After My Dead Ending

48.

“I didn’t hide it. I judged it was unnecessary for you to know about the aide’s personal matters.”

Erika added this after a bit of hesitation. I tried hard not to furrow my brows further.

“As you can see, Harry Fallen is very shy, so please continue to pretend not to know.”

Not knowing what to say, I just nodded. An awkward silence followed, and Erika glanced at me, as if asking if there was anything else I wanted to ask.

For some reason, I found her expression detestable. It was infuriating.

“…I’ll see you at the banquet.”

In the end, I moved first. I hurried past the two of them, almost as if fleeing. As I quickly walked out of the garden, with each step, I oddly felt more and more like I was being left alone.

‘Everyone’s better off without me.’

Feeling like even Erika had been taken away from me, I stopped abruptly, startled by my own thoughts.

‘Archie, Erika, the entire McFoy family can do just fine without me.’

The day’s constant annoyances had driven my emotions to an extreme. Before I knew it, I had ended up at the back door instead of the garden entrance where Glen was waiting.

Realizing this, I was overwhelmed with anger. Already frustrated with my cumbersome attire, I couldn’t muster the energy to go back to the garden entrance.

“Aisa?”

Someone called my name then. Startled like someone caught stealing, I jumped.

The surprise quickly turned into irritation, and I turned to glare at the person who had called my name. Only one person would call me like that.

“Why are you alone, where is sir Dogman?”

Despite my cautious demeanor, Kano approached me with concern. It was funny, considering he was always alone.

“What? Haven’t you gone home yet?”

The unexpected situation made my tone sharper than usual. He looked hurt and said,

“It seems you wanted me to leave.”

“It doesn’t matter to me either way.”

Ignoring my racing heart, I spoke nonchalantly. My attitude of indifference, as if I didn’t care whether he stayed or left, caused Kano to furrow his brows slightly.

“I was actually on my way to see you.”

“What do you want?”

Kano sighed lightly and then spoke.

“Landry’s is more thorough than I thought. I couldn’t find anything using the informants, so I plan to go to the capital myself.”

Now that I noticed, he was wearing a hooded robe, looking like someone about to leave.

“You, going to the capital yourself? You must really want the land you gave Morfolk as an engagement gift.”

When I feigned ignorance and changed the subject, Kano let out a small laugh. The sound of his deflating chuckle made me grip my fingers tightly without realizing it. He looked at me and then leisurely glanced around the garden before speaking again.

“Did you not know about Erika and Harry meeting?”

“What? You knew?”

“Both of them are your people, not mine. I’ve been regularly investigating, so I had to find out. They’ve been together for a while now. I’m surprised you didn’t know.”

Proud of spying on my close aides, I glared at him with a displeased expression.

Kano then laughed weakly and said,

“It seems you definitely lack talent in this area. You don’t seem interested, and above all, you’re too oblivious.”

“What?”

“I mean in terms of romantic feelings or love.”

“Hah! Who needs talent in that?”

I laughed at Kano’s childish remark like a villain and added, as if bored,

“Even if such talent exists, I don’t want it. I don’t need it.”

“Fine. If you don’t need such talent, then you don’t need it. In my opinion, it only takes one side to make it work anyway.”

Kano said this and laughed heartily. His unnecessary positivity was irritating. Admittedly, it was an area I wasn’t familiar with, so I decided to hold my tongue.

“What are you talking about… I don’t have time to joke around with you.”

By now, the sun was setting behind Kano, disappearing below the ridge beyond the fortress. The banquet would start soon.

“Are you going to the banquet for Diazi?”

Kano asked, noticing my elaborate attire.

“Yes.”

“It sounds boring.”

“It’s work, so fun doesn’t really matter.”

“Is work all there is? People need to rest and enjoy themselves too.”

“What are you trying to say?”

Frustrated by Kano’s constant banter, I finally snapped.

“It seems to me that you fear joy, pleasure, and happiness.”

“Why are you trying to analyze me so thoroughly today?”

I didn’t hide my displeasure and quickly denied it.

“And you’re completely wrong. I’ve never been afraid of those things. I just don’t need them.”

“Don’t need them, huh.”

Kano muttered as he took a step closer. The sudden reduction in distance made me instinctively step back.

“But you do need to clear your head.”

I couldn’t deny that. Especially on days like today when nothing seemed to go right, I needed to clear my head, which is why I was taking this walk, even if it felt like a failed attempt.

‘Though this walk seems to be ruined as well.’

I thought, remembering Erika and Harry’s interaction and now Kano testing me. I met Kano’s gaze.

“…”

His dark eyes suddenly felt menacing. He looked like a predator, and I flinched involuntarily.

“You overthink everything.”

Kano said. His red hair, illuminated by the setting sun, looked as if it were on fire.

“Don’t need them… But.”

“…”

“How do you know if you haven’t tried? You might not need them because you’ve never experienced them.”

