Chapter 2: Something’s Wrong with My Account
Even though I had lived in Seoul for almost twenty years, everything felt unfamiliar now.
I hid my awkwardness as I boarded the subway after a long time and got off at Sillim Station.
“Nothing seems to have changed here.”
I muttered a brief comment as I emerged from Exit 5 of Sillim Station and headed towards the motel I had checked in advance.
“Alone?”
“Yes. Just me.”
“Head to Room 506.”
The ahjumma, who appeared to be the manager, handed me a card key and a toiletry pouch.
Though it was my first time at a motel, I casually accepted the pouch and pressed the button for the 5th floor in the cramped elevator.
Ding.
As the elevator door opened with a creak, I walked briskly towards Room 506.
Looking at the card key in my hand, I became puzzled.
“How do I open the door?”
While contemplating whether to go back down and ask the manager, the elevator door opened again, and a middle-aged couple appeared.
“Dear, isn’t it risky to come to a place like this in broad daylight?”
“It’s safer during the day. Don’t worry, come on in.”
As the man swiped the card key on the door, it made a ringing sound, and the door opened. The two hurriedly entered.
“Ah, so that’s how you do it.”
Following suit, I opened the door to Room 506 and encountered yet another obstacle inside.
“How do I turn on the lights?”
But with just a simple survey, I, who had endured four years on a perilous ocean fishing ship, persevered.
As I inserted the card key into the unidentified object on the left side of the entrance, bright lights illuminated the room.
“Anyone would think I just got released from prison.”
Looking around, my eyes fell on the neatly arranged, pristine white bedding on a large bed.
Feeling thirsty, I hesitated for a moment as I opened the mini-fridge placed under the TV.
Inside the fridge, along with a 500mL bottle of water, were two small cans.
“There’s corn silk tea and plum tea too. Can I just have them?”
After a brief pause, I casually opened the can of corn silk tea and gulped it down in one go.
“If they want money, they’ll ask for it.”
Tossing the empty can into the trash, I jumped onto the bed and lay down.
“Ah… This feels like heaven.”
Although the smell of cigarettes and some unknown disinfectant lingered in the air, compared to the cramped cabin of a fishing boat, this bedroom felt like paradise.
Beep Beep.
“I did come back, after all…”
The sound of a car horn outside beyond the window covered with black curtains reminded me that I was indeed back in Seoul.
Then something peculiar caught my eye.
“Why is there a mirror there?”
In the mirror hanging from the ceiling, my reflection lying on the bed was visible.
Healthy, tanned skin, well-defined muscles. Even an aura of masculinity exuded from my appearance.
The skinny, clueless boy with sunken eyes from four years ago was nowhere to be seen.
“I’ve changed a lot too.”
It felt strange. How often would I have looked into a mirror during the daily war-like life on the fishing ship?
Anyway, after four years, I had successfully cleared off the debt of 300 million won and returned to Seoul with confidence.
The excruciating four years of life on the fishing boat seemed to flash by like a distant memory.
The ocean fishing ship that departed from Busan passed through Japan and headed towards the South Pacific. It seemed like we set sail on an unlucky day. Right from the first day of departure, the wind was unusual.
I recalled the times when I had been on small boats or pleasure cruises as a child and boasted to myself that I was someone who didn’t get seasick.
Looking back now, I had been unbelievably arrogant back then. The severe seasickness made everything feel like hell, and I occasionally felt the urge to just jump into the sea.
Fortunately, I managed to overcome seasickness faster than I had thought.
There was hardly any concept of teaching on the ship. They only taught the basics, and the rest you had to figure out for yourself. If you weren’t doing something you were supposed to, you’d get cursed at without mercy.
I had never experienced such a severe illness before even after working night shifts in a press factory, yet I fell ill for the first time.
My whole body ached as if stabbed with knives, and I was tormented by a chilling fever and chills.
But there was no sympathy on the ship.
“The darn gentlemen…”
No one cared if you were in pain or showed any consideration. Even when I staggered and nearly collapsed while pulling up the net, I was scolded not to exaggerate.
Even if you vomited from seasickness, you couldn’t let go of the net.
I felt a sense of disillusionment and bitterness about what I was doing there.
As I still couldn’t get my act together, anger surged towards myself, and I gritted my teeth and hit my head against the deck in frustration.
That’s how I lost it.
“I can’t endure this while being sane. Damn it.”
With closed eyes, I enjoyed the luxury of the comfortable bed, solely for my own sake.
There’s no such thing as resting on a ship. Since boarding the ocean fishing ship, I’ve come to realize just how precious even the shortest breaks are. Anyone who hasn’t experienced non-stop work can’t understand how tough it is.
The thought that I could die right here crossed my mind involuntarily. Have you ever been hit by fish fragments while you were absentmindedly untangling the nets? It was disgusting, but it also hurt like hell.
The bedrooms on the ship were no better. About three meters in length and width? Six crew members slept in this cramped space. Unfortunately, luck wasn’t on my side, and there wasn’t a spare bed. For a long time, I had to sleep on the bare floor with just a sleeping bag.
“I need to take a bath.”
I sprang up from the bed and grabbed the toiletry set from the counter before heading into the bathroom. It took me some time to figure out how to turn on the bathroom light, but after some trial and error, I succeeded.
“But why are the walls and doors made of glass here?”
