OCB Chapter 3

After the long, grueling stretch of overtime, it was finally a completely free weekend—the reward for finishing the project by the skin of her teeth. She’d ambitiously planned to sleep for 24 hours straight, but her stomach had other ideas, waking her up at 4 PM with a loud growl. Struggling to lift her puffy eyes, she fumbled around for her phone on the bedside table. Two texts from Seongchan had come in.

[The food was good. Thanks.]

[I’ll make it up to you.]

Both messages had been sent at 1 AM, while she was fast asleep. Love really was powerful. Just like her, Seongchan had pulled three all-nighters for work, yet had gone out to dinner without a trace of fatigue when that person called. Maybe seeing her even once was sweeter than catching up on missed sleep. Even though his texts were as stiff and curt as always, they still gave her butterflies and brought a small smile to her lips.

“Guess he had a good time.”

All that effort to hide his exhaustion, to polish him up for the date, to pull strings for the restaurant—felt worth it. She beamed with pride as a loyal one-sided-love supporter. But the joy quickly faded, replaced by a wave of gloom when she thought of her own situation.

“Must be nice… going on dates and all.”

She muttered to herself and, out of habit, opened Jaeyoon’s SNS. His feed was as calm and serene as ever. Photos of coffee from that day, a dog gleefully running, and ever-changing skies. His posts always carried the scent of warmth, revealing the gentle way he saw the world.

A few new photos had been uploaded in the days she’d been too busy with overtime to check.

“Looks like he went for a walk in the park.”

Pictures from a nearby park filled the feed—trees tinted in bright yellows and reds, thick blankets of fallen leaves, even a squirrel up in a tree. One picture stood out: a mother duck followed by a long line of ducklings.

“Oh wow, she had babies. A lot of them too.”

Following his daily life like this made the world seem a little more beautiful. The proof? She was smiling again without even realizing it.

“…Huh?”

As she reached the last photo, Hyerin slowly brushed her fingers across the screen with a strange look. It was a picture of Jaeyoon taken from behind, standing in front of a pond. That alone was unusual—he never posted photos of himself.

The light blue top he was wearing caught her eye. She recognized it immediately—it was the one she’d given him as a gift. Seriously, it wasn’t even that big a deal, and yet she couldn’t stop smiling. There was no deeper meaning to it, but it still made her happy to see him using something she gave. Telling herself it was just that, she tapped the red heart on the post and sluggishly climbed out of bed.

The house was completely still. 4 PM on a weekend? Of course no one was home—everyone in her family was the active type. Her parents were probably out hiking or traveling, and her brother Hyungwon was no doubt playing basketball with friends in the neighborhood. Just as she was thinking maybe she’d go out to soak in some sun for once—

[6 PM, Awu Bar?]

A short and to-the-point message from her longtime friend, Irae. Any thoughts of healing walks through the park were immediately soaked in the idea of alcohol. What better way to de-stress than drinking your face off with a friend?

[Deal.]

After replying with a short “deal,” Hyerin quickly showered and sat in front of her vanity to get ready. Even after sleeping so much, dark circles lingered beneath her eyes. She masked the fatigue with heavy makeup and even put on a bright red lipstick—one bold enough that, if she wore it to work, her coworkers would probably ask if she’d eaten a rat. Ugh. Was this what being worn down by society felt like? It was the same makeup she used to wear often just a year ago, yet it felt out of place now—too much.

“Jung Jaeyoon probably wouldn’t like this.”

He crept into her thoughts that way—unexpectedly. She’d never met any of the girls he dated in person, but based on glimpses from photos and bits she’d heard through Hyungwon, it was easy to guess. He likely liked girls who were just like him—clear, soft, warm smiles, the kind of person who looked natural in a fluttering dress in the wind. Someone who’d blend right into the tranquil landscapes he often photographed.

Hyerin stared at her reflection. She and Jaeyoon felt like they existed in different color palettes. He was subtle, like that pale blue shirt she gave him. She was bold, like the black clothes she wore so often. They didn’t match.

A pang of frustration hit her. Almost defiantly, she layered on more lipstick and put on her shortest, tightest outfit. Her long-running crush was starting to chip away at her sense of self, and she didn’t like it.

Still, once she finished getting ready, a strange sense of confidence kicked in. Tossing on a tiny handbag that barely fit her wallet and lipstick, she checked the time.

5 PM. Still had about 30 minutes. A golden weekend after endless overtime—she didn’t want to waste a single boring minute. Without hesitation, she headed to Hyungwon’s room. His PC was high-spec and smooth—unlike her own, which lagged constantly.

