Originally, I had no intention of using him, no matter what he meant by his words. Ever since the day he revealed his subtle feelings for me, his one-sided goodwill had felt overwhelmingly burdensome.
For a moment, when Yu-geon barely acknowledged me, I wondered if I had overthought things. But today, Yu-geon came to find me.
Willingly offering himself as prey.
Now, I’ve decided not to care about why he sought me out. I need him right now, and I have something to give him in return. That way, it won’t be one-sided.
That’s enough. Keep it simple.
Honestly, since Yu-geon hadn’t explicitly confessed his feelings, I didn’t have the luxury to dwell on him. Besides, he had said he’d keep his distance, so he wouldn’t approach impulsively.
Conscious of my restraint from feeding, even swallowing my saliva felt dry. I wanted to quickly let some blood flow through me to moisten my insides.
When the blood of a living being mixes with mine, it manifests monstrous abilities. That’s how I’ll catch the culprit and survive.
My troubled thoughts cleared during the shower. I turned off the faucet and put on the tank top and short shorts I had prepared. After lightly drying my hair in the powder room, I headed to the room where Yu-geon waited.
“What are you doing?”
When I opened the door, Yu-geon was sitting cross-legged on the hard floor. His eyes were wide open, taking in my entire figure.
“I didn’t come here for guiding.”
His tone was surprisingly firm. He must have caught on. Admittedly, my outfit wasn’t exactly meant for feeding.
Ignoring his awkward seating, I turned off the bright light and switched on the bedside mood lamp. Adjusting the room’s temperature and humidity with the controls on the wall, I also pressed the button to release a gas that aids absorption.
Soon, a thick fragrance filled the air as the gas descended from the ceiling. Though the dormitory wasn’t as good as a capsule room, it had the basic amenities. Watching my actions, Yu-geon’s frown deepened.
“Trying to make me look like the bad guy?”
“I came here on my own. I told you, I don’t mind if you feed on me.”
“I feel better guiding. I don’t know how shameless you think I am, but I’m not brazen enough to exploit someone who kind of… confessed to me.”
“That wasn’t even a confession….”
“Stop with the excuses and get up here already.”
I cut off his rambling and instructed him firmly. Yu-geon stayed put, stubbornly silent with his lips pressed tight. He seemed upset things weren’t going his way.
“Fine, I’ll believe you didn’t come for guiding. Just get up here.”
“I’m not lying; I didn’t come for guiding.”
“Yeah, I got it.”
“I’m serious.”
“I said I got it. Now stop and come here before I lose my mind from thirst.”
When I snapped, sounding like I was at my wit’s end, Yu-geon hesitated and finally climbed onto the bed. One leg bent on the mattress while the other stayed on the floor. Even then, his posture was awkward.
“You said the neck hurts, so drink from my arm, right? Which side do you prefer?”
I asked bluntly. This wasn’t an act—I was struggling to hold back.
How long had Yu-geon been in my room? The sweet scent of his blood filled the air. I bit my lip against the temptation, using all my willpower to resist immediately sinking my teeth in.
After some hesitation, Yu-geon mumbled, his earlobes slightly flushed.
“…Just drink from my neck.”
“What? What did you say?”
“Drink from my neck. I… don’t think I mind it that much.”
Don’t mind it? What does that mean? He doesn’t dislike being bitten on the neck?
The ambiguous phrasing left me puzzled. But the overwhelming thirst soon silenced my thoughts. I grabbed his wrist and half-laid him against the headboard.
He followed my lead without resistance, but as I straddled his thigh, his hands urgently gripped my waist.
“Hey.”
“What?”
“…Nothing.”
His gaze, as if asking what he was supposed to do, suggested he’d given up. Still, his previous experience pairing with me seemed to have taught him something. Once I made a decision, I followed through no matter the process. I was going to guide him and drink his blood tonight.
Clarity is best. If you’re going to do something, do it right.
“You seem fearless. Meanwhile, I’m nervous as hell,” Yu-geon suddenly admitted.
“What’s there to be nervous about? Afraid I’ll drink until you’re dizzy again? I won’t do that. I’ll go slow and take small sips.”
“No… that’s not it.”
He sighed heavily. His complicated expression mixed worry, unease, and confusion.
“What if I lose control because my wavelength is too low?”
“Don’t worry. I’m not an ordinary guide, remember?”
“Yeah… just get started. I’ll try to manage somehow.”
He didn’t seem to trust my reassurance. I knew what he was worried about. When an Esper with a low wavelength or in an unstable state undergoes guiding with a highly compatible Guide, they can lose control of their rationality.
Even though Yu-geon had a low wavelength in the early stages of our pairing, it had never dropped below 30%. Now, he was at a staggering 26%.
