“Episode 31”
The crackling warmth of the fireplace engulfed Ray’s cheeks as he diligently delved into the borrowed book, dissecting every detail of Clopton’s life. Scribbles made out of boredom, pages hastily folded at the end, ink stains dried on the pages from accidental spills—though trivial, Ray treated them as if they were scripture.
“It’s not interesting.”
“It’s cliché.”
The teenage scribbles in the margins gradually dampened Ray’s inflated interest. He marked the passages that seemed obscure, and as he progressed towards the end, the number of scribbles diminished significantly. Nevertheless, he managed to finish reading it. A short commentary was written on the last page.
“It could be used as firewood.”
Was his younger self devoid of as much sensitivity as he is now? Despite the numerous perplexing sentences, it was still a book with meaningful lessons. Imagining the version of himself who wrote down his blunt thoughts, Ray felt a sense of detachment. It felt satisfying as if he had drunk a glass of wine.
Upon closing the book, an overwhelming sense of regret flooded Ray’s mind. Even when he peeked into his thoughts from a distance, he didn’t feel lonely, but now he felt abandoned in a land where communication was futile.
It was because of the loneliness brought by the boring afternoon. He found himself immersed in endless thoughts. Lost in his contemplation, Ray failed to notice the chilly presence in the room, except for the crackling fireplace.
“Excuse me.”
Ray quickly turned his head at the sudden voice. John stood there like a crow flying in when the beast was absent. Rainwater dripped from the edge of his hat, forming small puddles on the floor. Holding an old hat in one hand and a basket of potatoes in the other, John looked at Ray with a blank expression. It was natural for her to be surprised since she hadn’t been thinking about anything.
“Shall I clean it up for you?”
John looked at Ray urgently, as if seeing a sudden drizzle during a drought. His gaze was so intense that it felt overwhelming. Sensing the burden, Ray stood up to call Mrs. Merry.
“Just a moment. I…”
“Miss Livingston.”
Ray, who had been waiting for a shadow to pass through the kitchen, paused at the sound of the name. It pierced her memory like a seed that couldn’t be ignored. He wasn’t unfamiliar. Even the way he addressed her was more formal than an ordinary laborer. It was a tone that came naturally, not forced.
“Are you happy?”
“Pardon?”
“Are you happy?”
He asked with dryness, containing trivial content in his words. This wasn’t the first time. Ray thought he was being rude.
John tossed the potato basket aside and warmed his hands on the blazing fireplace. He shook like an animal after a bath, enjoying the warmth.
He was a peculiar worker in many ways.
“Why are you living alone? I heard you have siblings.”
It was an intrusive remark. Ray, reminiscing about the distant relative who had escaped for a long time, sighed secretly.
“I don’t know. It’s been a while since they left.”
“You don’t know?”
“Since then, not a single letter has come.”
John, who had been nervously pacing, spoke quickly.
“Take a closer look at my face.”
“John?”
In the gaze that perceived impurity, John picked up fragments of memories. Ray’s eighteenth year. There was a laborer brought into the household through a distant relative’s introduction. He was mainly tasked with fetching water, loading heavy luggage onto horses, and other minor errands. Despite the praise for his diligence written in the letter, it didn’t take long, not even a week, to realize it was all false pretense.
The most frequent incident involved harassment of the maids. When complaints from the maids piled up, even Ray’s indifferent father expressed his anger at the situation in the household. After that, there was a period of quiet for a few days. It was a courtesy extended out of consideration for the relative who made the introduction, but never did John imagine that the lazy scoundrel would dare to reach for a branch he couldn’t climb.
When the weather was good, Ray used to take walks in the garden with the lady of the house responsible for her upbringing. Despite Ray being raised differently from her sister, who attended a girls’ school, there were subtle signs that Ray also wished to attend such a school, but she would defer to the household’s decision around the time of her marriage.
It was clear that the conservative old family still preferred Ray, who hadn’t been tainted by attending a girls’ school, over her sister. John’s parents were wise in their preferences.
She was raised with great affection. Even if the suitor came from a prestigious family, it was evident that they would prefer an untouched Ray over a laborer who lived hand to mouth. It was only fitting that the culprit who deserved punishment was dealt with.
The scoundrel started targeting Ray since the day rumors spread that she liked flowers. He would pick wildflowers and make crude bouquets as gifts. The sight of them placed on Ray’s balcony attached to her room was quite chilling.
The scoundrel was somewhat intoxicated with his own sentimentality. Ray, who wasn’t particularly sharp, felt puzzled for a long time. When complaints from the maids gathered in the laundry room and the laborer walked around boldly, the situation became even more serious. It was only a matter of time before it reached her parents’ ears.
