For Your Failed Unrequited Love

Felix came to a halt in the middle of returning the books back on the shelves. The unexpected appearance of his younger brother quickly diminished the smile on his face.

“… Are you organizing the books?”

Felix, who soon came to his senses, looked at Adrian, and Adrian tilted his head.

“So what?”

Adrian became even more confused. It was a natural reaction since his brother had never offered to help with the book club.

Soon Adrian slowly approached him. Walking through the floating dust in the sun, he looked like a devil who came to crush Felix’s joy.

Adrian came closer and whispered, “Did you do something troublesome?”

“No?”

“Why are you helping me all of a sudden?”

“I’m not helping you.”

“Then you were organizing the books here for no reason?” Adrian’s eyes narrowed in suspicion.

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Felix avoided his gaze and began to put the book back in. He didn’t want to explain anything, especially to him.

Adrian looked at him and shrugged. “Well then.” He turned around and approached Lucy, who was nearby. “Lucy, Felix insists on helping us here, so let’s leave it to him.” Adrian took the book Lucy was holding and placed it on top of the books Felix was holding. “Then please.”

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“Wait, are you going to stay here too?” Felix asked. He wanted Adrian to just go away. 

However, Adrian replied mercilessly. “There are a lot of people today, right? Lucy must be having a hard time handling it by herself, so I’ll help her.” He patted Felix on the shoulder and added, “Anyway, thank you for helping us. But don’t put the book in the wrong place. It’s a pain in the ass to find them again later.”

After finishing his words, Adrian turned around. “Let’s go, Lucy.”

They were about to leave the aisle but before being nudged by Adrian and disappearing over the bookshelf, Lucy’s gaze turned to Felix for a moment. She pursed her lips as if to say something, but she soon disappeared from his sight.

Felix was now left to organize the returned books alone, and he stared blankly at the place where Lucy and his brother had disappeared. In front of him were piles of books on the cart that had yet to be put back on the shelf.

He came to ask about the necklace, but he ended up helping Lucy and Adrian to spend time together.

This isn’t it.

He had half a mind to leave behind the mountain of books. He ruffled his hair, annoyed at how the situation unfolded. However, if he didn’t do it, it would all be Lucy’s job. He began to return the books with a look full of dissatisfaction.

It was after a considerable amount of time that all the books on the cart had found their place. As he came back from his task, he saw Lucy and Adrian sitting side by side on the return table.

The two had their heads side by side and talked as if they were discussing something. They looked so close with their shoulders touching and eyes looking at each other.

“Are you done?” Adrian asked, raising his head once he noticed Felix.

“Yeah.”

“Thank you. We’ll take care of it now. You must be busy too; you don’t have to help us anymore.”

It was clear that he meant for him to leave. Felix bit his lips as he held back his displeasure. He was determined not to go back just like that. 

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Without hesitation, he went to the return table where they were sitting. Lucy and Adrian looked up at him as he suddenly broke in, surprised.

“Why are you coming here?”

“Because there’s no empty seat.” Felix beckoned to the table full of students.

“So, you’re going to sit here?” Adrian asked, puzzled.

Felix ignored him and pulled an empty chair. Then he sat at the return table, a little away from Lucy and Adrian. He opened his bag, taking out books one by one.

“What are you doing? Go somewhere else. Only librarians are authorized to enter this place. Lucy is uncomfortable.”

As soon as he heard Lucy’s name from Adrian’s mouth, Felix felt his heart boil. He once again opened his book, completely ignoring Adrian.

“You can go to your room and do that.”

“I don’t want to.”

Adrian had tried to tell his brother nicely, but soon, his expression gradually darkened. He frowned. Felix was being unnecessarily stubborn, unlike usual.  As if giving up dealing with him more, he sighed and said, “Sorry, Lucy. Just ignore Felix.”

Lucy, who was sitting anxiously between the two brothers, lowered her eyes, embarrassed. 

Felix shrugged and casually turned the book in front of him. He knew he was being childish and shouldn’t be doing this. 

I didn’t come here to do this.

Felix turned over the pages roughly.

Either way, Lucy and Adrian became busy again dealing with library work. The two had too much work to do to care about Felix’s mood. Even Lucy, who was glancing as if she were conscious of Felix, seemed busy organizing books at one point. His presence diminished gradually.

The conversation between the two, which he did not want to hear, kept flowing into his ears. They talked about library work that Felix didn’t understand, or about another librarian he didn’t know.

Even if Felix wanted to join the conversation, he had no choice but to listen since they were only talking about why the books they applied for a few months ago were still not coming in or why a first-year student he had never heard of suddenly wanted to quit his club activities.

Felix tapped his book with a pen. At some point, the ink oozing from the nib began to stain the paper. He, who had been quietly listening to the conversation that had been flowing into his ear, finally capped the pen and slam it down. The sound was so loud that it echoed around the book return desk.

Not only did Adrian and Lucy look around at once, but also some students who were sitting at a nearby table looked up to find the source of the sound.

“What’s wrong?” Adrian asked, surprised.

“There are things I don’t understand even after reading.” Felix tapped the book in front of him with his finger.

“What is it?” Adrian got up from his seat. But even before he approached, Felix spoke out first. “Not you.” Felix pointed to Lucy, who was looking at him with bewildered eyes from a distance. “Let Lucy tell me.”

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At Felix’s words, Adrian stood up, irritated. “Are you really going to be like this?”

“What?” Felix asked back in a formidable demeanor. He now openly expressed his displeasure. Even though he knew how childish he looked right now.

Adrian, who was about to retaliate, bit his lip to see if he had changed his mind. He seemed determined not to respond to Felix. He then turned to Lucy and said, “Don’t worry about him.” 

“But…” Over Adrian’s shoulder, Lucy tried to say something with a complicated expression on her face. but at that time, another returned book came in. She hurriedly stood up and look for the loan card.

Felix looked down sullenly. The spotty ink mark spread even more as if it were the grumpiness rising from his heart. He stared blankly at the stain for quite a long time.

For the past few weeks, he had had a glimmer of hope that he might be able to turn Lucy’s heart to himself. He actually had a good time with her too, at least for him, it was an incomparable happy time.

However, as soon as he saw Lucy with Adrian, his confidence leaked out as if it were in a perforated bag. Instead, the only thing that rose anew in his heart was jealousy accompanied by childishness.

“Adrian-sunbae, I can’t find the loan card for this book.” Lucy, who was searching through the box, asked Adrian for help. Soon the two put their shoulders together and began to look through the cards in the box.

Felix stared blankly at her back. He knew that the two of them had been together longer than he had begun to recognize Lucy. Maybe they had more pleasant memories between them than the time Lucy had with him.

It felt like a wall was erected. There seemed to be no room between Lucy and Adrian for him to intervene. It had a greater impact on him when he saw it in front of his eyes.