But as she swung the door open, an unexpected voice caught her off guard.

“What the—! Knock, will you? Geez…”

Hyungwon was lounging on his bed—clearly not out playing basketball like she’d assumed. And next to him, of all people, was Jaeyoon. Hyerin blinked, flustered, then awkwardly stepped inside.

“Sorry, I thought you were out playing.”

“I’m leaving. Just chilling for a bit.”

As Hyerin walked in fully, Hyungwon gave her a quick once-over and frowned.

“Where are you going?”

“Oh, drinks with Irae.”

“In that skirt? What is it, summer? You’re basically flashing your—”

“I’m wearing shorts underneath, okay?”

“Same difference.”

As always, Hyungwon, ever the teacher, was conservative.

“Come back early. And no mixing with random guys.”

Knowing Hyerin’s stubborn streak, he added that as a parting shot and looked away. His eyes were off her now, but Jaeyoon’s weren’t. He was still staring. Feeling strangely self-conscious, Hyerin rubbed her thigh and joked,

“Well, if he’s hotter than Jung Jaeyoon, maybe.”

She waved her hand at him as if to say “ignore me” and booted up the computer.

“Just gonna play for 30 minutes. You guys do your thing. I won’t bother you.”

Hyungwon raised a brow.

“You don’t even have any games on here.”

“Yes, I do! That monster-raising one—”

“Deleted it. I don’t play it anymore, and it was taking up space. Thought you gave up on it too.”

Sure enough, her cute little dragon icon was nowhere to be found on the desktop. Useless. Hyungwon shrugged.

“Play Minesweeper or something.”

“I’m getting online, obviously.”

She kept her eyes locked on the screen, moving the mouse around, but Jaeyoon’s gaze still burned.

‘Calling me cute… just means you don’t see me as a woman, right?’

‘Sorry.’

Their last meeting flashed through her mind. In the end, she’d been rejected—again. Coupled with her never-ending overtime, the stress had been overwhelming. But it wasn’t anything special. Maybe Jaeyoon just thought she was sulking. Or maybe he still felt bad. Hyerin hated awkwardness and lingering tension, so she turned her head and faced him.

“What? Got something to say?”

She tilted her head, voice cocky and casual. He gave a small, familiar smile before answering.

“Just feels like it’s been a while.”

Hyerin stared at him for a moment and sighed. Maybe she had missed that face—one that kept surfacing in her head even when she was busy. Her chest felt tight.

“Well, I’ve been working late a lot.”

Her tone was indifferent as she turned away again, clicking the mouse. His gaze still lingered on her profile, but he said nothing. In the room filled with Hyungwon and Jaeyoon’s occasional chatter, Hyerin scrolled through random articles, passing the time.

Just as she was thinking it was time to leave, Hyungwon brought up a name she knew all too well.

“Hey, you remember that weathercaster I mentioned? Seo Hyeyoung.”

Whether she was at work or home, Seongchan’s girlfriend’s name kept following her. Hyerin glanced over. Hyungwon was holding up his phone to Jaeyoon, who glanced at it briefly, then gave a small nod.

“Right? She’s freaking pretty, huh?”

Hyungwon grinned, fishing for agreement. Jaeyoon looked again and said casually,

“She’s pretty. Nice smile.”

The moment he said it, Hyeyoung’s face flashed through Hyerin’s mind. Totally different vibe from hers—soft eyes, charming smile. Her voice was cute too. No wonder men liked her. No wonder Seongchan felt insecure.

Hyungwon kept showing photos, his face lit up with enthusiasm.

“She’s exactly my type. Doesn’t she look a bit like that girl you dated in college? Innocent and curvy. The dream, right?”

Hyerin thought, So this is how guys talk when we’re not around, and though she wanted to walk away, her ears stayed sharp. She glanced at Jaeyoon. He looked at another photo and gave a quiet chuckle before saying,

“What guy doesn’t like curves?”

The easy tone sounded foreign coming from him. Of course guys were interested in women’s bodies—but hearing him say it felt weird. It rubbed her the wrong way. Irritated, Hyerin snorted and shoved her chair back, walking over to Jaeyoon, who was lounging on the bed.

He tilted his head, curious. Hyungwon, still glued to his phone, barely glanced up. Without hesitation, Hyerin grabbed Jaeyoon’s hand, placed it on her chest, and pressed it down firmly.

“Then why don’t you like me, you bastard?”

His limp hand conformed to her curves. As the warmth of his palm began to register, his eyes went wide and his mouth dropped open in shock. Hyungwon, finally realizing what was happening, bolted upright.