“Heart’s desire, didn’t the young lady have feelings for me?”
That was the excuse he first blurted out when questioned. In a family gathering where everyone was present, Ray naturally took a seat as well. Rather than interpreting it as the scoundrel’s last-ditch effort, it seemed like he genuinely believed in it. He shamelessly pressured Ray, who was clueless about everything, to take his side.
Before things escalated further, Ray admonished him and drove him away. Ray, who was shaken by the incident, refrained from going out unnecessarily due to the drought, and her parents hastily looked into the matter. Although it fell through due to the shifting winds in the household, looking back, it should have been resolved hastily at that time. It was one of the regrets on John’s list.
“You didn’t smile at me! Every time you passed by, you’d give me a glance!”
Ray refrained from going out unnecessarily due to the drought after feeling humiliated and being chased away. Her parents hastily looked into the matter. Although it fell through due to the shifting winds in the household, looking back, it should have been resolved hastily at that time. It was one of the regrets on John’s list.
However, Ray had equated that laborer with John, and she even called him by a name that wasn’t John’s. John, with a flushed face, nudged Ray.
“Where, where did you get the idea to compare me to that kind of guy?! You think I’m no different from that, that scoundrel in your stories?”
Ray, who had been anxiously scrutinizing John, subtly changed her gaze.
“How did…how did you know?”
“What?!”
“The person I’m talking about.”
“Well…”
John’s speech faltered. Every time he tried to clarify what had been written, his lips twisted. Ray scrutinized John with even more suspicion, and the situation, where he couldn’t make any excuses, was dreadful.
As Ray was about to rush into the kitchen in search of an answer, a creaking sound came from the stairs.
“Tsk tsk.”
At first, John thought it was Claudine and wrapped his arms around his face, but he sensed experience from the clicking sound. It was an older woman meticulously draped in a pink cape. As she descended the stairs, she grabbed John’s shoulder.
“I had a feeling it would turn out like this.”
“Such a pity.”
The old lady, as if knowing everything, patted John’s shoulder and walked away. For some reason, John, feeling choked up, could only remain silent.
“Could you please step aside for a moment?”
It seemed that Ray had something to attend to. Wasn’t it always the case? Would there be such an extraordinary opportunity again next time? However, the old lady sternly fixed her gaze on Ray. She wasn’t someone who could provide help. John, hesitating, roughly took off his hat and went outside. Without anyone to shelter him, he dashed straight into the rain.
The old lady’s gaze briefly shifted in that direction. However, it quickly returned to Ray, who remained alert without letting her guard down. The intense first encounter with the old lady made Ray tense. The old lady knew too much.
“You’ve ignored my warning.”
The old lady had once said that one day Ray would become like her, devouring souls. Thinking about the warning, Ray wondered if she might provide the key to solving the mystery.
“Are you hoping to leave Claudine’s side?”
“Why?”
The old lady, standing by the rain-soaked window, let out a sardonic chuckle. She could feel the chill of the fireplace passing through her body.
“Miss, here, you’re the only one…”
“Don’t say it.”
No. Ray had thought she might help resolve the situation. But upon further consideration, that meant not waiting for Claudine. And that old lady seemed like the type who wanted to drive Ray away. It seemed she wanted to instill fear more than reveal the truth. Ray didn’t want to be scared and run away, even if she didn’t know anything else.
“Are you afraid?”
“I am.”
The old lady’s eyes widened with surprise. Ray approached the kitchen where Mrs. Mary was.
“But I’ll talk to Claudine.”
And then she quickly turned and ran to the kitchen. It was a gesture of knowing that there was someone there who would support her. The woman who had been sitting alone by the mansion window, watching the rain, was no longer there.
“You’ll probably regret it.”
Delia sighed as she spoke. Many things in the mansion had changed. Even the former owner, who had been breastfed, showed a strange appearance, and the once shy woman had become quite bold. However, it was evident in her eyes. No matter how much things changed, there were still things that remained unchanged. That would always be the Achilles’ heel for the owner.
How close could he get to the woman who had caught his ankle? The owner had a strong ego and couldn’t bring himself to beg for the departing woman. It might be better to confine and kill her; that way, there would be no unpredictable events.
Could things change?
Today, the unchanging weather here seemed friendly. The key was how long the protagonist, who had brought about changes in the mansion that had lasted for centuries, could endure. Just watch the results.
Whether you hold onto hope or not, what will happen will happen, and what won’t change will remain the same, even if you try your best. They could only hope that the young master would remain strong there. And the woman too.
