“Why didn’t I think of this before? Well, we’ve been like siblings for 15 years.”
He said this as if he understood, but his face showed he didn’t believe me at all.
“But don’t you think that might change over time? I’m confident I can make you see me as a man.”
He took a shallow drag from the cigarette, the smoke slipping out from between his lips like a mist.
His smile, deepened by the shadows, looked almost devilish, as if he was intentionally trying to lure someone in.
Normally, when other Espers smoked, the smell would make me wrinkle my nose, but his cigarette had a strange allure, perhaps because it was mixed with Han-gyeol’s wave, which clouded my mind.
The more assertive he became, the more conflicted I felt.
“You’re already looking scared, and we haven’t even started. Are you afraid of how I’m acting?”
Just as he said, I was more scared than excited by Han-gyeol’s confession. The feelings I had buried long ago had left traces that could easily reignite with the smallest spark.
Every time I faced those emotions, it became hard to breathe.
“Can’t we just stay like this?”
I lowered my head, feeling uncomfortable.
“This is fine, isn’t it? I don’t want things to change between us.”
“Not for me.”
Han-gyeol cut me off.
“I don’t like it like this, Sa-weol.”
His tone was so firm it almost felt sharp. He leaned on the railing, looking up at my face. Thankfully, my hair, blown by the wind, partly obscured my expression.
“I don’t want to just stand by anymore. It bothers me to see you with Yu-geon, and when I see you, I want to hold your hand, to embrace you.”
Just hearing those words made my heart race with anxiety. Even though I knew nothing would happen unless I said yes, it felt as if the situation was becoming all too real.
“You may not realize it, but I’ve been holding back a lot.”
“I haven’t.”
“Yeah, I can’t just force you to accept this one-sidedly.”
Despite having pushed so hard before, Han-gyeol suddenly seemed to back off, as if he were giving up.
“Just three times. Go on three dates with me.”
“Sunbae…”
“If you still don’t see me as a man after that, I’ll give up.”
“…”
I hadn’t expected such an offer. Just three times? I bit the inside of my cheek out of frustration.
“Can’t even do that?”
The wind blew again, scattering my hair. My discomfort must have been written all over my face.
His gaze felt so intense, almost burning through me. It was like a crack forming in a thick mask.
“I don’t change my mind once I’ve made a decision.”
“Good. You liked me before, didn’t you?”
“We might not be able to go back to being just friends.”
“Don’t worry. I won’t let that happen.”
Han-gyeol responded to my strained excuses without a moment’s hesitation. The longer the conversation went on, the more I felt cornered, while his face slowly broke into a smile.
Looking at him, I felt utterly defeated. Frustrated, I shot back at him.
“Why are you so confident that I’ll give in?”
“It’s not that.”
“Yes, it is. You’re acting like you know the future. I really don’t understand what you’re thinking.”
He laughed at my words as if he found them amusing. Most people would feel uncomfortable when I put up my defenses, but Han-gyeol always treated me with a calm, almost paternal attitude.
Even in this moment of confession, he was relaxed. Most people would be nervous when confessing to someone they like, but with Han-gyeol, I couldn’t shake the feeling that he was just teasing me.
“Is it because of these eyes?”
“Huh?”
He looked closely into my eyes as he spoke.
“Esper’s eye color can change when their emotions are stirred. Sometimes it happens with guides too.”
I already knew this. For example, Yu-geon’s eyes were usually brown but would take on a yellow hue when he was excited.
“My eyes… change? How?”
But I had never heard of that happening to me. I didn’t usually have strong emotional fluctuations, but if I had experienced such a phenomenon, it seemed like something that would have happened at least once since I became an awakened being.
“That’s a secret. I don’t want to tell anyone, not even you.”
“What…? You’re lying, right? This is a joke, isn’t it?”
“It’s not a lie. So, three dates, right?”
He deftly changed the subject, and I pressed my lips together in silence. His persistent gaze remained fixed on my face.
A date with him probably meant something like having a meal together and watching a movie, just like yesterday. If it were anyone else, it wouldn’t be a big deal. But Han-gyeol, who now saw me as a romantic interest—it still felt unfamiliar and unsettling. The idea of those three dates, with him, didn’t seem easy at all.
“If you don’t answer by the count of three, I’m going to kiss you.”
“Wait, hold on.”
“One.”
As I hesitated, he began counting. Panic set in, and I took a step back, eyeing him warily.
“Two.”
He stepped closer, his expression unreadable, leaving me unsure whether he was serious or just teasing.