“Hey! Joo Hyerin!”

Unbothered by the shout, Hyerin kept her gaze locked on Jaeyoon’s shaking eyes. When’s the last time I saw this face? Probably not since that kiss when they were six.

Satisfied, she smiled slightly and turned away.

“I’m coming home late.”

She strode out of the room coolly, leaving behind a stunned Jaeyoon and an enraged Hyungwon, whose voice rang out after her.

“Are you out of your mind?! Joo Hyerin! Stop right there!”

She ignored him, slipped on her heels, and stepped outside, humming under her breath. Seeing Jaeyoon that rattled—it felt good. Like she’d finally landed a blow of her own.

She walked with a light step until a rustling sound beneath her feet made her pause. It wasn’t just a leaf. She lifted her shoe and found the brittle, crumpled remains of a cicada. Just days ago, they’d been crashing into streetlamps like mad. But summer was really over now.

She kept staring at that inevitable death—until someone called her name.

“Hey! Joo Hyerin!”

Hyungwon suddenly appeared and grabbed her by the arm, turning her around. Caught off guard, she narrowed her eyes.

“What the hell? Why’d you come out?”

Maybe he had run down the stairs—he was breathless, gripping her wrist tightly, his face flushed red as he finally shouted,

“Just stop it, will you?!”

Hyungwon was clearly furious. And there was no doubt it was because of what she’d just done to Jaeyoon. Sure, she knew it was a bit over the line, but his shout—void of even a hint of teasing—threw her off.

“You and him, it’s been twenty years. Do you not remember when he said he wanted a little sister like you? What kind of guy wants to screw a girl he sees as his actual little sister?!”

Little sister. His sharp words jabbed right where it hurt. Even Hyerin’s calm expression began to crack.

“Ha… Well, I never agreed to that. Since when did Jung Jaeyoon say we share blood?”

“Joo Hyerin! Wake the hell up. The way a guy treats a girl he cherishes like a sister isn’t the same as how he treats someone he wants. Jaeyoon—he’s not your damn prince charming. Just listen to me for once, will you?!”

His grip on her wrist was tightening. She’d never seen him this angry before. But Hyerin yanked her arm away roughly, shaking her head.

“Who said I wanted a prince charming…?! And you—stop treating me like I’m a kid!”

“……”

“I’ll be the one to feel disappointed, not you! I’m an adult. Jaeyoon oppa’s an adult. What are you so worried about? And even without you barging in like this, I already know. I know he doesn’t see me that way… as a woman.”

Her voice cracked at the end. Hyerin bit her lip and fanned her eyes, which were growing red and wet.

“Just… let me have my breakdown, okay?”

“What?”

She glanced down at the dead cicada at her feet and spoke again.

“Because what I’m doing right now—it’s like how a cicada thrashes before it dies. Just let me be.”

She swallowed the surge of emotions and gave a bitter laugh. Just earlier, she had laughed in satisfaction. But now, it felt like she was standing at the edge of a cliff. Like she really had become a cicada—lost and panicking, not knowing where to fly in its final moments.

“No matter how much noise it makes… when summer ends, it dies anyway.”

With that quiet line, Hyerin walked past Hyungwon.

He didn’t chase after her. He didn’t grab her. He didn’t say a word.

As it was Saturday evening, the bustling street food stall was filled with the hearty laughter of the two.

“So you’re a celebrity at work now?”

“Yeah, ever since that day, people keep sneaking glances at me. I don’t get it—they should be staring at the idiots making dirty jokes in the office, not me.”

It had been a while since they last met, so the table was full of work stories. As Irae burst out laughing at Hyerin’s story, she refilled her friend’s glass with a shake of her head.

“Geez, working with all guys must be rough, huh?”

“Not really. I mean, yeah, I’m the only woman on the team, but everyone’s super decent.”

“Wait—all guys?”

“Yup, even the team leader. There’s this close-knit group of 28-year-olds right above me, and I kinda tag along like a little sibling. They’re chill—no one’s shady or anything. Feels more like… having a bunch of cousin-oppa types.”

As Hyerin smiled, thinking of her teammates, Irae gave her a sly look.

“All guys, huh… Any office romance?”

“What?”

“I saw that photo you posted with your team on SNS. There was a pretty good-looking guy in it, wasn’t there?”

Irae pulled out her phone and shoved the picture I’d uploaded toward me. Her finger pointed straight at—of course—Seongchan. Her eyes sparkled, silently demanding more details. He wasn’t my type, but I guess I had to admit he had a handsome face.