It was a logical argument, yet also seemed like sophistry. But it was oddly convincing.

Even so, I wasn’t a naive child, and I could see through his ploy. Yet his expression was so serious, desperate, and intense that I was momentarily speechless.

Kano didn’t miss the opportunity.

“Why not give it a try?”

In an instant, he stepped closer. His familiar scent hit me—a sharp smell of chemicals from his work on the ship and dealing with shady matters. Sometimes, the scent of blood lingered too.

I blinked, and suddenly his thick eyebrows and deep eyes were closer than ever. He had bent down to my eye level as he stepped forward.

“See if you really don’t need such things.”

His lips moved right in front of my face. It all happened so quickly.

Before I knew it, his breath was on my face, and his lips were coming down towards mine. Kano’s head naturally tilted to the left.

Thump, thump, thump—

A wave of anxiety about the unknown surged through me. The compulsion that I shouldn’t cross this line was even stronger. My heart started to beat erratically.

There was no room for excuses. Kano was right. Somehow, I was afraid.

Just before our lips touched, I managed to turn my head away. Only after taking a deep breath did I realize I had been holding it.

Kano froze in place.

“…”

“This… this isn’t right. Get a grip. Why are you acting like this?”

Still turning my head to the side, I rambled. I couldn’t understand why things had escalated to this point.

I didn’t know why Kano was acting so desperate, and I couldn’t keep up with his pace. His blatant display of emotion was frightening.

Philip, Archie, Erika, Kano… why were they all acting like this towards me today? It felt so unfair.

‘I want to get out of here. Out of this place.’

Gradually, I regained control of my limbs.

‘Right now.’

I began to slowly back away, taking a step away from him. Until then, Kano remained motionless.

“I think, you’re the one…”

I spoke without looking at him, struggling to keep my voice steady.

“You’re the one who needs to clear your head. Just go back. If you stay any longer, you won’t be able to leave today.”

Without waiting to see his reaction, I turned away.

Gripping the hem of my cumbersome dress, I walked away quickly, almost fleeing. I didn’t stop until I felt I had left the garden behind.

I clung to a random pillar and took deep breaths. For the first time in a while, I felt like a fugitive. A wave of sorrow washed over me.

‘Maybe it’s because I wasted time having breakfast this morning.’

Considering the bad luck that followed, it made sense.

I tried to ruffle my hair in frustration, but the dangling jewels caught between my fingers made it impossible. Today was truly like a dream, and if it was a dream, it was a nightmare.

‘This is why people shouldn’t do things they’re not used to. What was with the breakfast? What was with trying to lift my spirits and taking a walk?’

Surprisingly, the sun was only just setting, and the unlucky day wasn’t over yet. At the final banquet for Diazi, I couldn’t hide my low spirits, unbefitting a family head.

“The head of the McFoy family doesn’t look well, so let’s call it a night.”

In the end, Milan Diazi stood up midway, citing my poor complexion.

It was incredibly embarrassing. The thought that I couldn’t even carry out my duties as the head of the family filled me with self-reproach. At the same time, a headache seemed to pierce through my skull.

‘I still have Antoinette. I’ll feel better if I hold Antoinette and sleep.’

With a determined face, I took Antoinette from Norma and headed straight to my bedroom.

Norma looked worried and said something, but I couldn’t remember what because of the tsunami of self-reproach and headache. My mind was filled only with thoughts of Antoinette and my bed.

I was ready to throw myself onto the bed the moment I flung the bedroom door open.

“…”

However, I was greeted by a strange sense of déjà vu.

It was a feeling both familiar and foreign at the same time. Something that shouldn’t be here and couldn’t be here.

‘What a day.’

I instinctively realized the source of the déjà vu.

I stopped and glanced back at Lord Dogman, who was looking at me and the bedroom alternately, confused. It seemed only I felt the déjà vu.

In my arms, Antoinette perked up her ears and lifted her head. Her gaze was fixed on the inside of the bedroom, towards the wide balcony.

“…”

“What’s wrong, my Lord?”

Sir Dogman asked, seeing me awkwardly pause at the door. I spoke slowly, my eyes still on the balcony.

“Glen.”

Hearing his name after a long time, Glen tensed.

“Yes, my Lord?”

“I’m very sensitive today. Don’t guard the door; make sure no one comes near this floor, let alone this room. Until I call, no one comes close. I’ll change on my own.”

Without waiting for Glen’s response, I stepped into the bedroom.

Thud—

Finally, the large bedroom door closed. The silence in the room was palpable, and the sound of the door closing seemed louder than ever.

TL/N; Guys Im soo soo sorry about my fucked up translations. I’m really sorry I have been out of it and I was really sick. I’m so sorry I never got to proofread it after my editor quit. I’m sorry, I’ll be editing those chapters now. Please don’t worry I have also changed the names too. I’m so sorry guys, just please forgive me for my stupidity im sorry

when I am done with editing work Ill upload a new chapter.