I scratched my head at the incomprehensible bathroom layout, where the bedroom was clearly visible from inside. The neatly-maintained bathtub, sink, and bidet caught my eye. Filled with emotion, I hung the toiletry pouch on my hip and stood there for a while.
“Yeah, the bathroom area should be at least like this.”
One of the most challenging things about being on the ship was the issue of taking showers. Due to the limited supply of fresh water on board, crew members who took showers were often scolded. Often, we had to make do with washing ourselves with seawater, which was not ideal.
Shampoos and soaps didn’t lather properly with seawater, and as a result, I didn’t feel clean at all. Soon, my skin started to develop various troubles.
But what could I do? It was just the way it was.
In the middle of the vast ocean, surrounded by nothing but sea, there was nowhere to escape.
Enjoying a civilized bath under the powerful stream of the shower, I emerged from the bathroom, covering only my lower body with a towel like a civilized person.
Upon noticing a bathrobe hanging on the coat rack, I paused. “Is this charged too?” I thought coolly now that I wasn’t even a debtor anymore. Shrugging it off, I wrapped the robe around me and indulged in the refreshing feeling that enveloped my entire body as I sank back onto the soft bed.
“Ah… This is like heaven.” My mouth involuntarily curled upwards in contentment at the fresh yet relaxed sensation.
But the pleasant feeling was short-lived. As my body relaxed, various thoughts weighed heavily on me.
“How should I live from now on?”
The four years spent on the ocean fishing ship had completely reset my life from society’s perspective. It had been a long time since I’d heard from my few remaining foster brothers or former colleagues.
With no home, no car, I felt lost about what to do with my life.
“I don’t want to chase money anymore.”
Watching the morning sun rise beyond the horizon, I made numerous resolutions.
The ocean had taught me how insignificant I was and forced me to view my entire life from a distance. It has humbled me endlessly.
Blinded by money, I had incurred unbearable debts and boarded the ocean fishing ship to take responsibility for my actions.
Of course, I had no regrets about boarding the ship; it was a decision made after careful consideration.
Still, I had spent more than half of my supposed-to-be vibrant twenties on the ship.
From now on, I want to live a life solely for myself, not for money.
“What is the life I want?”
“What do I want to do right now?”
I contemplated seriously as I looked at my reflection in the ceiling mirror.
“A peaceful and harmonious home?”
Of course, it was still a dream that I longed for and desired.
But now, I understand.
That simply having money isn’t enough.
And I’ve learned this through the challenging life on the ship and the vastness of the ocean.
I’ve realized that the meaning of life is something that I give to myself, not others.
“Let’s not rush things, Dae-woon. Deciding on life is a big deal.”
Rather than grandiose dreams, I needed to focus on what I needed to do tomorrow.
“For now, I need to find a place to live, as for a car… Well, it’s not urgent, so I’ll pass. A job… I’ll take my time with that.”
Thanks to the unexpected great catch on the last ocean fishing trip, I had received a substantial bonus.
As a result, I managed to pay off all my debts and even secured enough funds to live comfortably for a while.
“But it’s still not enough. I need to save as much money as possible.”
Unlike before, where I didn’t appreciate the value of money, I now had to consider every penny precious.
Suddenly, something flashed through my mind, and I jumped up from the bed, shouting out loud.
“Cryptocurrency accounts!”
At first, even the sound of ‘crypto’ sent shivers down my spine, and I swore never to deal with cryptocurrencies again.
But separate from that, I remembered that I still had some leftover coins in my neglected cryptocurrency account.
“How crazy was I back then?”
At the time when I was making trades as if it were a game and moving tens of millions of won, I didn’t care about a few hundred won.
“But things are different now. With just a few tens of thousands of won, I could cover a month’s rent or so.”
Reflecting once again on past mistakes, I took out my phone and installed the forgotten app.
“Coin Exchange ‘Coinance’.”
It was the largest cryptocurrency exchange in the world. It was also the exchange where I used to trade futures.
Looking at the app after four years, everything felt unfamiliar. I had to break a sweat to recover the forgotten ID and password that was already buried in my memory. After overcoming various authentication procedures, I nervously opened my account.
[Total Value (BTC)]
0.02 BTC = ₩453,212
“…Quite miserable.”
The various altcoins I had collected like a coin collector had shrunk to one-tenth of their value in four years.
“But still, ₩450,000 is something.”
Since I hadn’t expected much, I exchanged the TRON coin for Korean won on a Korean exchange where fiat withdrawals were possible.
“I should treat myself to something delicious with this.”
As I hummed a tune in the joy of newfound money, another forgotten memory resurfaced.
“Oh! Come to think of it, there was something on the coin list, wasn’t there…?”
Four years ago, I vaguely remembered buying some obscure altcoin at the persuasion of a popular YouTuber.
“That’s still my hard-earned money. I have to retrieve it somehow.”
Honestly, it seemed quite bothersome, but time was all I had to spare.
I installed the Coin List app and, after going through the same miscellaneous authentication procedures, I finally succeeded in logging in.
“Please let there be at least ₩550,000 left. Just enough to fill it up to ₩1,000,000.”
I said that, but I didn’t even dare to hope. If I couldn’t remember what coin I had bought, it must have been one of the most insignificant altcoins among insignificant altcoins.
With eyes devoid of any emotion, I pressed the ‘Wallet’ tab.
“What, what’s this…”
I blinked repeatedly, wondering if I had seen it wrong.
My mouth hung open; I was utterly speechless.
