Episode 104

I had no idea how much time had passed.

As I woke up, I slowly regained my senses.

Fortunately, I hadn’t had any dreams this time.

Given how emotionally exhausted I had been, it was a relief not to have experienced another dream like the one before.

Lloydin comforting me until I fell asleep had greatly helped me calm down.

Discovering such a significant and sudden truth was too overwhelming, leaving me unsure of how to proceed.

Feeling exhausted, I had sought refuge in sleep.

After a nap, I felt somewhat more composed.

The warm presence and soothing aura flowing into me made me realize Lloydin was still holding me.

His hand, which had been gently stroking my back before I fell asleep, was still there.

Though I was awake, I kept my eyes closed, pretending to be asleep, trying to organize my thoughts a bit more.

‘Sigh.’

The more I thought, the more complicated it became to figure out how to explain everything to Lloydin.

‘Why did I cry?’

I should have held back.

If I had, I wouldn’t be in this awkward situation now.

But it was only in hindsight, with my regained composure, that I could think this way. At that moment, I couldn’t hold back my tears.

I had seen the death of my husband, the man I had come to love deeply, and my family. Who could remain sane after witnessing such a thing?

The sheer desolation and despair had left me unable to think.

While I was relieved to see him when I woke up, I was also terrified.

Though he was with me now, it felt as if he could vanish at any moment, leaving me unable to control my emotions.

‘Ah…’

Tears threatened to spill again.

I took a deep breath, trying to steady my emotions.

Just as I was about to think through my next steps from the beginning, Lloydin called out to me.

“My dear.”

His voice startled me, and I flinched.

Realizing I had been discovered, I opened my eyes slightly to see Lloydin looking at me with warm, worried eyes.

“…Duke.”

“You’re awake?”

“Yes, I just came to…”

His gentle gaze made it hard to hold back my emotions.

“Why did you cry earlier? What happened?”

Tears welled up in my eyes again at his concerned tone.

“I… had a terrible dream.”

“A dream?”

“It felt so real, and it scared me.”

He continued to hold me, his presence a comforting anchor.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

I hesitated, unsure of how to explain the terrifying vision without alarming him.

“It was just… seeing you hurt… it was too much for me.”

His grip tightened slightly, a reassuring gesture.

“I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

His words were meant to comfort, but the fear of that dream still lingered.

“I know. It’s just… it felt so real.”

“Dreams can feel that way, but they’re not reality.”

I nodded, appreciating his attempt to soothe me, though the fear still gnawed at my heart.

“Let’s rest a bit more. We can talk about it when you’re ready.”

He continued to hold me, his hand gently stroking my back, helping me to relax again.

“Thank you.”

“Anything for you.”

Held securely in his arms, I felt a semblance of peace return.

His presence was a balm to my troubled soul, giving me the strength to face whatever was to come.

For now, I allowed myself to rest, knowing that we would face the future together, no matter how uncertain it might be.

After crying in his arms, I felt a bit embarrassed to look at him.

Sensing my discomfort, Lloydin gave me a gentle smile.

“Did you sleep well?”

“…Yes, I think I did.”

I answered awkwardly, smiling back. Lloydin carefully brushed back the hair that had fallen over my forehead.

“Have you been with me this whole time?”

“Yes. I was too worried to leave your side.”

“Oh…”

How could he be so kind? His concern for me touched my heart, and I had to fight back the tears that threatened to fall again.

“My dear, you still seem…”

“Oh, no, it’s just… my eyes sting a little.”

Lloydin, noticing my expression, furrowed his brow. I quickly pretended that something had gotten into my eyes.

“Did some dust get in?”

“Let me take a look.”

“Would you?”

I opened my eyes wide and looked at Lloydin as he moved closer to examine them. His handsome features caught my attention.

‘Seriously.’

Despite the serious situation, I found it amusing that I could still notice how attractive he was, and I let out a small laugh.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing. It’s just… my eyes are fine now. Thank you.”

I blinked a few times to show him that my eyes were alright.

“That’s a relief.”

“Yes.”

With that, silence fell over the bedroom.

We simply stared at each other.

I wasn’t sure how to begin, and I wondered what Lloydin was thinking.

One thing was certain: Lloydin hadn’t pressured me for answers, not before and not now.

He seemed to be waiting patiently for me to speak, his way of showing respect and understanding.

As I gazed into his deep, dark eyes, I finally made up my mind and started to speak.

“Duke…”

“Yes, my dear.”