“Oh, yeah. He’s kind of famous as the good-looking guy from the dev team. The ladies in HR keep asking me to pass along their numbers to him…”

I’d been about to move past his looks and start ranting about his grumpy attitude and constant nagging, when a nearby chair slid in and a cocky voice interrupted.

“Two ladies, right? We’re two guys—mind if we join you?”

At the familiar voice, Hyerin didn’t even bother looking up. She let out a sigh. Irae forced a smile and looked up at the men.

“No, thanks. We’ll pass.”

“Come on, the place is packed, and there’s no empty tables. Just a drink or two, yeah?”

“Sorry, but we’re on the hunt for some energetic younger guys. We don’t play with old men—it kills the mood.”

The tone was familiar—teasing and irritating all at once. Even after the repeated rejection, the two bulky guys still took up the seats beside us. Feeling a warm shoulder brush hers, Hyerin turned her head with a displeased expression—and of course, there was Jaeyoon. Gone was his dazed face from earlier. He looked as languid and unreadable as always, cool air trailing after him.

“Cold?”

Without so much as a proper greeting, he asked it barely above a whisper. Before she could answer, he placed his jacket over her exposed thighs. Hyerin pushed his hand away with a curt voice.

“Sorry, but I wore this to show off my pretty legs.”

“I get it. Keep it on.”

He easily overpowered her attempt to push his hand away and muttered in a low, commanding voice. Hyerin didn’t respond. She just turned her head away indifferently. Meanwhile, Hyungwon, who had sat down beside Irae, was scowling like he was seriously annoyed.

“What? Energetic younger guys? What the hell are you gonna do with one of those?”

Irae, completely unfazed, responded while pouring more drinks.

“You know exactly what.”

“You brats are all grown up now, huh. Jeez.”

Hyungwon playfully ruffled her hair. All four of us had been close since we were kids playing in the same neighborhood. Irae set out new glasses for both Hyungwon and Jaeyoon and began to pour drinks.

“So seriously, what are you doing here? Just happened to see us while drinking?”

Hyungwon shot a glare at Hyerin.

“She walked out dressed like that and wasn’t answering her phone, so I came to detain her.”

“Oh, come on, I’m not a kid. I can take care of myself! Why’d you have to take that seat? Where’s my younger guy supposed to sit now?”

We all started bickering like nothing had happened earlier. I pouted the way I always did, and Hyungwon clinked his glass against Jaeyoon’s with an annoying grin.

“I came to keep that little punk from sitting here. If you’re that upset, want me to start calling you noona?”

Downing his drink in one go, Hyungwon gave Jaeyoon a sharp chin-nod. A low voice followed.

“Noona.”

Jaeyoon, leaning his chin on one hand, tilted his head slightly and looked straight at Hyerin.

“Hyerin noona?”

There was a teasing lilt to his voice, his crescent-moon eyes full of mischief. He had a way of saying absurd things without a hint of shame, leaving her flustered. Hyerin let out a low sigh, frowned at Jaeyoon, and then turned to glare at Hyungwon.

“What, so I’m not allowed to give up on Jaeyoon unless I find another guy first? Why are you blocking me again? Are you torturing me? What do you want from me?”

“That random dude you meet at a bar is so gonna be a catch, huh? Drunk guys have exactly one thing on their mind. Try to be a little careful. You’re old enough to know better.”

Hyungwon’s voice dropped unusually low as he refilled her glass. The mood grew heavier. Jaeyoon turned to Irae and asked,

“So, what were you two talking about before we got here?”

“Oh, uh… just work stuff? Oh right—Hyerin was talking about the hottie on her team.”

“Hottie?”

Jaeyoon repeated the word, and Irae brought up the photo they’d been looking at earlier and set her phone down in the center of the table.

“You know exactly who it is, right? Isn’t he stupidly good-looking?”

Just like Irae said, I hadn’t even told them who it was, but Hyungwon zoomed right in on one particular face without hesitation. Then, as if it all made sense, he nodded.

“Yeah, he’s handsome. And you work late with a guy like that—don’t you catch feelings?”

He wiggled his eyebrows as he asked. As Hyerin snuck glances at Jaeyoon staring at the screen, a piece of advice she once heard from a sunbae echoed in her mind:

“You gotta keep him on his toes. Make him think, ‘Hey, I’ve got other guys too, you know?’ Got it?”

Tension. She never believed something like that would work on Jaeyoon. Still, she figured there was nothing to lose.

