YIDW Chapter 37

Chapter 37 – The Unborn Child

He was just about to get up from his work to return home from the palace to the mansion.

Knock-knock.

Edric sighed and answered at the sound of a knock.

“Yes.”

He knew who it was just by hearing the knock. And as expected, Crown Prince Lucius came in with a grin. It was the kind of stupid grin he often made when asking for something.

“Please.”

He said, handing over the next quarter’s military budget. Feeling sorry, he added,

“You can take your time.”

“Let’s do it now.”

Edric spoke comfortably to him, it was mainly because they had promised to treat each other as close friends, outside the work hours.

“Is that okay?”

Lucius said with an embarrassed face as Edric sat back down.

“This makes me feel bad.”

“If you’re sorry, then give it to me a little earlier next time.”

Lucius burst into laughter at his sharp retort.

“I’ll treat you to a drink soon.”

“I’ll decline.”

Drinking with Lucius, how could he leave a place that would obviously be full of work without going crazy?

He was a good man on a human level, but he was lacking as the successor to the empire. A bit too much.

“You seem like a tough guy.”

Lucius smiled awkwardly and left, and Edric put his glasses back on to start the work that Lucius had given him.

He checked his pocket watch before getting serious about his work.

Seven o’clock.

‘I still have time.’

He would just have to get home before the annexation anyway.

Edric covered his watch and focused on his work.

What he had thought would be simple took more effort than he had expected.

It was the usual behavior of Lucius, who hated doing difficult work and would always pass it on to Edric.

Review, re-review. Compare, cut back.

After repeating the hamster wheel-like process several times, he came up with a somewhat satisfactory result.

Edric took off his glasses and pressed them between his tired eyes.

It’s nice and fulfilling to accomplish something difficult, but he hated not getting anything for nothing. That’s why he was never going to listen to Lucius’s petty requests again.

He made up his mind and looked at his pocket watch.

“… … .”

Thinking he must have seen it wrong, he put his glasses back on.

Oh no.

It must have been nine at the latest, but it was already eleven.

Edric got up in a hurry.

He ran down the stairs without even putting on the jacket he was holding.

Mellie’s voice came to mind.

“You’re coming early today, right?”

Her eyes looked very earnest when she asked him that.

The carriage was already waiting at the entrance to the main palace. Wilson bowed and opened the carriage door.

“Reach home as soon as possible.”

He said softly to Wilson. Wilson, who followed him shouted the same to the coachman.

“He said to go as fast as possible.”

However, no matter how fast a carriage went, it couldn’t even run as fast as a car could go leisurely.

Old-fashioned people.

The old rule that carriages must be used in the palace has been maintained until now.

The carriage wheels rolled so slowly that he was resentful of himself for not having made a suggestion earlier.

Just as he was about to pass the main gate of the palace, he suddenly remembered what had happened at the banquet the other day.

‘You should have a child soon, so that the pain of the miscarriage will be forgotten.’

It would have been better not to say anything about it.

Edric could not forget the image of Mellie smiling in gratitude at Lady Clurissa’s words.

Her smile that day seemed sadder than tears.

That’s why he had tried to comply with the request without complaint this time.

‘Damn it.’

The situation was not helping him at all.

His face was filled with impatience as he looked at the clogged road.

“They say there’s a festival in the nearby town,”

Wilson said softly. The clock was already past eleven thirty.

It seemed too late for midnight.

At this point, Edric had no choice but to wish for something else.

‘I wish Mellie were sleeping.’

***

Eleven thirty.

Edric, who said he would come home as early as possible, still hadn’t come back.

Mellie felt sad.

The beautifully dressed appearance that satisfied her own self, and the strange pajamas that had made her look forward to it, were now the only factors that fueled her sadness.

‘Is there really that much work?’

Mellie thought as she wrapped herself tightly in her gown and sat down on the chair.

‘How much work is it for him to be this late?’

She couldn’t think of any other reason for being late.

He was a man who valued work. More than herself. More than anything else.

For a moment, she resented him. No, she resented Crown Prince Lucius.

He relied on Edric so much that he often left his work to him.

‘I should make him a cup of tea when he gets back.’

Mellie, who suddenly felt sorry for him, shook off her sadness and prepared boiled water and tea.

Mellie waited for him as she watched the white steam change into fine droplets in the glass pot.

However, as midnight passed and it was approaching one in the morning, she began to feel sleepy.

The interval between closing and opening her eyes felt longer, even to her own perception.

Then, at some point, she fell asleep.

In her dream, she was walking along a pasture path in broad daylight.

She stopped for a moment when she saw children playing with sheep beyond the fence.

It was such a peaceful scene that a smile naturally came to her face.

Then, suddenly, a boy of about three or four years old approached Mellie and greeted her.

‘Hello.’

‘… ‘

The smile disappeared from Mellie’s face.

Blonde hair and blue eyes. Facial features that looked just like someone else’s.

‘Edric.’

The boy looked just like him. Mellie knew that this was her child, whom she had lost through carelessness.

‘Hello… ‘

Mellie pulled the boy into her arms with her trembling hands.

The warmth she felt from his small body.

‘Mom.’

The boy called her in a small voice. Those were the words she always wanted to hear.

Something hot welled up inside her.

‘I’m sorry.’

Mellie hugged the child and cried.

‘I’m sorry, I couldn’t protect you.’

The child patted her mother’s back with a fern-like hand as if he meant to say that she didn’t have to feel sorry.

