The man who had grabbed my wrist must have thought I had lost my way. When I came to my senses, I realized that it was indeed a dark, narrow alley, a place I would usually avoid because it was dangerous.
“Huh? Why are you crying?”
The man who was holding my hand noticed that I was crying and seemed startled. He looked like a noble of my age. This was an area that nobles typically didn’t visit, so even though he had dressed simply to blend in, I could immediately tell he wasn’t from here. It seemed he realized the same thing about me.
Despite the confusion, I knew I should at least thank him. Just as I was about to express my gratitude, my entire body was pulled by the force of the hand that snatched me away from the man who was holding me.
As soon as I was embraced, I smelled the familiar scent of trees from the forest. It was Armin.
“Vivi! Are you okay?”
“Ah…”
Why was Armin here? What about Lady Rose?
Armin looked at my face and his expression hardened.
“You’re crying? Why are you crying? What happened?”
I had to say nothing happened, but my mind was blank in the sudden situation.
“Armin Grey? Oh my, to think I’d meet you in a place like this.”
The man who had grabbed my wrist spoke to Armin in a friendly tone, as if they had known each other for a long time.
Armin turned to face the man. The black-haired man was someone I had never seen before. If he was someone close to Armin, I should have recognized him.
But soon, I realized why I hadn’t seen him before.
“…Zeta.”
Armin started to say something more after the name, but stopped when the man put a finger to his lips. It was a sign to be quiet, as if he didn’t want his identity revealed.
But even just the name made it clear who he was. There was only one person in the country with the name Zeta.
In the royal family, there was only one prince, and his name was Zeta.
“Are you with Armin?”
“Yes.”
The man looked at both me and Armin in turn and then smiled.
“So, you’re the brown-haired young lady accompanying Armin. My mother spoke about you. You seem bolder than I expected.”
Armin didn’t hide his discomfort with the man showing interest in me. The man seemed to find this amusing, and his voice was full of curiosity.
“If you’re going to make that face, you should have taken better care of your companion. If it weren’t for me…”
“Thank you for helping my companion, but please step aside.”
Armin cut the man off before he could finish his sentence.
Despite the dismissive tone, Zeta didn’t comment on Armin’s rudeness. He glanced at my face with interest and then shrugged his shoulders.
I had heard that Zeta had just turned of age. Since the Empress and the Duchess were cousins, the two men had likely been close since childhood. Based on their conversation, it seemed like they were quite familiar with each other.
It was only after Zeta left that Armin gently wiped my face, which he had held in his hands, and asked,
“Vivi, tell me, are you okay? Why are you crying? What happened with Zeta?”
To such a question from Armin, I blurted out a foolish question.
“What about Lady Rose?”
“Lady Rose?”
“Yes…”
“Sorry, but I told her to pick her own riding crop before I left.”
Armin furrowed his brows. The fact that he had chosen me over the rose of the social scene made my mind spin. Words floated around in my disorganized thoughts, and soon they started spilling out of my mouth uncontrollably.
“The lady likes you, Armin.”
At my words, Armin slowly blinked but didn’t respond. He must have known that Lady Rose liked him. There were always people like that around him.
I spoke again with more emphasis.
“Lady Rose likes you. That’s why she came all the way here. She likes you.”
After hearing my words, Armin stayed silent for a while and then asked me. His gaze was serious.
“And you?”
He asked again, this time with even more insistence.
“What about you?”
“What do you mean?”
“I understand you want to introduce Lady Rose as a good woman. I also understand she likes me. So, Vivian, what do you want me to do?”
I had already pushed him away twice. Yet, Armin patiently asked again. His feelings seemed desperate. A heavy gloom made my stomach ache, and my voice sounded miserable, even to me.
“I…”
It was hard to get the words out. I was just glad I wasn’t crying.
“…I want you to get along well with Lady Rose.”
“Ha.”
A sigh that sounded like a sneer escaped from Armin’s lips. The sound startled me, and my body trembled. But unlike usual, he didn’t hold me or show concern for me.
“You want me to get along well with Lady Rose? Are you serious?”
“…”
“I asked you three times, and your answer is still the same. So this is your answer, Vivian.”
I looked down at the ground and tried to hold back my tears. A one-sided love that withered without ever blooming. Of course, I was sad.
But compared to Lady Rose, I had nothing to offer. Sadly, it was true in terms of both looks and family background.
‘If this goes on, Armin will miss the right age for marriage.’
I didn’t want Armin to lose out because of me. I nodded, trying to force myself to accept it. Seeing my acceptance, Armin’s hand, which had been weakly holding my arm, let go.
“Let’s get in the carriage and go back.”
Armin’s breathing was ragged. He spoke to me with a voice that held no emotion. His irritated voice poured over me without a response from me.
“Don’t stray off. Get in the carriage and go back. I don’t want to hear that something happened because of me.”
“…It’s not like that.”
“I guess I don’t need to escort you to the carriage. I should go back to Lady Rose. Since it’s what you want, I’ll do it. You want me to get along with Lady Rose, right?”
Every word that came out of his mouth felt like it was digging into my heart, but I forced a smile and nodded.
How ridiculous. I had said I wanted us to get along, and yet here I was, hurt by it.
Armin stared at me silently for a few seconds before averting his gaze. As he turned to walk away, there was no farewell.
It was shocking, especially since he had always been kind to me. I thought I shouldn’t cry, but I couldn’t stop the tears that blurred my vision and warmed my face.
“I’m doomed…”
My voice cracked, sounding terrible.
“I’m doomed, I’m doomed, I’m doomed!”
Once, I could call it a mistake. Twice, well… it could have happened. But someone who missed the third chance was hopeless. There would be no more chances for me.
Why couldn’t I be honest? I could feel people passing by glancing at me, but once the tears started, they didn’t stop.
In romance novels or dramas, the beautiful women shed tears silently, but the reflection of me in the shop window was a mess of tears and snot, looking like a complete disaster.
“I should have just confessed honestly… sniff…what is this…! That sly woman will become the Duchess, and then I’ll never see the Duke or Duchess again…”
The Duke and Duchess didn’t matter. The thought that I would never see Armin again made me even sadder. It was as if every drop of moisture in my body turned into tears and snot. Even after my sleeves had already gotten damp, tears still poured out uncontrollably.
“sniff… hic… I should’ve at least told him I like him…”
What kind of expression would Armin have made if I had told him I liked him? I couldn’t even imagine, but now it was something that could never happen in reality. There was no way the gods would grant a fourth chance to someone who had missed three.
If we meet again, I’ll have to smile and chat with him as if everything’s fine. But that imagined version of myself seemed so pathetic. I never thought that Armin’s smiles, kindness, and playful teasing, which were always given to me, would now belong to someone else. The pain of that loss was something I hadn’t expected.
“What is this… fool… idiot… jellyfish… sea cucumber… sea anemone.”
That’s when I sat down. I couldn’t go to the carriage with such a messy face. Armin wouldn’t care anymore, but the Duchess would be worried about me. Explaining today’s events to her would only lead to more tears.
In the end, it would make Armin feel uncomfortable. I pushed him to find a good woman, and now I was crying and holding on to him. He would probably get fed up with me.
I desperately tried to hold back my tears. As I suppressed them, hiccups started to bubble up. Sitting on the street, sobbing and hiccuping like this—what a pathetic sight I must be.
I thought I’d wait just a little longer until the hiccups stopped, then go back to the carriage. That’s what I was thinking when I heard the voice.
“Why are you lying like this if you’re going to cry so much?”
Was it a hallucination? Was I dehydrated from crying too much? There was a violet gaze staring at me in disbelief.
It was Armin.
