Episode 86

“Hilde, are you really asleep? Are you truly sleeping?”

Hildebrandt instantly recognized that pure voice as Yvonne’s. But he didn’t want to open his eyes—he couldn’t bear to look at her. It was true; he had been the one to hurt her.

Yvonne acted as though she understood the hypnosis cast upon her, yet it was Hildebrandt himself who had ultimately endangered her.

He wasn’t even sure if the hypnosis on him was entirely broken, and having Yvonne near him was dangerous.

The compulsion he suspected commanded him to kill anything with platinum hair.

So, Hildebrandt shut his eyes tightly. He couldn’t risk even the chance of seeing her by mistake.

“Hilde, I missed you so much that I had to come.”

“….”

“I even dressed up. Look at this. How do I look in a maid’s outfit?”

Yvonne stood before him and spoke to Hildebrandt, but he didn’t respond. She slowly reached up to brush back the strands of hair clinging to his forehead and sat down beside him on the bed. He lay still, finding solace in the warmth of her gentle touch as the bed dipped under her weight.

Somehow, when she touched him, it felt as if the magical energy that had drained so quickly was filling up again.

Even his stomach, which had ached from hunger, no longer felt empty. Perhaps the joy of her visit was why he felt his strength returning, so much so that he pressed his lips tightly together to keep from crying.

“I even like Hilde’s lips because they’re beautiful.”

“….”

“But biting them like that must hurt.”

She moved from stroking his hair to touching his lips. He had to be careful not to breathe all at once, feeling her hand against his mouth.

“Aren’t you going to look at me?”

Hildebrandt struggled to keep from responding.

“Should I come back tomorrow, then?”

Like a man already dead.

Don’t come.

If she kept coming, the Emperor would only use Yvonne to torment him once more.

If he died as he was, maybe, one day, a mentalist would wipe away her memories, and she would forget him.

Hildebrandt wished to disappear from this world.

No matter how he tried, the Emperor’s cruel hypnosis laughed at his efforts.

There was no one on his side. His own parents had sold him to the Emperor for their ambitions.

And so, he had no desire to go on living.

Though no one was ever truly on his side, Yvonne had somehow become precious to him.

Even though he was the one who had hurt her, as she came closer, he felt that reckless desire—like seeing fire and yearning to touch it, knowing it would burn him.

“Would it be alright if I waited here until you wake up?”

“….”

“Would that be too much of a bother?”

Yvonne touched Hildebrandt’s face as she asked, and he had to fight to keep his eyebrows from twitching.

“Hilde.”

“….”

“Hilde, I really like you. I knew the moment I saw you that I’d marry you.”

At her words, his chin trembled as he choked back a sob.

Yvonne wasn’t a fool. She knew he was only pretending to sleep.

With a small sigh, she spoke softly.

“You don’t want to see me, do you? Is that why?”

For some reason, his silence felt like an answer to her. It hurt, and yet, seeing Hildebrandt’s haggard appearance made her heart ache even more. It seemed true that he couldn’t even eat or drink because of her.

“Make sure you eat everything I brought. If you don’t, I’ll come every single day.”

“….”

“Got it?”

She stopped stroking his hair and planted a kiss on his cheek. Hildebrandt pressed his lips together to keep himself from reacting, startled by the soft sensation on his cheek.

“Then, I’ll come back tomorrow.”

“….”

“Rest well.”

Even as Yvonne turned back multiple times before leaving, Hildebrandt didn’t move.

Click.

Once he heard the door close, he opened his eyes. His jaw ached from clenching so hard, and his vision was blurred with tears, making it difficult to see.

He glanced over at the food Yvonne had left for him. A small hydrangea was also placed on the table. Its purple blooms resembled the color of her eyes, blossoming beautifully.

Hildebrandt lifted the cover keeping the food warm, and fragrant steam rose from the meal.

‘Make sure you eat everything I brought. If you don’t, I’ll come every single day.’

He pondered her words. And so, he couldn’t eat. If he ate, she wouldn’t come anymore.