“Well, I guess it could happen. I mean, a guy and a girl spending that much time together…”

She tried to sound as casual as possible and took a long swig from her glass. She was never good at lying, and worried her half-assed bluff would be caught. Smiling at Irae and Hyungwon, who were now making surprised noises, she secretly focused all her attention on reading even the tiniest shift in Jaeyoon’s expression.

But Jaeyoon just stared blankly at the photo. Then, when the screen dimmed, he calmly handed the phone back. It was impossible to tell if he’d even heard what she said—or if he just didn’t care. The tiny flicker of hope she’d allowed herself quietly fizzled out.

Now that the topic of attraction had come up, the conversation naturally shifted to dating. Irae, noticing that Jaeyoon was unusually quiet, asked him directly.

“Jaeyoon oppa, do you have a girlfriend right now?”

For a brief second, Jaeyoon’s gaze flicked toward Hyungwon, then dropped.

“Uh… no. Not right now.”

Noticing the glance, Hyerin turned to look at Hyungwon, who was also just staring into the bubbling hot pot like Jaeyoon had been. Come to think of it, she hadn’t heard anything about his dating life in a while either. But still—what was this weird tension? Trying to break the uncomfortable silence, Hyerin quickly asked:

“What about you, oppa? Got any students you’re into?”

Hyungwon nodded absentmindedly, then frowned and corrected her.

“Students? Shouldn’t you be asking if I’ve got my eye on a teacher? I’d need a pair of silver bracelets if it’s a student.”

“Oh, no worries. I was planning to report you right away if you said yes.”

“Oh, for crying out loud…”

With the usual banter back in play, the mood lightened again. Between small talk and drinks, the table slowly filled with laughter touched by a warm buzz.

“I’m gonna use the restroom…”

Hyerin stood up, pressing her flushed cheeks. She hadn’t realized while sitting, but after a few steps, the world began to blur slightly—definitely tipsy.

“I should get some fresh air.”

She wasn’t about to throw up or anything, but her head was burning hot. She stepped outside for a bit. Her legs wobbled. If she’d worn sweats and sneakers, this would’ve been manageable. But trying to balance on unstable ground in high heels made her sway dangerously. Eventually, she leaned against the alley wall behind the bar and looked up weakly at the pitch-black night sky. The sharp scent of soju seemed to rise off her body with every slow breath.

For once, her mind wasn’t on Jaeyoon or her busy work life. She was just sitting in her drunken haze—and it didn’t feel all that bad.

“Excuse me.”

She was enjoying the rare stillness with her eyes closed when a stranger’s voice dragged her half-conscious mind back into alertness. Her eyes fluttered open—and much closer than expected, a flashy-looking man was standing there with a too-friendly smile. Thanks to her heels, she was at eye level with him. His eyes roamed over her from head to toe with a sly glint.

“Wanna come hang out with us? Are you here with someone…?”

His gaze made his intentions all too clear, and as the sleazy words followed, Hyerin let out a laugh—dry and involuntary. When Jaeyoon had draped his coat over her earlier, she’d honestly thought wearing this outfit had been the right call. Now, though, she wasn’t so sure. Maybe she was getting older—because this kind of sexually charged attention just felt utterly exhausting.

Guess I should head back in.

She was just about to say she came with her boyfriend when the man—who’d been hovering around her—suddenly grabbed her wrist. Maybe he mistook that tired, hollow laugh for agreement. The smug expression on his face as he stepped closer made irritation boil up inside her.

And then—over his shoulder—she locked eyes with Jaeyoon.

She didn’t know how long he’d been standing there, but something in her chest loosened. Relief came first. Then, a sharp breath caught in her throat. The scowl that had wrinkled her brow smoothed out all at once, and her whole body slackened. His eyes, slower than usual to blink, stared straight at her, heavy shadows cast beneath them.

What’s he thinking right now?

“…How old are you?”

Hyerin didn’t break eye contact with Jaeyoon as she asked the question. Something about standing in front of him always brought out the worst in her—made her want to poke at him, prod at his calm like tossing a stone into a still lake, hoping it would stir something.

The man’s voice answered eagerly in the background, but she didn’t hear a word. All of her senses were trained on Jaeyoon as he walked toward her—steady, unblinking. Without hesitation, he peeled the man’s hand from her wrist with quiet strength and uttered just one line to end the whole scene.

“Let’s go, babe.”

Babe.

The stones she’d been tossing at him turned to boulders and came crashing down on her heart. She knew he’d only said it because it was the fastest, clearest way to diffuse the situation. Still, her chest surged with emotion.

