I blinked at the absurd words coming from the youngest’s mouth. As my vision cleared, I could see his face properly.
“Jae-hee, did you get younger?”
“What’s wrong with you, hyung? I think you’ve really lost it.”
I stared blankly at his youthful, almost baby-faced appearance. Jae-hee clicked his tongue and shook his head before rushing out of my room, calling for Kwon Ha-jun.
I didn’t have time to question the youngest’s unusually friendly behavior, considering he had been sulking and ignoring me yesterday. I quickly looked around.
The hard mattress under my butt wasn’t the plush double king-size mattress I had in my new place. The bed was now a third of its previous size.
The room was small, with dingy, peeling wallpaper covering the walls. The floor was literal yellow linoleum.
I finally realized where I was.
This was the d-mn semi-basement dorm we stayed in during our early debut days when we were a failing idol group.
‘This can’t be happening.’
I slapped my cheek hard, wondering if I was dreaming. It hurt like hell. It wasn’t a dream.
I hurried to the mirror. Reflected in it was a version of myself that looked no older than my early twenties. My eyes in the mirror trembled slightly.
Semi-basement, youth, debut day.
It seemed like I had gone back in time.
Back to the worst period of my life, the time when we were a failing idol group. Or rather, before our debut when we were about to walk that failing path.
First things first, I needed to figure out what that system window was all about. What was “initial intention”? And why had I come back?
“Status window.”
Hesitantly, I whispered as quietly as possible, hoping it would appear. The blue, semi-transparent window I had seen before popped up again.
[A project to regain the original intention for idols who have lost their original intention!]
[Participant: Yoon Eden]
[Info]
[Age: 20
Position: Main Rapper, Leader
Skills: Rap, Lyric Writing, Composing, Producing]
[Initial Intention: 94]
[※ Initial Intention decreases based on behavior and speech inappropriate for an idol, depending on severity.]
[※ If Initial Intention reaches 0, you start over!]
[※ To complete the project, you must meet the essential condition.]
[Essential Condition – You disappointed 30,000 fans, now make 30 million fans happy! (0/30,000,000)]
What the… Did it really send me back to my debut to make me regain my passion?
And why do I have to make 30 million fans happy just because I disappointed 30,000? That’s a hundred times more!
“D-mn it, my Cheongdam-dong house! My million-dollar royalties! My savings account! My Ferrari!”
I clutched my curly hair, rolling around on the floor in frustration.
All my wealth gone in a single day! I didn’t even get to spend a night in my 3 billion won house! I hadn’t even spent one night in my 3 billion won house!
[Foul language detected.]
[Initial Intention -2]
Even in the midst of all this, my Initial Intention was steadily decreasing. I grimaced as I felt the sharp pain coursing through me.
Can’t they cut me some slack? How am I supposed to not curse right now?
“Wow, our leader must have had one hell of a prophetic dream. Did we make it big? Can we take this as a sign we’re gonna hit it big?”
The oldest member, applying a face mask in the morning, poked me as I writhed on the floor.
Big hit? More like a huge flop. Thanks to our clueless company, it’ll be at least three more years before we make it big. And…
“What’s with the sudden chumminess… Not that it matters.”
I frowned and instinctively snapped back, then scratched my cheek, diverting my words.
Oh right, the drinking incident hasn’t happened yet since it’s pre-debut.
“Can’t we even pretend to be friendly as members? Geez, such a jerk.”
Seo Yeo-hyun shook his head and clicked his tongue as he left the room.
Unbelievable. Who’s the real jerk here?
I went through so much trouble making sure his lackluster singing, dancing, and rapping didn’t ruin our tracks and performances!
It all started when he got drunk during a gathering with the members and told me off for hurting people’s self-esteem. I only speak bluntly so they get the shock needed to improve. What did I do so wrong? Do I have to consider everyone’s delicate feelings now?
Anyway, having our debut stage just a few hours away was a problem.
Although I remembered the formation and movements from performing the debut song at concerts and fan events, some choreography had been simplified over time, so it wasn’t safe to go on stage like this.
As a rookie from a small agency just stepping into the entertainment industry, pre-recording for music shows was out of the question. Any mistake would be broadcast live, immortalized on national television. Imagine screwing up right from the debut stage.
“Hey, Dobby! Do you have the choreography video on your phone?”
I called out to our main dancer, Kim Dobin, as I entered the living room. He quickly came over, handing me his phone with the video already playing while grumbling.
“It’s not Dobby, it’s Kim Dobin. Stop changing the name my grandfather gave me to that of a house-elf, hyung.”
Wow, this is surreal. Kim Dobin, who used to silently endure being called Dobby, was now retorting back at me.
Looking at how the members were treating me, it was clear I had indeed gone back to the past.
I scratched my head, turned up the volume, and played the video. Thanks to my experience, it didn’t take long for me to re-learn the choreography after watching the video a few times.
“How about we run through it once here before we go?”
With the music show just hours away and no time to visit the practice room, we coordinated our moves roughly in the living room. Wiping off the sweat, I collapsed onto the floor.
“Wow, our debut stage is just a few hours away, but it doesn’t feel real at all.”
“Thanks to Yeo-hyun hyung’s face, our music show video might hit a million views on YouTube, right?”
Unlike the faces of my members, full of excitement and nervousness for the debut, I, the only one who knew the future of this group, could only feel indifferent.
A lousy song and poor hair, makeup, and outfit choices would overshadow even those faces.