The warm touch, the warm body temperature, Mellie wished time would stop like this.

However, the child’s body temperature gradually faded away. And suddenly, the cool feeling behind her back felt unfamiliar, so Mellie opened her eyes.

It was then that she saw blue eyes that looked just like her child in the pitch-black space.

“Edric.”

He had just moved her from the sofa to the bed.

“When did you come?”

“Just now.”

“Oh, I see.”

Mellie tried to raise her body with strength in her arms. Then Edric said,

“You seem tired. You should sleep more.”

“Yes, you too.” She had originally planned to say that.

Not for her own sake, but for his. He must have been very tired if he had come back in the darkness of the night.

But.

“Mom.”

The voice of the child calling her was clear in her ears. The warm body temperature still seemed to linger in her arms. She didn’t want to leave that faint feeling as a mere dream.

“Ah… … No.”

“… … .”

“We have work to do.”

At those words, Edric stared at her quietly in the darkness for a while. His gaze was filled with vague disillusionment.

“You’re so selfish.”

Finally, he opened his mouth.

“Do you know what time it is? It’s two in the morning.”

“… … .”

“You could have asked me something else first, instead of asking me what I had to do, since I came in at this hour.”

At that moment, Mellie came to her senses.

She quickly apologized.

“I… … I’m sorry. I was so sleepy, my thoughts were short.”

At those words, Edric burst out laughing and said,

“That means you don’t care about me at all. It’s all because of a child who’s not even born.”

“… … .”

A child who’s not even born. While Mellie was momentarily dazed by those words, Edric looked at her with a languid gaze.

A nightgown with a soft sheen like the moon reflected on the night sea. And smooth thighs visible through the gap in the open fastening. For a moment, his lips tilted slanted.

“You look so pretty today.”

“… … .”

“If it weren’t for the sake of having a child, would you have waited for me like this?”

He shook his head and answered his own question.

“I don’t think so. To you, I’m just a breeding stallion.”

“… … .”

“There’s no union today.”

He left the room after giving her a cold announcement. Without giving Mellie any chance to argue.

***

“A breeding stallion… … .”

Mellie placed the pajamas that had been wrapped around her body last night on the bed and looked at them as she muttered.

It wasn’t unreasonable for Edric to think that way.

She had forced the union on him when he came home tired from work.

The dream was too sweet. And too desperate.

She had done something to him in reality that she couldn’t do because of the child in her fantasy… … .

Mellie quickly picked up the pajamas and rolled them up. The pajamas that had seemed to have given her such a strange thrill last night now looked like an eyesore.

She stuffed them into the drawer and quickly closed it.

“… … .”

But suddenly, in the afterimage that came to mind, she opened the dresser again.

Through the gaps between the layers of clothes, she saw a pure white cotton cloth.

It was the cloth that had been set aside to make a maternity jacket for the baby in her stomach.

Before she could even make the clothes, the baby disappeared.

It was truly an unfortunate accident.

Mellie stroked the cotton cloth quietly and buried her face in it.

The scent of the cloth faintly caressed her nose.

She wanted to see the baby laughing while wearing these clothes. No, she wanted to see it whining.

She wanted to bring it back to her quickly, but the baby never came back, either because it had lost its way or because it no longer wanted to settle its life in the careless mother.

Mellie felt heartbroken.

But… … Her husband came first. She didn’t want to seem like a selfish woman to him anymore.

Mellie kissed the cotton cloth, folded it neatly again, and put it in the dresser. She carefully hid it so that it wouldn’t be seen among the other clothes.

Then she got up and saw the medicine that Anna had left on the table.

A medicine that would help with pregnancy.

Mellie looked at it for a moment, then threw it in the sink.

***

“Here’s this.”

The next day, Mellie handed him a thermos before he left for work.

“I prepared this especially because they say it’s good for fatigue. You must have been very tired yesterday.”

Mellie blushed and looked down, as if reflecting on the night before.

“Drink it well.”

Edric took the thermos indifferently and immediately handed it over to Wilson.

Wilson politely accepted the thermos along with the briefcase and passed Mellie leisurely.

Mellie followed Edric and Wilson. When Ada joined them, she was pushed to the end of the line that led to Edric, Ada, and Wilson, but she was no longer gloomy.

“Don’t overdo it and take it easy.”

She saw Edric off with a cheerful attitude the whole time.

Edric smiled knowingly, conscious of Mellie moving further and further away as the carriage departed.

Last night, he had pushed his patience to the limit and raced through the jammed roads, but Edric was honestly disappointed that she immediately demanded a union as soon as she saw him.

That’s why he said harsh words without realizing it.

‘That means you don’t care about me. Because of the child that hasn’t even come.’

Even if other words were true, he shouldn’t have brought up the topic of children like that.

Especially since he had watched her struggle for the past three years due to her difficult pregnancy.

While he was pondering how to make up for last night, Edric was deeply relieved by Mellie’s much more docile attitude.

Perhaps his somewhat shocking words were the trigger that made her let go of her obsession with pregnancy.

‘Sometimes, this isn’t so bad.’

Completely freed from the guilt that had weighed on his chest all night, he turned his head, feeling satisfied with this unintended outcome.

The slant of the sun’s rays, the cool breeze, the smell of grass tickling his nostrils, and the cool stretch of road.

He could now enjoy all of this.

Unlike last night, when he had been boiling in the middle of a jam-packed road and his head was about to go numb.