“Oh—sorry. Didn’t know you were with someone…”

The man, looking suddenly small next to Jaeyoon, backed away awkwardly and disappeared down the alley. Hyerin stared down at Jaeyoon’s hand wrapped around her wrist. It was just a change in whose hand was there—but it felt burning hot for some reason. Using her drunkenness as an excuse, she leaned her head lightly against Jaeyoon’s chest.

“What the… why’d you come out here…”

The warmth of his body, the way it enveloped her, made it feel like she was being held. Maybe he thought she was too drunk to stay upright, because he gently held her shoulder to steady her.

“You were gone a while after going to the bathroom. You left your phone too, so…”

“…And?”

“I was worried.”

The low vibration of his voice traveled through their touching wrists, through her head resting against him—completely scrambling her pulse. She knew it wasn’t the kind of worry she wanted it to be. But even so, she couldn’t help but want his kindness. She wanted to stay in this warmth, just a little longer.

“Tch… Why’d you even come out here? If you hadn’t…”

Hyerin, who’d just said something she didn’t mean, lightly pushed Jaeyoon away and looked up at him. The narrow alley behind the restaurant, with the light at his back, cast his face in shadow—making it look endlessly dark. Her whole body tensed. She had no idea what it was about him that made it so hard to breathe.

“I still have to look up at you… Your height is so unnecessarily tall.”

She pulled her wrist free and tapped his shoulder, as if telling him to move aside. But strangely, Jaeyoon didn’t budge—he just stood there, staring down at her. If she’d felt a flicker of fear, it was probably some primitive instinct reacting to a creature stronger and bigger than herself.

“Don’t stumble around dressed like that. It’s dangerous.”

His low voice rippled through the narrow alley, reverberating through her whole body. After saying something that felt more like a warning than advice, he finally stepped aside to let her pass.

“Wow. You say I’m not a woman to you, but you’re real quick to assume other people see me that way. Or wait, are you worried about thieves or human traffickers or something?”

She tossed out the words, sharp and sarcastic, drunk on spite. And right at that moment, Jaeyoon’s phone started buzzing noisily in his pocket. Hyerin motioned with her chin as if to say, Go ahead and take it, and started to walk away.

“Pick it up. I’ll head back in first.”

He looked like he might follow her, but then glanced at his phone, gave a small nod, and stopped in his tracks. Must’ve been an important call. In the deep, dark alley, only the glow of his screen lit up his face.

As she made her way back to the restaurant, she noticed Irae laughing a little too loosely and Hyungwon standing beside her with an annoyed scowl. The two of them were waiting at the entrance like they’d been keeping an eye out. As Hyerin hurried over, Hyungwon shot his words like knives.

“Damn, were you taking a dump outside or what?”

“I just needed some air. What’s up with Song Irae? Why’s she so drunk?”

“No clue. One second she’s trashing her department manager for being an incompetent old geezer, next she’s chugging straight from the bottle.”

“And you didn’t stop her?”

“I did. This is the result of stopping her. Anyway, that’s it for tonight. Where’s Jaeyoon?”

He handed her bag and phone back as he asked.

“Still on the phone.”

Hyerin nodded toward the alley.

“You were with him?”

“Yeah. I was just starting to get hit on for once, and he came outta nowhere and ruined it.”

Hyungwon let out a small laugh, handed off the now-swaying Irae to her, and turned toward the alley—only to come back a moment later, for some reason. Before she could even ask, Irae leaned more heavily into her, practically dead weight.

“You go ahead. I’ll take Irae home.”

Hyerin tried to support the half-unconscious Irae and speak at the same time. But she was clearly struggling to keep her own balance. Hyungwon glanced back at Jaeyoon still on the phone, ran a frustrated hand through his hair, then took Irae from her arms.

“I’ll take her. You go.”

“You know where she lives?”

“Yeah.”

With that short answer, Hyungwon smoothly lifted Irae onto his back, then looked back at Hyerin.

“You… don’t do anything weird to Jaeyoon again.”

Weird things.

‘Why don’t you like me? You damn jerk.’

He was clearly talking about what happened earlier. Hyerin gave a twisted smile.

“Is that what had you all fidgety? You were worried I’d pull something with Jung Jaeyoon?”

“No, you idiot. It’s the opposite. Don’t go messing around with some drunk guy and just go home, got it?”

“Wait, are you saying you’re worried Jaeyoon might try something with me? God, I wish he would.”

“You little—just call me when you get home. No—I’ll call you, so pick up. You better!”

Hyungwon even pointed at her as he said it. Hyerin lazily waved him off, nodding half-heartedly at his unnecessary concern. Once she saw the two of them disappear down the street, she turned back toward the dark alley—where Jaeyoon was still on the phone—and quietly began to approach him.