I remembered the music video with its cheap quality and dismal view count.
The song and styling would be the same, so there was no miracle that could suddenly make us blow up, unlike the past.
‘But what does it mean when it says if Initial Intention drops to 0, it starts over? Does that mean it resets to 100? If so, this Initial Intention deduction would be meaningless.’
As I stared blankly into space, lost in thought, an alert chimed, and a blue status window popped up in front of me.
[Lifeless eyes detected.]
[Initial Intention -1]
Feeling utterly baffled, I continued staring ahead with hollow eyes, and my Initial Intention kept dropping.
Alarmed by the seemingly endless status windows popping up like a loading error, I felt a stinging pain as if pricked by needles multiple times.
Apparently, losing Initial Intention also brought physical pain.
Blinking back tears and regaining focus, the status windows finally disappeared.
In an instant, my Initial Intention had dropped by 10 points.
This was too much. Staring blankly also cost me Initial Intention points for “lifeless eyes”?
As the time for our music show schedule approached, we followed the manager assigned to us during our debut period, leaving the dorm and squeezing into a cramped car.
At this time, we were in such a poor environment that we couldn’t even dream of having a celebrity van, let alone a Carnival.
Typical of a small company that had just entered the entertainment business and had never even managed actors.
“Oh, it’s really cramped I could die.”
[Forbidden phrase ‘oh, it’s really’ detected.]
[Initial Intention -1]
[Profanity detected.]
[Initial Intention -2]
Ouch, isn’t this too much? If ‘Damn, it’s so’ is a forbidden phrase, what am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to live without speaking?
***
We completed our debut stage without any mistakes. But, just like before, there was no reaction. We were labeled as a “failed idol group” again.
Moreover, Initial Intention 100 was easier to lose than I thought.
Just staring blankly at the sky would cost me points for “lifeless eyes,” saying something like “oh, really” would deduct points, and even casual everyday profanities like “d-mn” or “sh-t” would make me lose points. There was no way to maintain it.
In just three days, after appearing on only three music shows, I had managed to drop my Initial Intention to 0.
Even senior idols talking behind my back about how I lacked the enthusiasm of a rookie was a point deduction. How could I help it when I had the mindset of a seven-year veteran idol?
I could never get used to the stinging sensation that accompanied the loss of Initial Intention.
‘Oh, nothing’s happening?’
So this cursed Initial Intention can be ignored, then.
As I kicked off my shoes in the entrance and crossed the living room to enter my room, I suddenly found myself gasping for air, clutching my throat, and collapsing to the floor.
I couldn’t breathe at all. Drool dripped from my open mouth with rough breaths.
Kwon Ha-jun quickly came to support me, slapping my cheeks to keep me conscious.
“Eden! Yoon Eden! Get a hold of yourself!”
“Why is he suddenly like this? Call an ambulance, quick!”
My consciousness slowly faded. The last thing I saw before everything went black was the worried faces of my members.
I didn’t know how much time had passed.
“……Hyung. Eden hyung!”
I opened my eyes to the sound of someone calling me. The ceiling I saw before collapsing came into view.
The only difference was that I had collapsed in the living room, but now I was lying in a room.
Thinking my members must have moved me, I sighed in relief, only to be pierced by the bright voice of the youngest member.
“Hyung, how can you sleep in on our debut day? Your mental strength is really something.”
“……What?”
My voice trembled involuntarily. I hastily checked my phone for the date.
August 8th. REVE’s debut day.
Could it be that when they said ‘start over,’ they meant……
“D-mn it, no way!”
[Profanity detected.]
[Initial Intention -2]
As soon as I cursed while clutching my head, the system quickly deducted points, bringing pain along with it.
Looking blankly at the Initial Intention reset to 100, I screamed in frustration.
“Get lost! Just get out of my sight!”
“Hyung…? What’s wrong? Are you nervous about our debut today?”
Ryu Jae-hee called out to me cautiously, but I was too distraught to care about the youngest at the moment.
The overwhelming fear of being trapped in this endlessly repeating time gripped me. I feared I might go insane being stuck in this moment forever.
I was going crazy with frustration.
I hadn’t done drugs, gambled, drunk-driven, or gone to room salons like other seniors or juniors.
Why was this happening to me? Why, why! What did I do to deserve this?
All I wanted was to make the music I liked. Was that such a huge crime?
I didn’t even remember how I ended up on the debut stage. My whole body ached from the constant stabbing pain.
In my stage outfit, holding a microphone, a red warning blinked ominously on the status window in front of me.
Whether because I was out of my mind and staring blankly at nothing, or muttering constant profanities, my Initial Intention was now less than 10.
As Kwon Ha-jun’s part ended and mine approached, only rough breaths came out of my mouth instead of rap lyrics.
The members, noticing my unusual state, looked at me with alarmed faces.
[A mistake on stage has been detected.]
[Initial Intention -7]
[⚠ Initial Intention has reached 0! ⚠]
As the song reached its climax, a sudden, more intense pain overwhelmed me. The microphone slipped from my hand.
Thud—
A loud crashing sound and sharp noise echoed across the stage. I felt my body slowly tilt.
My vision gradually blurred. I could hear the MR and the noise in my ears, and I felt someone shaking me urgently, but I couldn’t open my eyes.
With the excruciating pain piercing through my heart, my consciousness completely plunged into darkness.
It was my second regression.