An Esper with such low wavelengths could lose focus momentarily and turn violent. That’s why guiding capsules had multiple emergency release buttons within the Guide’s reach.
But here, in my private space, there was no one to help if Yu-geon lunged at me. I’d have to calm him down or escape using my own strength.
That’s what he seemed to be worried about—losing control and attacking me.
Though I’m a Cremon and wouldn’t be easily overpowered, I wasn’t relying solely on that strength.
There were other ways: a precise strike to his vital points or inducing shock through an intense burst of guiding. Given the current low adaptability between us, shock tactics would work.
Of course, it was best to avoid such situations entirely. Still, there were various ways to incapacitate an Esper. I didn’t bother sharing those methods with Yu-geon—it was a little endearing watching him fret.
“Focus on yourself. Have you been getting any sleep?”
Up close, I noticed his bloodshot eyes, with veins prominently visible, and his pale complexion—clear signs he wasn’t doing well.
I placed my hand on his forehead and then slid it down to his neck to check his temperature. His pulse raced slightly under my touch. Yu-geon shifted his head, leaning into my palm with closed eyes like he was seeking comfort.
“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll fall asleep during guiding.”
“You won’t.”
I let out a playful laugh and leaned my face toward the opposite side of his neck. The moment my lips touched his skin, goosebumps spread across his neck.
“Looks like he really hates this,” I thought.
I wanted to bite him right away, but he seemed scared, so I licked his skin lightly instead. Even that small touch quickened his blood flow, and I felt the tension stiffen his jaw.
“It won’t hurt as much since we’re guiding,” I murmured.
“…Okay.”
“Touch me too. It’ll go faster that way.”
“I’ll… handle it myself.”
Yu-geon, who usually let things slide, was oddly stubborn about this.
It made sense—he’d always said he wouldn’t go beyond level two. Maybe physical contact during guiding made him uncomfortable.
I didn’t push him further. Espers’ guiding efficiency improved when their senses were heightened. Winning over a stubborn Esper was part of a Guide’s role. Yu-geon had even admitted that I made him nervous, so it didn’t feel like too big of a hurdle.
Placing one hand on his shoulder, I began gently biting and sucking on his neck. Slowly, I activated my creature state and sank my teeth in.
“Ah…”
A faint moan escaped Yu-geon’s lips, and I felt his grip on my waist tighten.
I slid my hand from his shoulder down to his chest, softly rubbing the area around his navel. At the touch, his stomach muscles tensed before relaxing with a deep, hot breath.
“It tickles… ah.”
Timing my bite with his relaxed muscles, I sucked in a tiny amount of blood. Compared to before, it was just a drop—barely anything.
Though he let out a pained sound, his muscles didn’t tense again. A tangy sweetness lingered in my mouth. No matter how many times I tasted his blood, I never grew tired of it. Slowly, I licked his skin and drew out small amounts of blood.
Yu-geon’s fingers twitched against my waist. When I guided his hand under my shirt to rest against my skin, he trembled as if he were having a seizure.
“Hey… is this really okay?”
“Other Guides and Espers do this all the time.”
“Still…”
In truth, none of the Espers I guided had wavelengths low enough to require this level of contact. Seeing him hesitate again, I added,
“Just don’t cross the line. If you try anything funny, I’ll crush your bones.”
“Wow… that’s brutal.”
Though meant as a joke, Yu-geon didn’t seem to take it that way. Understandable, considering I’d actually bitten down hard enough to crack a bone before.
Why had I done that? Thinking about it now, it felt like a dark chapter in my past—a moment where I seemed like a truly savage Cremon.
Even though I gave him permission, Yu-geon only rested his hand hesitantly near my waist. He wasn’t touching—he was more like gripping onto me for dear life.
Occasionally, when I couldn’t help but bite down harder, his grip would tighten slightly.
Yu-geon’s self-control was surprisingly strong. It made me wonder if he really was interested in me at all, given how passive he was.
“When we kissed at his place, he wasn’t like this. What’s different now?”
Thinking back, he’d been stiff at first that time too. But then, for some reason, he suddenly flipped a switch and came at me so intensely it caught me off guard.
I was guiding him now, exploring his body with my hands, but it wasn’t enough. I was determined to bring Yu-geon to stability tonight, no matter what.
Where could he possibly be sensitive? Judging by his increasingly ragged breathing, he seemed to be reacting to something.
I pulled back for a moment and stared at him.
“What?”
“Raise your arms.”
“What?”
Ignoring his confused expression, I grabbed the hem of his shirt and lifted it. Yu-geon protested, asking what I was doing, but I pulled off his training shirt completely.