“…Yes. I’ll think about it. See you then.”

Hearing the faint voice from afar, Hyerin realized why Hyungwon hadn’t approached Jaeyoon earlier. There was longing in that low voice. Her chest ached without warning. After a deep breath, it seemed Jaeyoon finally had the presence of mind to notice his surroundings—he spotted her.

“Oh… you didn’t leave?”

“I did. But apparently the night’s over. Irae’s way too drunk.”

“Ah… What about Hyungwon?”

“He said he’d take her home.”

She tilted her chin in the direction they’d gone, then asked carefully.

“Is your mom coming to Korea?”

Mom—she was asking about his mother. Jaeyoon had grown up in a divorced household, raised by his father, while his mother had remarried and lived abroad. When Hyerin met him, his mother hadn’t been in Korea, so she’d never seen her. But she knew, from watching him over the years, how deeply he missed his mother—and how that absence left him lonely.

“Yeah. Before the year’s over…”

“That’s good.”

“Thanks. Come on, I’ll take you home.”

“Why would you? We can go our separate ways. There’s that shortcut to your place from here anyway. I waited just to say goodbye. Get home safe.”

With a cheerful voice, Hyerin waved and turned around. Maybe the alcohol hadn’t worn off yet—or maybe now it was really starting to hit—either way, it was harder to keep her balance than before. Just as she teetered, a firm arm wrapped around her waist to steady her.

“I told you not to stumble around dressed like that. It’s dangerous…”

Jaeyoon’s voice came again, steady as always. Hyerin, tipsy and not quite herself, muttered with a self-mocking laugh.

“Wow, I usually don’t get this drunk. Guess I’m getting old.”

“You really gonna say that in front of someone older than you?”

“Wait, Jaeyoon, aren’t you younger than me? Earlier you were all shameless, calling me noona. Honestly, your face is such a contradiction.”

Hyerin flicked her eyebrows as she gently touched the arm wrapped around her waist.

“Jaeyoon, didn’t I tell you not to touch people who like you so carelessly?”

With a soft sigh, Jaeyoon let go of her waist and shrugged off his jacket, draping it over her shoulders. The jacket, long enough to cover her hips, still held his warmth—it spread through her body in an instant. Then he took her hand and placed it on his wrist.

“…Then you hold on. Pretend I’m a walking handrail.”

“Oh… I see. So it’s okay if I hold on.”

Hyerin carefully gripped his wrist. His frame was so solid, her hand couldn’t even wrap all the way around it. She was reminded again of just how built he really was. As Jaeyoon started walking, Hyerin followed at a slow pace. Once they left the alley buzzing with neon lights, the world went quiet all at once. No one else was around. After a while of walking in silence, he asked quietly,

“It’s windy. Aren’t you cold?”

A chilly night breeze ruffled Jaeyoon’s hair as he turned to her, carrying with it a soft, clean scent. He said he’d just come from basketball—but there wasn’t a hint of sweat. Just that gentle shampoo smell. Hyerin stared at him in a daze for a moment, then fiddled with the jacket around her shoulders and twisted her lips.

“If I say yes… what? You’ll hug me, since you already gave me your jacket?”

As always, she spoke teasingly. Jaeyoon just let out a small laugh and lowered his head. Almost at her apartment complex, Hyerin looked ahead and slowly let go of his wrist.

“You can go now. I’m here.”

“I’ll see you in. It’s for my own peace of mind. Don’t push me away.”

“Don’t push me away”—he was saying exactly what she wanted to say.

He reached his hand out again, as if asking her to hold it.

A strange sense of defiance stirred in Hyerin. Instead of grabbing his wrist, she gripped his hand.

He flinched slightly but then resumed walking as if nothing had happened.

Her heart pounded from holding his hand for the first time, but knowing he probably didn’t feel the same made her stop in her tracks.

Jaeyoon naturally came to a stop too and turned to her.

“Jaeyoon,” she called his name and looked up at him quietly.

Sensing something in her tone, he smiled—but slower than usual—and answered,

“Yeah.”

He had always been kind, no matter how bratty, stubborn, or tearful she was.

His warmth in her hand, the scent at the tip of her nose—it all made her chest ache.

She wanted to complain endlessly tonight.

It was Jaeyoon who had always tried to let her go maturely, yet stayed by her side.

This was all his fault.

“Wanna sleep with me?”

She tossed it out lightly, like a snap of her front teeth.

If he so much as looked shocked or flustered, she was ready to scoff and brush it off.

But Jaeyoon simply stared at her.

