GDTEA Chapter 39

When a person is too flustered, they say one becomes speechless.

Sharti clutched her head.

‘Husband? Newlyweds?’

Sharti, who had never even properly dated or recognized others as potential romantic partners until she became an adult at twenty, felt her head growing hot and dizzy from this unexpected misunderstanding.

“I’d appreciate it if you were more careful with your words next time.”

While Sharti was in shock, Ren quickly finished his silent affirmation. Then he moved closer to stand behind her.

Standing firmly behind her as if protecting her, they looked even more like a couple with a good relationship.

“I seem to have suddenly interrupted your quality time together. I’ll leave right away.”

Since Ren was shirtless as if he’d just taken a shower, the merchant’s misunderstanding deepened.

The merchant gathered his belongings and stood up.

“So that’s why you young newlyweds are living in the mountains like this.”

The misunderstanding was unintentionally growing deeper.

‘No! He’s not my husband!’

Sharti quickly waved her hands, but to the merchant, it only looked like she was being shy.

Sharti alone struggled with the frustration.

“That’s not it.”

Finally, Ren denied it.

His calm voice was helping Sharti become composed, but then Ren turned his head to look at her. His gaze, partially hidden by the towel, was fully conveyed to her.

Sharti flinched as Ren spoke again.

“It’s because she’s passionate about her profession.”

“…?”

“An environment where one can explore knowledge and focus on research is important.”

“Ah, I see!”

“…?”

What was he seeing?

Sharti could only blink, unable to follow the conversation between the two.

“No wonder the wife is so skilled, with such understanding and support from her husband.”

“I’m trying to be more helpful.”

The merchant gave them an appreciative look, as if admiring their warm newlywed relationship.

‘No…’

Sharti made a sour face as she watched the conversation between Ren and the merchant.

Even though Ren wasn’t deliberately deceiving anyone, his words were being strangely misinterpreted.

During this, the merchant’s eyes sparkled as he sidled up to Ren.

“I run a general store, and as you probably know, your wife’s medicines are quite popular.”

“She’s a skilled doctor. She’s good at treating illnesses, and her medicines are effective.”

“Yes, yes. That’s why I wanted to request she make a special medicine, but I gave up.”

“Why is that?”

Ren’s voice carried a hint of puzzlement.

The merchant laughed.

“It seemed too much for your wife to handle.”

“There shouldn’t be any medicine she can’t make.”

Ren had pride in Sharti’s abilities.

At his confident trust, Sharti reflexively looked up at Ren.

“Alone, it’s still…the medicine-making process is quite challenging.”

The merchant explained the medicine-making process with a subtle tone. Ren nodded as he mentioned the need for testing side effects, effectiveness, and duration.

And he privately marveled.

Sharti must have been handling all of this by herself until now.

“Of course, it would be possible if your husband helped…”

“…!”

Sharti finally caught on to the merchant’s intention in mentioning the request she had refused. The merchant was skillfully manipulating Ren with his cunning speech.

As Sharti frowned and was about to take out a note to write something, Ren spoke.

“I’ll help.”

Ren said while holding Sharti’s robe sleeve.

At his resolute voice, Sharti quickly shook her head.

‘Do you even know what you’re offering to help with?’

The desperate Sharti hastily grabbed Ren’s palm.

But Ren, noticing Sharti’s refusal, instead took her hand and bent down to whisper in her ear.

“I’ll devote myself to helping you, master.”

“…!”

“Without any shortcomings.”

Sharti immediately covered her ears and pulled away from him, feeling a ticklish sensation that penetrated her ear.

In her moment of confusion, Sharti’s feet got tangled and she stumbled.

Ren immediately caught her body.

“Are you alright?”

For a moment, it seemed like there was a hint of laughter in his voice.

Sharti felt a wave of embarrassment wash over her confusion.

As Sharti struggled, asking to be let go, the corners of Ren’s mouth lifted slightly.

“Then I’ll take that as acceptance of the request and take my leave, madam.”

Mistakenly thinking the newlywed couple’s display of affection was about to intensify, the merchant left the log cabin faster than the wind.

Sharti, who had been staring blankly at where the merchant had been, finally covered her face weakly.

‘I… don’t know anymore…’

Sharti ultimately lost all her motivation.

Then Sharti came to her senses and checked her own appearance.

Ren was still holding her waist, not letting go.

‘He’s gone. Let me go now.’

Tap, tap. Sharti pressed his forearm and made a chin gesture.

“……”

But Ren only removed the towel covering his head without releasing his hold on her.

“Sha-. I was wrong.”

“……”

Sharti raised her gaze to follow his dejected voice.

His blue-green eyes were shining sadly.

“My selfish good intentions scared you, and my foolish actions hurt you.”

Each word he slowly uttered was heavy.

His eyes, focused only on Sharti, were infinitely deep.

Sharti recalled the previous evening. Although it was she who had suffered, writhing from trauma, it was he who seemed more hurt.

[It’s okay. I’m here. I, I was wrong. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Please, it’s okay, because I’m by your side.]

His voice whispering desperately, almost pleading. His hands holding her tighter than now. And the memory of her crying in Ren’s arms.

These were the memories that had embraced the anxiety she felt as soon as she opened her eyes today.

“And I didn’t see your face. Really.”

“……”

“So please, won’t you look at me now?”

The ends of his dark eyebrows drooped downward.

Sharti opened and closed her mouth repeatedly.

She felt as if an emotion—whether laughter or tears, she couldn’t tell—was about to burst out.

Sharti bit her trembling lips.

“…Sha?”

Ren watched her reaction carefully and loosened his grip.

The moment they were slightly apart, Sharti poked him between his eyebrows.

“…?”

When Ren stopped in surprise, his furrowed brow smoothed out.

