However, Yu-geon had held onto hope, believing Sa-weol when she said that she was newly awakened and that, with time, things would become more manageable.
Upon reflecting on her words, Yu-geon started to feel that the extreme, blind emotions he felt couldn’t possibly be love. It was closer to something like obedience.
Like a baby duck that imprints on the first thing it sees, Yu-geon would freeze, his heart racing, and be swept up in strong emotions—whether positive or negative—every time he saw Sa-weol. It was clear that something was wrong.
“When Sa-weol asked for your body instead of guiding, you agreed, right? You never go to the third stage of guiding with someone you’ve just met, so why was it so easy with Sa-weol?”
“Well, that’s because of the matching rate…”
“Was the matching rate really the only reason? You said you’ve been good to Sa-weol even outside of guiding. What were your feelings back then?”
“I just wanted to get closer to her. I felt like I had to protect her.”
“Protect her? Is Sa-weol going into gates? Why do you need to protect her?”
Ji-soo looked at him with increasing pity. Yu-geon couldn’t explain that Sa-weol was a Cremon, so nothing he said made sense, and he just came across as weird.
“You’re really messing up. Don’t confuse good guiding with affection.”
“That’s why I’m trying not to!”
“Then you’ve been approaching Sa-weol with feelings of affection all along. It’s not because of the guiding—you like Gu Sa-weol, you idiot.”
Ji-soo firmly concluded that Yu-geon liked Sa-weol, even as he continued to deny it.
“That doesn’t explain it. I’ve been in relationships before, but I’ve never felt like this.”
“Maybe because it’s better than any relationship you’ve had before?”
“Me, liking Gu Sa-weol? That’s insane.”
“Ah!”
In the heat of their conversation, Ji-soo suddenly clapped her hands together as if something dawned on her.
“Maybe it’s because it’s both?”
“What?”
Yu-geon frowned, not understanding.
“You like her as a guide, and you’re attracted to her. It doesn’t have to be one or the other.”
“……”
Yu-geon fell silent, lost in thought.
“There are two types of people who get obsessed with their guides.”
“There are?”
“Yeah. It’s not scientifically proven or anything, but guides talk about it among themselves.”
“Sa-weol never mentioned anything like that.”
Sa-weol had only ever told him that he’d get better, that he was just confused and overly attached because of the pair. This was new information to him.
“She probably didn’t think it applied to you.”
“So, what are they?”
Suspicious but curious, Yu-geon encouraged Ji-soo to continue.
“One type is the selfish type that wants to have everything.”
Ji-soo explained it carefully, as if she were teaching a child.
“But you’re not that greedy in general.”
She was right. Yu-geon had never been particularly greedy about anything else in his life, except when it came to Sa-weol.
He had grown up in an environment where things always fell into his lap without him having to ask. As a result, he had lived without much desire.
“The other type is someone who falls in love with their guide romantically. That’s when the obsession gets worse.”
“……”
Yu-geon felt a chill run through his body. A cold sensation crawled up his spine and into his head, freezing him in place.
“So, it’s both. You like Sa-weol as a guide and as a person. You don’t have to separate the two.”
Ji-soo was getting more excited, convinced she was right.
“Esper love is intense like that. It’s why it’s often used as a plot in movies and dramas. You’ve lived like a normal person up until now, so you kept denying it.”
“……”
“Am I right? Doesn’t it make sense?”
“……”
“Baek Yu-geon. Are you even listening?”
“……”
“Hey, Baek Yu-geon.”
“No.”
Yu-geon, still frozen, suddenly muttered as if in a trance.
“What?”
“No. It can’t be.”
“Why?”
Why couldn’t he love Sa-weol? Yu-geon questioned himself.
Was it because she was a Cremon? Or…
“Ugh…”
Yu-geon let out a groan and hung his head. His mind was too tangled with thoughts. At the same time, a memory of something he’d said in the past flashed through his head.
It was a conversation he had with Han-gyeol at home, when they had divided their boundaries regarding Sa-weol.
“Alright, let’s do as you say, hyung.”
Damn it. Why did I say that?
“But remember this—I’m not going to see Gu Sa-weol romantically, so you don’t even think about guiding her.”
And it wasn’t just that—he had added the word “never.”
At the time, his mind was completely dominated by the idea that he had to protect the guiding aspect, at the very least.
The fear of losing Sa-weol entirely to Han-gyeol had warped his attachment to her guiding. Because of this, Sa-weol misunderstood him even more, which led to the current mess.
“…What am I supposed to do now?”
It was a complete disaster. Where did things go so wrong? Do I really… like Gu Sa-weol?
“What do you mean, ‘what should you do’? You said she’s interested in your body, right? Even though she said she got tired of it, the only thing you have to offer is your body, right? So, you should use that.”
Ji-soo, who seemed convinced that Yu-geon had feelings for Sa-weol, continued giving strange advice.
“No, it’s not like that….”
“Why are you so lacking in confidence? Objectively speaking, you’re insanely handsome. You’re also S-Class. Do you know that you and your brother are the only S-Class in our branch? The other guides are practically drooling over the Baek brothers.”
“Well… my brother’s S-Class too.”
“What does Captain have to do with this? Oh, right. Isn’t Sa-weol visiting the captain’s quarters these days? What’s going on between them?”
“Hah, I don’t know.”
Despite Ji-soo’s advice, Yu-geon’s face continued to darken, and Ji-soo gave him a puzzled look.
“You know, you’re quite the catch on the outside, but you’re still so hopeless.”