Hyerin stepped closer.

The cool night air that had been around them now felt warmed by the heat radiating off him.

“You said you don’t have a girlfriend right now. Your body must get lonely.”

His breath, hot and laced with alcohol, brushed her face.

Though he said nothing, his chest rose and fell more noticeably, the muscles in his jaw tightening.

Something about his reaction—almost like anger—made her tense her shoulders, but she didn’t back down.

“They say a drunk man only has one thing on his mind… Thought maybe this was my chance.”

Because of her heels, his face was closer than usual—just one small step and their lips would touch.

His silence made her all the more stubborn.

He wasn’t saying yes, but he wasn’t pushing her away either.

In his eyes, she saw something fierce—like rage.

It looked like it could swallow her whole.

That intensity made it hard to breathe… and yet sent chills through her body.

It scared her—and thrilled her.

Hyerin lifted his hand to her face, then guided it slowly down her cheek, jaw, neck… all the way to her chest.

“…Am I really not it?”

Her breath quickened with nerves, her voice slightly trembling—proof that the alcohol was wearing off.

Realizing time was running out, Hyerin urgently lifted herself on her toes.

Just as their lips were about to meet, Jaeyoon let out a shaky breath and turned his head away.

“Hyerin.”

“……”

“…Stop.”

His voice rumbled through her chest where they touched.

They were this close, and still—nothing happened.

A cold humiliation crept into her bones, and her jaw trembled.

Then, her bag began to buzz—

Time’s up.

With her eyes cast down, Hyerin let out a small laugh.

“Guess drunk guys aren’t any different after all.”

“……”

“Or maybe… you’re just not drunk enough?”

She stepped back two paces and pulled out her phone.

Across the screen, “Joo Hyungwon” lit up, vibrating loudly.

She showed him the screen with a small tilt, smiling faintly.

“Hyungwon told me not to try anything weird with you.”

“……”

“Should’ve listened, huh? Today really was dangerous.”

She took off the jacket draped over her shoulders and handed it back to him, then slowly stepped back, waving her hand.

“Don’t worry. I sobered up after getting rejected.”

“……”

“Thanks for walking me home. Bye.”

Despite her cheerful goodbye, Jaeyoon simply stood there, watching her in silence.

The fact that he didn’t even smile told her she must’ve really messed up.

Thinking that way made everything—what happened earlier today, and just now—feel all the more regretful.

Why was everything unraveling like this?

She should be used to rejection by now, but her heart ached even more deeply this time.

Standing beneath the streetlight, framed by golden trees and fallen leaves, Jaeyoon looked beautiful.

That familiar rush—half thrill, half ache—came crashing over her like a wave.

She knew this moment would stay with her, unforgettable.

Which is why she opened her mouth again.

Because once again, she felt that not saying it would be a regret.

“…Oppa, I missed you.”

“……”

Twenty-six, in autumn—another confession slipped out, impatient and uninvited.

“I like you.”

She was hopelessly selfish, unable to hide her feelings even now.

And he was always so gentle.

“…I’m sorry.”

Jaeyoon shook his head as he spoke.

His voice trembled softly, tinged with sorrow.

It was unfair.

She was the one being rejected, so why did he look like he was the one suffering?

Hyerin forced a smile with the last of her strength and turned away, finally answering the call that had been ringing endlessly.

—What the hell? Took you long enough. You home yet?

Hyungwon’s familiar voice rang through the sharp wind.

Hyerin bit her lip and exhaled softly, focusing all her energy on walking straight.

She still felt Jaeyoon’s gaze pressing against her back.

—Hey, what’s wrong…? Hyerin?

She tried to steady her breath, wiped her stinging eyes, and tried her best to sound composed.

But the tears slipped down anyway.

“Agh… damn it, what the hell…”

The weight in her chest was unbearable, and she lashed out in frustration.

But her breath kept catching, soon shaking like a sobbing child.

—Are you crying…?

“……”

—Hey. Tell me the truth. What happened with Jaeyoon?

She wanted to hold it together like an adult, to swallow down the tears.

But Hyungwon, ever perceptive, kept poking at the sore spots.

Hyerin’s face twisted, her voice rising with irritation.

“Hhhng… Nothing happened… hic… That’s why I’m crying.”

—…What?

As she passed the playground in front of her apartment, Hyerin suddenly dropped to a crouch and burst into tears.

“Stupid Jaeyoon… hic… goddamn eunuch…”

She should’ve been used to his rejections by now, but tonight, the sorrow clung tighter than ever.

 

It had to be because she’d gotten drunk for the both of them.