“You must have been alarmed when I suddenly started crying in the carriage.”

“I was alarmed, but more than that, I was worried.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you.”

“It’s alright. I… sigh…”

Knowing why he sighed so deeply, I decided not to delay any longer and spoke up.

“I had a dream, a nightmare.”

“A nightmare?”

“Yes, it was a terrible nightmare. It felt so real that even after I woke up, I couldn’t shake it off.”

I carefully crafted my words, mixing a bit of truth with a lie.

I could have told him about the precognitive dream, but it wasn’t the right time to reveal what I was experiencing.

I found it hard to believe myself, so how could I expect others to understand?

Of course, Lloydin would listen earnestly and sincerely to whatever I said because that’s who he was.

But it was precisely because of that that I couldn’t recklessly share my burden and cause him unnecessary worry.

So, I began recounting the dream, slightly altered, based on what I had seen.

“What kind of nightmare did you have? I’ve never seen you cry so sorrowfully.”

“It’s just…”

Ah, the tears were threatening to fall again.

Even briefly recalling that miserable scene made it hard to control my emotions.

‘Hold it together. You have to.’

If I started crying again, it would seem like something really had happened, and my carefully constructed lie would fall apart.

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself.

“It was a nightmare where you were… you were hurt, and I couldn’t do anything to help you. It felt so real that I couldn’t help but cry.”

Lloydin’s expression softened with understanding.

“I see. It must have been terrifying.”

“It was. But I know it’s just a dream, and you’re here with me now.”

I reached out and held his hand, seeking comfort in his warmth.

“I’m here, and I always will be.”

His reassurance, combined with his steady presence, helped calm my frayed nerves.

We sat in silence for a moment, his hand gently holding mine.

“Thank you for understanding. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

“There’s no need to apologize. I’m just glad you’re feeling better now.”

His gentle smile made me feel a bit more at ease.

With Lloydin by my side, I felt a renewed sense of strength.

I would protect him and our family, no matter what it took.

For now, I took comfort in his embrace, drawing on his strength to face whatever challenges lay ahead.

“…It was a dream where something bad happened to you, Lloydin.”

“To me?”

“Yes. Something terrible happened to you…”

Despite my determination, I couldn’t help but struggle to get the words out. My feelings for him were so strong that it made it even harder.

“You were in trouble, and I was so devastated… I couldn’t do anything. I wanted to save you, but I couldn’t. I felt so helpless and useless, and I was so frustrated with myself…”

As I recounted the dream, my emotions surged again, and my words became jumbled. Suddenly, Lloydin pulled me into his arms.

“That’s enough. You don’t need to say more.”

“Duke…”

“Ah, so you cried so sadly because of a dream where something bad happened to me?”

“…Yes. It was so sad and painful.”

“My dear…”

His sigh was deeper than usual, and his voice was much lower.

“But when I woke up and saw you, I felt relieved… and then I cried even more.”

Still in his embrace, I finished what I wanted to say. It was important to let him know that I had been relieved to see him after waking up.

I hugged him tightly, wanting to feel his presence and dispel my fears and anxieties.

Sensing my need, Lloydin held me even closer.

The room fell into a comfortable silence as we shared each other’s warmth.

After a while, Lloydin spoke, his voice strained with suppressed emotion.

“I was really scared.”

“…I’m sorry.”

“When I saw you crying like that, I thought something had happened to you. My heart dropped.”

“I’m so sorry, Duke…”

I apologized again, feeling guilty for making him worry so much.

“But I’m relieved.”

“…What?”

“I’m relieved that nothing happened to you.”

“Oh…”

His words left me speechless, and a mix of emotions surged within me.

“I will never let anything happen to me.”

“What?”

“So, don’t worry.”

“Duke…”

“I will never leave you alone.”

His tone was firm and resolute, assuring me that he meant every word.

Hearing his comforting words, I felt grateful yet deeply troubled. If only it could truly be that way.

‘If only we could change the future I saw…’

Suddenly, memories from the banquet flashed through my mind. I realized that the reality I had seen differed slightly from my dream.

Could it be possible to change the future after all?

Feeling a glimmer of hope, I knew I had to stay strong and vigilant. For now, I was in Lloydin’s safe embrace, and that was all that mattered.

“Thank you,” I whispered, my voice barely audible.

Lloydin gently stroked my hair, his touch soothing and reassuring. “Always.”

In his arms, I allowed myself to believe that maybe, just maybe, we could alter our fate.