Sharti smiled silently and opened her palm.

<My throat hurts.> 

<Everything hurts.>

“I’m sorry.”

At her mention of pain, Ren immediately withdrew his hands.

“I…”

<My pain isn’t because of Ren.>

<So stop looking so down.>

“……”

Ren stared at Sharti’s palm, his lips tightly closed.

“But if it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have cried.”

Sharti couldn’t immediately refute his guilt-ridden words.

The blue-green eyes shone sorrowfully.

“So you were wishing I would leave right away, even today.”

“…?”

Another misunderstanding was building here.

But since it was true that she had been avoiding Ren all day, Sharti reflected on her actions.

She needed to quickly acknowledge her mistake and clear up the misunderstanding.

<That’s not it.>

“…Not?”

Sharti nodded vigorously.

Ren looked at her with doubtful eyes.

“If not, then why….did you give me clothes?”

At Ren’s hesitant question, Sharti blinked.

Then Sharti lowered her gaze to check the pants he was wearing.

They were pants she had made for him.

<I needed to check the measurements.>

“……”

Ren blinked as if taken aback.

A brief, awkward silence passed.

‘Is the misunderstanding cleared up?’

Then Ren tilted his head back and covered his face.

“Haaa……”

His deep sigh and reddened ears reflected his state of mind.

It seemed the misunderstanding was resolved.

Sharti, watching Ren’s reaction, tilted her head.

‘But I’m sure I left both top and bottom at the door?’

She couldn’t understand why he had come out wearing only the pants.

And with no top at all.

Wasn’t that what had deepened the merchant’s misunderstanding?

‘…That’s right! The request!’

There was still a misunderstanding that needed to be corrected.

The thought of explaining the content of the unintentionally accepted request to Ren made her feel dizzy.

Looking at Ren with troubled eyes, Sharti suddenly remembered what he had whispered.

[I’ll devote myself to helping you, master.]

Sharti shuddered.

Especially with Ren’s well-defined muscles in plain sight, her face heated up instantly.

Belatedly conscious of the embarrassment, Sharti searched for somewhere to look.

“I thought I had nothing to say even if I was kicked out.”

Ren muttered, still covering his face.

Sharti kept her mouth shut.

She couldn’t deny it, leaving a bitter taste in her mouth.

‘Perhaps I did wish Ren would be gone.’

She didn’t want to explain the cause of her episode to Ren, and she didn’t want to face the fear that he had seen her face.

Perhaps that’s why she had avoided him, using the excuse that her body ached as if beaten whenever she had an episode.

“……”

Sharti rubbed her neck.

She endured the burning pain in her throat, straining her neck.

“Am I really not strange?”

“…What?”

“Suspicious, hideous, with many terrible secrets.”

It was an unnecessary thing to say.

What good would it do to belittle herself?

Nevertheless, Sharti spoke from her heart rather than her head.

“It’s you who should be avoiding me, not the other way around.”

She was now harboring futile hopes.

It was no different from testing Ren, and a small laugh escaped her.

Sharti stared steadfastly at the silent Ren.

“So why do you keep trying to be involved with me? Every time you do, I feel uncomfortable and scared.”

“……”

“Your every word, every action makes me anxious.”

“Why?”

At his flat voice, Sharti’s fingertips trembled.

Under his gaze that seemed to pierce through her cowardly inner thoughts, Sharti clutched her clothes.

“Didn’t you already decide I’d be leaving tomorrow anyway? You weren’t that concerned about your secrets being revealed, so why now?”

Sharti couldn’t refute his words that struck at the truth.

Using her stinging throat as an excuse, Sharti was about to close her mouth when Ren spoke.

“Let me say one thing too, yes. I do find you strange, Sha.”

“…!”

“Why are you so kind to me? Did you pity me as an injured patient? Did it feel like keeping a pet?”

Startled by his sudden sarcastic tone, Sharti was taken aback.

“And then why try to send me away when I haven’t even recovered my memories? Did you forget your promise? And! Why are you so at ease sending me away when I’ve discovered your secrets?”

“Ah, no… Grandma Vireta will take care of you…”

“That old woman won’t be watching me day and night, so how do you plan to stop me from talking?”

“……”

Overwhelmed by his relentless questioning, Sharti could only open and close her mouth wordlessly.

But Ren didn’t care.

Instead, he began to express his hurt feelings as if upset.

“You’re nice to me then ignore me, cautious then careless, close then distant. I too, Sha, have been anxious about your every word and action.”

By the end, Ren turned his head abruptly as if choked up.

As Ren gritted his teeth as if holding back surging emotions, Sharti fidgeted, not knowing what to do.

She couldn’t even feel the pain in her throat at Ren’s unexpected display of grievance.

“B-but surely you received an offer from Grandma Vireta…”

“There was an offer, as I said, but I haven’t answered yet.”

Sharti blinked, not understanding.

Wasn’t the answer already decided?

There was no reason for him not to go with Vireta.

“I… don’t want to leave this place.”

However, Ren’s answer was different.

The sincerity wavering in his firm gaze was directed at Sharti.

“I like being with you.”

“……”

“Won’t you continue to take me in?”

The emotional intensity from just moments ago had vanished. His calm face was hiding his tension.

With her gaze captivated by Ren, Sharti blankly opened her mouth.

“…But you need to find your memories.”

“……”

“There might be people waiting for Ren. You might have a place to return to.”

“That might be true.”

Ren shrugged and replied lightly.

His expression, which had been frozen and expressionless, relaxed considerably.

“But right now, your secret is more important to me than my memories, Sha.”

A deep smile had already appeared on Ren’s lips.

“I want to stay here and help keep your secret until your anxiety is covered by trust in me. That’s my decision now.”