Shouldn’t that be a good thing?

Yvonne was safer not coming.

But I’m going to die soon anyway. Would it be so wrong to see her one last time before that?

And what if she’s endangered because of it?

This time had been risky, and there was no guarantee that the next time would be safe.

He stood there for a long time, lost in thought.

Tap.

But in the end, Hildebrandt couldn’t bring himself to eat.

* * *

The next morning, Yvonne somehow managed to find her way back to him, donning a maid’s outfit once again—a feat he couldn’t begin to fathom.

“Hilde, are you asleep again?”

Though he feigned sleep, a strange sense of relief washed over him as he realized she’d come again.

Indeed, as long as he didn’t eat, Yvonne would keep coming.

He despised himself for finding solace in that thought. How selfish he was.

He hated himself so deeply, yet the relief of her presence made him angry at the same time.

Yvonne was innocent. And yet, because of him, she constantly found herself in danger.

Knowing this, he felt disgusted at himself for secretly wishing she would visit him.

But I will die soon.

Once I’m gone, the Emperor’s interest will shift elsewhere.

He won’t pay attention to a young lady of a marquisate who hasn’t shown any sign of awakening her abilities.

Making me a prince in the first place was only a fleeting amusement for the Emperor.

“Hilde.”

Yvonne approached his bed, looking at his unmoving figure. She gently pulled back the sheet, revealing his face.

“Hilde, you’re just as beautiful today.”

As was her habit, Yvonne murmured this while touching his forehead.

“You feel a bit feverish. But why aren’t you eating?”

Then you wouldn’t come.

Hildebrandt swallowed the words.

“Do you lack the strength to wake up?”

“…”

“Hmm?”

Suddenly, Yvonne felt an urgency about the situation. It had been quite some time since he’d eaten. He wasn’t even drinking water. At this point, he probably didn’t have the strength to sit up and eat.

“I-I thought this might happen, so I brought this!”

Yvonne, flustered, pulled out a bottle. In her haste, the bottle slipped and fell onto the bed.

“Oh…!”

Quickly, she picked it up, opened the cap, and prepared to give it to him.

‘Drinking while lying down can block your airway.’

She recalled something her father had once told her.

Taking a deep breath to calm herself, she recapped the bottle.

Then she embraced Hildebrandt, who was much larger than her, lifting him to a sitting position. His heart pounded, and he found it hard to breathe. It wasn’t the first time Yvonne had clung to him, but this was the first time she’d embraced him like this.

She must think I’m asleep, and yet, she’s doing this.

He was unfamiliar with the sense of possessiveness and calm he felt when he touched her.

“Ugh…!”

With all her strength, Yvonne managed to hold him. Like cradling a large child, she finally propped him against her chest.

“Hilde, you’re as heavy as you are beautiful…”

Panting, she hugged him tighter and rested his head against hers.

“Wow… You’re even more beautiful up close.”

He felt his eyebrow twitch despite himself. He knew that she was aware he was awake. Still, he thought she might give up after going this far.

Straining to hold him, Yvonne opened the bottle cap again. With his eyes closed, he concentrated on listening to her actions.

“This is something my father gave me. He said it would heal everything. It’s a potion of recovery.”

Hildebrandt couldn’t understand why she was doing this. She had been bloodied because of him, yet she still went this far for him.

Was she a fool?

No, the Yvonne he knew was wiser than anyone.

Was she lacking in common sense?

No, Yvonne was even more sensible than he was. But when it came to him, she always behaved so irrationally.

“I’ll make you drink it.”

“….”

“Hilde, you trust me, don’t you?”

Hildebrandt could have refused the potion she brought, yet he didn’t.

As Yvonne’s hand gently pressed against his mouth and nudged his teeth apart, he felt the cool liquid of the healing potion trickle into his body.

“You know, Hilde… This stuff is ridiculously expensive.”

“….”

“If you still don’t wake up after drinking this, I’ll stay by your side every day. Is that alright?”

At that moment, his eyes slowly fluttered open.