“Two and a half.”
“Don’t joke around. I’m serious—I’ll get mad.”
“Go ahead, find out if I’m joking.”
With a declaration that sounded almost like a challenge, he placed both hands on the railing next to my shoulders, trapping me in his arms. His face slowly moved closer, and I could smell the deep musk and faint cigarette scent that tickled my nose. His dark green eyes locked onto mine, drawing me in as if I were falling into them.
“Three…”
“Alright, alright!”
I yelled out just as he was about to reach my lips.
We were so close that I could count each of his eyelashes. Even without speaking, the heat between us was palpable. The tension was so intense that I felt a cold sweat run down the back of my neck, knowing that the slightest movement would make us touch.
“Too bad. I was this close to kissing you.”
He whispered softly, sounding genuinely disappointed. He didn’t back away immediately, his gaze still hot and unwavering. When I gently pushed his shoulder, he finally retreated.
“Don’t play games like that.”
“Why do you always think I’m playing? I’m serious.”
“Whether you’re serious or not, if I give you permission… then you can do it.”
“Alright.”
He smiled, clearly pleased. His murmured words about looking forward to the day I’d give permission sent a ticklish sensation through my chest.
Those three dates I had agreed to—I realized I would have to brace myself for them.
* * *
After that day, Yu-geon suddenly stopped sticking to me like he used to. He didn’t talk to me, didn’t even glance my way. Not the next day, nor the day after that.
The image of his face, the one he made when I drained his blood to the point of collapse, kept flashing through my mind at odd moments. The empty, resigned look in his eyes and the way they trembled as if he’d been hurt—those images haunted me.
Despite what had happened, apart from not staying close to me, he acted as if nothing had changed. He trained at the center, went to the gate, and still socialized with others, laughing and eating like normal.
I found the situation puzzling.
‘I expected him to demand we break the pair as soon as he arrived.’
You couldn’t just unilaterally end a pair. Just like when it was formed, both parties had to agree, and you could only cancel it within the one-month revision period. After that, no matter how much you disliked it, you had to stay paired for two years. This rule was to prevent impulsive pairings.
Fortunately, we were still within that revision period. We had about ten days left.
The reason I treated him so harshly that day was to scare him into leaving. Seeing how obsessed he was with guiding, I doubted he would give up the pair easily, so I had pushed him by bringing up things I never wanted to remember.
While it didn’t seem to have had the desired effect, draining him of blood until he turned pale was enough to be threatening, even for an Esper with strong recovery abilities.
I wanted to suggest ending the pair right then and there, but if I brought it up now, Yu-geon might realize I had been trying to sabotage our pairing on purpose.
So I was waiting for him to speak up first.
“Ms. Gu Sa-weol, may I sit here?”
I was about to resume my meal after glancing at Yu-geon when another team member, Ji-han, appeared out of nowhere.
“Go ahead.”
“Thank you.”
He placed his tray across from mine. Ji-han, who was the same age as Han-gyeol and had joined the center at the same time, had a close bond with him. He also knew that Han-gyeol had taken care of me when I was younger.
Despite being a mental Esper, his tray was piled high with food. Ji-han had a lighthearted, mischievous nature, but there was no malice in him—he simply enjoyed telling amusing stories.
Most of the Alpha Team members felt uneasy around me because of my prickly attitude, so aside from Han-gyeol, Ji-han was the only one who approached me so casually.
“I thought maybe if I sat in front of you, he might come rushing over, but he didn’t.”
Ji-han glanced over at Yu-geon and mumbled.
“Did you fight with Yu-geon?”
“…”
I had expected people to start getting suspicious. In fact, they had probably noticed something was off from the first day. Given that Ji-han was close with Yu-geon, he had likely already asked him the same question he was now asking me.
“Why? Did Baek Yu-geon not tell you?”
The fact that he was probing like this suggested that Yu-geon hadn’t given him a satisfactory answer.
“Our Sa-weol is too sharp for her own good.”
Ji-han grinned, as if caught, resting his chin on his hands as he asked.
“The Phoenix Team’s guide mentioned to Yu-geon that you went to Captain Han-gyeol’s quarters the other day. When he heard that, he ran over like his hair was on fire, so I figured something must have happened. Did you two have a big fight?”
He asked with a playful smile, as if expecting some juicy details. But I had nothing to offer him.
“Not really.”
I continued eating, ignoring him.
“I smelled blood on Yu-geon.”
I paused for a moment as I reached for a piece of fish.
‘Damn it. Did he not even get treated?’