Does he lack the courage to confess? After all that I’ve said, surely he’s understood, right? Or… are Sa-weol and the captain really that close?
Whatever Yu-geon was thinking, Ji-soo found it amusing. She was sure things were going to get interesting.
“I won’t tell Sa-weol about your location. You’re staying here until tomorrow, right?”
“…Yeah.”
Yu-geon looked as if his soul had left him. Ji-soo figured that things would only get more interesting if they didn’t end the pair just yet. They needed to keep clashing until something came of it—be it good or bad.
“Do you want me to bring you something to eat?”
“Yeah, that’d be nice.”
Yu-geon was suddenly suspicious of Ji-soo’s helpful behavior, but he couldn’t deny he was hungry, so he agreed.
“Wait, what’s this?”
“What?”
Just as Ji-soo was about to leave, she received a message from Ji-han. Attached to the message was a photo of Sa-weol, looking uncomfortable, facing off with another woman at the center office.
“Bring some popcorn when you come, Ji-soo. This is about to get real.”
“Sa-weol got into a fight.”
“What? Where?”
Yu-geon shot up from his seat and grabbed Ji-soo’s phone to check. Without a moment’s hesitation, he bolted out of the room.
“Hey, Baek Yu-geon! If you go there, Sa-weol’s going to catch you!”
“I’m telling you, I don’t like Gu Sa-weol! I don’t!”
Whether he misunderstood Ji-soo’s words or not, he ran off, shouting something that sounded oddly like a confession of love while vehemently denying it.
“Tsk tsk, yeah right.”
Not wanting to miss this entertaining scene, Ji-soo quickly followed him.
***
The day before.
“I went by her house yesterday, but she didn’t come home. How did she know? Did you tell her?”
“No. Maybe she checked the CCTV.”
“She’s not usually that thorough.”
Han-gyeol and I were having a casual drink at the Awakened Hotel Lounge Bar after work. I’d been chasing after Yu-geon lately, but when Han-gyeol suggested a first date, I couldn’t say no, so I ended up being dragged here.
Though I was physically here, my mind was still fixated on Yu-geon, and our conversation kept circling back to him since dinner.
“I could’ve caught him today.”
“Seems like Yu-geon’s really trying hard not to get caught.”
“Can you hold onto Baek Yu-geon tomorrow? I really need to cancel the pair by tomorrow. It’s my last chance.”
“Well, I don’t really want to get involved.”
“You know I don’t ask for favors like this.”
“Hmm.”
Han-gyeol didn’t seem bored by the conversation, but he wasn’t being particularly cooperative either.
To be honest, things had felt a bit awkward ever since Han-gyeol confessed his feelings to me. I was secretly relieved that we hadn’t run out of things to talk about, even if it was all about Yu-geon.
If Han-gyeol helped, I might be able to catch Yu-geon.
“So, what will you do for me in return?”
“Guiding?”
“You haven’t canceled the pair yet. Are you sure that’s okay?”
“Why not? That guy does whatever he wants.”
“No thanks, not guiding.”
He rejected the offer without much thought. Puzzled, I took a sip of my non-alcoholic cocktail. The tart cherry scent tickled my nose.
If not guiding, then what else would he want from me? As I was thinking, Han-gyeol casually spoke.
“How about a kiss?”
“What?”
“A kiss on the cheek. Like we used to do when we were kids.”
I blinked in surprise at his unexpected request. His steady gaze told me he wasn’t just joking.
“That was when we were kids….”
Feeling flustered, I avoided his gaze and sipped more of my cocktail. Before I realized it, I had emptied the glass.
‘Is this what it’s like to get drunk on a non-alcoholic drink? Why do I feel dizzy?’
My body felt increasingly warm, and my mind was becoming hazy. It was almost as if I were really getting drunk, with my muscles relaxing and my thoughts becoming foggy.
“You and Yu-geon are both the same.”
“Did Yu-geon ask you for a kiss too?”
“No.”
Yu-geon’s initial condition had been that if I didn’t get close to Han-gyeol, he would keep my secret. He had promised to act like he didn’t know.
“That guy’s even worse.”
“Our Yu-geon might be clueless about some things, but he’s a good kid.”
“Are you defending him just because he’s your brother?”
In the end, we renegotiated, and now, instead of guiding, I would receive Yu-geon’s blood. He had quickly agreed, thinking it was meant to intimidate him.
‘How did things get so twisted?’
I sighed in frustration. I knew Yu-geon was kind, but that didn’t change the fact that he was completely out of his mind.
Or maybe it was all an act. Now, I wasn’t sure what was real anymore.
All the things Yu-geon had done started to swirl in my head.
Baek Yu-geon, who had promised to keep my secret. Baek Yu-geon, who told me not to get close to Han-gyeol no matter who I fed on.
Baek Yu-geon, who insisted on following me because it was dangerous. Baek Yu-geon, who drank the creature’s blood even when it was too much for him.
And Baek Yu-geon, who willingly offered his own blood.
Could anyone be so obsessed with guiding that they’d do that? The more I thought about it, the more it felt like I was missing something important.
Smooch.
“If anyone’s the bad guy here, it’s probably you. Yu-geon didn’t do anything wrong.”
A soft touch landed on my cheek, snapping me out of my thoughts. The sudden kiss on the cheek left a tingling sensation that sent shivers down my spine.
When I looked at Han-gyeol, he just smiled lazily, as if nothing had happened.
Well, I guess it’s not a big deal—we used to do this as kids. But, did it feel like this back then too…?
