SACCHARIN
CHAPTER 34

…I need to stay awake. I can’t fall asleep.

Despite my nerves, the lack of sleep from the night before clung to me like a debt collector. I kept nodding off, even slapped my own cheeks, but it didn’t help.

At some point, I must have fallen into a deep sleep. I woke up the moment I sensed someone’s presence.

Eyes closed, I sharpened all my senses. I heard the door open.

“Crybaby, you awake? I heard you were sick?”

One of my roommates hadn’t gone straight to the cafeteria after her shift. The one they called “Ms. Min” was the type to shower and change into clean clothes before eating, so she had stopped by the dorm first.

I pulled the blanket up to my chin and rubbed my forehead with my palm like crazy—just in case she touched it, I needed to at least pretend to have a fever.

“Looks like she’s sleeping.”

“Ah… you’re here? I must’ve dozed off.”

“Guess I woke you. Still, eat something before you rest.”

“Ah… I’m not really sick, just feeling off. My stomach’s upset.”

She usually picked on me, but maybe it wasn’t out of genuine hatred. Hearing my weakened voice, she spoke much more gently than usual.

“How’s your stomach upset?”

“Just… nauseous, I guess? I’ve lost my appetite.”

“Mmm…”

I heard the sound of her changing clothes and gathering shower items from across the room. I answered in a dry voice, still on guard.

“How long has it been since you got here? Three months?”

“Yes… around a hundred days?”

“Mmm…”

“……”

“How’s your period? Did you get it last month? I don’t think you did.”

She was keeping track of whether I had my period or not. But her suspicion worked in my favor—she took the bait. Her tone hinted she was wondering if I might be pregnant.

“Uh… I didn’t. Yeah… I guess not… Wait…”

Still lying in bed, I slowly sat up and even pulled back the curtain like I was confused. I stared at her with wide eyes, pretending to be puzzled, and made sure my expression said “this can’t be happening.”

She suddenly came to my bed, sat on the edge, and looked me straight in the face. Then she spoke in a low voice, like she was trying to confirm something.

“Be honest. Did someone here do something to you?”

“No.”

“Don’t lie. Was it one of the men on this island?”

“No, absolutely not.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I swear, nothing like that ever happened…”

I shook my head strongly, like there was no way. She made a face like she’d figured it out anyway—like she knew exactly who it was.

“No way… Chief Shin?”

“……”

“It is, isn’t it? That impotent bastard Shin Chi-woo?”

“I’m scared…”

“Scared? Don’t give me that. You think hiding it will make it go away? If it’s really his baby, this won’t be solved here.”

“What do I do… I don’t know what to do…”

I answered with tears instead of words—neither confirming nor denying. That was enough for her to decide Shin Chi-woo must be the father of the imaginary baby.

“They say Captain Go saw you and Shin Chi-woo doing it before you came ashore. Don’t lie to me. Tell me the truth.”

“……”

“It’s his, right?”

“……”

“Right?”

“…Maybe.”

“Maybe? You—! Always so mouthy, and now you’re acting like an idiot?”

“It is… I think… I think it’s his.”

“You think? You idiot! Either it is or it isn’t—what the hell is ‘think’?”

I nodded slowly, looking crushed, tears silently flowing down my face. My sobbing was so pitiful it probably felt more like a confirmation than if I’d said yes outright. And of course, I didn’t forget to act it out.

“Ugh—”

“See? Morning sickness. You think I don’t know? I’ve had two kids. Wan-yi… you’re pregnant.”

“…What do I do now?”

“What do you mean, what do you do? Damn it… of all people, it had to be him.”

“Uuuugh—”

“Damn it… you really take the cake…”

It wasn’t a hidden phone they found—it was a pregnancy. This was too big a secret to keep between two people. The woman I shared the room with looked overwhelmed.

“This isn’t just your decision. I’m going to Gombo and reporting this.”

“…Okay.”

“Stay here and rest. Keep warm…”

As she gently tucked the blanket around me, guilt and anxiety washed over me. The die had been cast. There was no turning back. All I could do now was hope this fake pregnancy could flip the game.

Tap.

She left in a hurry, the door closing behind her. Once I was alone, I wiped away my tears and changed my expression as if nothing had happened.

I dried my face with my sleeve, pulled the blanket over my head, and lay back down. This was all or nothing now.

As I stared up at the ceiling, imagining all the possible outcomes, my roommates began trickling back in after finishing their meals.

“Ugh, what a gloomy mood. Lying around like a drama queen.”

“She said she’s sick.”

“If she’s sick, she should go to the infirmary. Why stage a protest here?”

“Leave her be. She knows what she’s doing.”

By the time Glasses showed up, the room had returned to its usual atmosphere. The same old bickering, the same daily routines. I realized I’d be saying goodbye to all of it soon.

Their guest had arrived later than I expected, and now I understood why. They’d waited for the crowd to gather—more witnesses to spread the news.

“She’s over there, inside.”

“Mm, I’ll go talk to her.”

“Wan-yi, sit up for a moment.”

The woman who had sensed something was wrong came back, this time with the ballerina. I pulled back the curtain and gave the ballerina a polite bow. She lowered her voice and addressed the room.

“I need to talk to Director Seo’s daughter. Can you all step outside for a moment?”

“What’s going on?”

“It’s personal.”

“With her?”

“Yes, I have something personal to ask her. Now please, out.”

Glasses butted in at the perfect moment, bouncing curiosity-laced questions back at the ballerina. Eventually, she snapped in irritation, and only then did the others leave.

Tap.

I could feel them listening closely outside the door. Of course the ballerina knew everything—I could tell. She barely moved her lips as she spoke in a whisper, like a ventriloquist.

“Chi-woo told me. Let’s cause a scene.”

“Yes.”

“I’ll slap you on the count of three. Scream and cry like you’re hurt. Make sure they all hear it.”

“Okay…”

“One, two. You idiot!”

“Aaaah!”

Smack.

Wait, didn’t you say three?! She slapped me on two. My scream wasn’t acting—it was real.

But the human heart is strange. Even knowing it was a performance, even though it didn’t hurt much, being slapped still carried a weird, bitter sting.

From then on, my tears were real. I used the excuse to cry hard—everything I hadn’t let out when I heard Dad’s voice the day before.

“Huuuuh…”

“You dumb girl! All you do is cry. Damn it… Your father spent all that money on your education and now you’re knocked up—”

“I’m sorry…”

“I already contacted someone in Seoul through another channel. The baby’s father should take responsibility—or go with you to get it taken care of!”

“……”

“Don’t even think about having that baby here! If you do, just throw yourself into the sea!”

She raised her voice, making sure everyone could hear. But beneath it was a hidden message—Chi-woo now had an official reason to act.

“I’m sorry…”

“Stop crying. If you know you messed up, get your head on straight.”

“Yes…”

“Someone’s already on their way from Seoul. Stay put. If you move around too much and lose the baby, we’ll all be blamed. Someone could die because of you!”

“I’ll be careful…”

“You really should just disappear. I had a bad feeling from the start. And now this.”

I was sure by now the ballerina had already worked everything out with Shin Chi-woo. Her constant mentions of “the baby’s father” weren’t for me—they were for the eavesdroppers.