you.”
“……….…”
“If I think of it as just a few more days added to the time I couldn’t see her, it’ll be okay.”
Enoch’s words were so resigned, but he couldn’t be described as mature.
He seemed more like the thoughts of someone who had come to terms with life.
I couldn’t say anything in response. This wasn’t right for a seven-year-old to think.
I didn’t know how else to explain it other than feeling like Enoch was broken.
“You’re not okay.”
“No, Cherry. I really…”
“A kid who didn’t cry because he didn’t want to worry everyone ran away?”
“…………”
“Even with an Emblem? Isn’t that just asking not to be found? Who would think a runaway from Gray would be at the Emblem? Especially now.”
It would be less worrying to just cry, shut yourself in your room, and skip a few meals.
I swallowed back these words.
“Everyone in Gray is watching over you, not because they’re afraid you’ll fall apart, but because they know you’re pretending to be okay when you’re not.”
“……..…”
“Why are you doing this when you know it so well?”
Enoch, who had been staring at the sky, turned to look at me.
His blue eyes, resembling the night sky, shone brightly.
“You’re right. I didn’t want to be found out, not because I didn’t want to worry them.”
“About what?”
“That I’ve come to dislike my mother.”
Enoch’s answer was filled with long-suppressed resentment.
It was an emotion I had never noticed while knowing Enoch all this time.
“Why, why…”
“The last time I saw my mother was the day you and I fought. I came back beaten, and she scolded me.”
It was Enoch’s first day of running away.
When Aunt Diana came to Gray Manor to spend the last moments with us before going to Kratyn Forest.
I was also scolded harshly, but so was Enoch.
“She didn’t even ask if I was okay.”
“Hey, Aunt Diana also said she was sorry…”
“So what? Anyway, my last memory with my mother became that.”
I had some responsibility for this. As I was about to apologize, Enoch stopped me.
“I’m not blaming you. I just…”
“Just what?”
“If she didn’t want our last memory together to be that day, if she didn’t want to hurt me like this, my mother should have come back from Kratyn no matter what.”
Enoch turned his gaze back to the sky as if his mother was somewhere up there.
“She should have returned, even if she had to crawl back, even if she wasn’t in one piece.”
“…………”
“After sending me letters like that.”
Enoch’s voice wavered with emotion.
I didn’t look at his face, thinking that’s what he would want. Instead, I took the letters he held tightly.
Curiosity about his sword, pride, and the promise to live together.
There wasn’t a single cliché phrase saying ‘I love you,’ but every part of the letters showed how much Aunt Diana loved Enoch.
“If she made me wait, she should have come back. A mother should do that.”
“Enoch.”
I hoped my voice calling Enoch wasn’t filled with too much pity.
But hearing Enoch’s voice slowly breaking down, I couldn’t say anything.
I wished there was something I could do for Enoch.
At the very least, I could hug this small body and share some warmth.
As I thought this and tried to get up halfway, Enoch spoke.
“What kind of mother is that…?”
‘What kind of mother is that, inspector?’
Hearing Enoch’s words overlap with Yoon Doyoon’s, my body froze instinctively.
“………”
I looked at Enoch in disbelief.
The moment I saw Enoch’s tearful eyes filled with resentment without shedding a tear, my mind was completely consumed by memories of my past life.
